User:Andrés/special/2012halloween

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"In Satan we trust."
Serving over 12,472 articles since April 15th, 2011
Article of the Now
Halloween
Back in the old days, Halloween costumes used to look like this. Genuinely fucking creepy.

Halloween is that special time of year we remember the birth of Satan. Due to it's demonic origins people, especially children are more likely to be killed on this night than at any other time of the year.

Because of this there are many urban legends surrounding Halloween intending to make it even more scary, such as poisoned candy, satanic murders and mannequins which turn out to be genuine corpses. Except these are not stories - they are true.


(CONTINUE TO SPOOKY READING)
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Quote of the Now
   
 
Halloween was confusing. All my life my parents said, "Never take candy from strangers" And then they dressed me up and said, "Go beg for it" I didn’t know what to do! I’d knock on people’s doors and go, "Trick or treat" "No thank you".
 

 
 

—Halloween is a cover-up for pedos

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