⚠️ Encyclopedia Dramatica is currently being restored by automated scripts ⚠️

There's been a lot of questions as to what's going on with the site and what comes next. So we have this (ordered) roadmap of what's being worked on and what's to come. This will be updated until the roadmap is complete as Æ has a lot of missing features and ideas that I'd like to fix in regards to its offerings before I implement big plans for the site's popularity and well-being in 2021.

Æ Roadmap

  • Content restoration (Mostly done, few things missing that will be restored sporadically)
  • Image restoration (Being run in background, nothing I can do cept wait)
  • Æ Imageboard (Currently being worked on)
  • Mediawiki upgrade and backend fixes
  • .onion domain for Tor-friendly editing and viewing
  • CSS overhaul (Fixing things like the videos on mobile, and overall a rehaul of the wiki's look to be more friendly to readers)
  • Paid bounty board for new articles (Won't be managed by me for legal reasons however I will ensure it runs smoothly)
  • Anonymous phone # service for those seeking ban evades from Twitter as well as a phone number not tied to their name (more details at launch)

  • Currently we are nearing our annual LLC renewal fee ($650) as well throwing the funds required for these other changes and aspects. If you would like to support Æ consider purchasing a copy of The Hustler's Bible or securing some Merch. Donating is also appreciated however I would rather give something back as per the two options above.

    If you have any questions you can join our public Telegram chat to DM me privately or @ me in chat.

    You can also email me via [email protected]

    Merch notes: Thank you to all who have purchased merch. We will ship late January or mid February depending on our provider's speed.

    Here's to setting the world on fire in 2021! - aediot



    Solaris

    From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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    Solaris (moar liek "Slowlaris", amirite) is a UNIX based operating system created by Sun Microsystems. It is known for its power and unique ability to run on expensive, high quality Sun hardware and for being so amazing that no human can possibly comprehend it.

    Origins

    Billions of years ago there were numerous bloated yet relatively useless UNIX-based systems floating around the universe, doing little more than answering the occasional database query or giving system administrators and engineers a means to pretend to work. Then, one fateful day they all collided due to their collectively massive gravitational attraction, forming one dense singularity shining brilliantly in the sky, which many expected would explode in a supernova. It didn't, however, and Sun began marketing it as a new UNIX variant.

    Decline In Use

    In recent years Solaris has seen a decline in the number of installations. The reasons for this are twofold. First, the hardware requirements are beyond the resources of most companies, which can afford a limited amount of hydrogen and antimatter to power the machines. Second, after years of existing as a singularity Solaris has a tendency to take on the early stages of a super nova and vaporize several nearby planets. As a result many systems have migrated to the far superior Plan 9.

    File:Solaris3.jpg
    George Clooney taking some time off from selling coffee.(A human rights campaigner who stars in an ad campaign for Nescaffe, a branch of Nestle: Nestle is a company who has one of the very worst records of human rights violations of any company in the world. Fucking douchebag hypocrite.)

    Users

    International law prohibits anyone from seriously working with Solaris unless they have a few qualifications. First, they must be over 9000 years old. Second, they must have more facial hair than everyone in their native country combined (also, beards must exist in multiple dimensions). And finally, they must be virgins.

    George Clooney is a well-known Solaris activist. He is said to have visited the actual Solaris during level 2 of his pokemon transformation into Fagchu.

    As expected, the reviews of the film were fail.


       
     
    "Instead, what they created was a movie with little joy, no oomph, and paced so agonizingly slow that I fought a constant battle against nodding off."
     

     
     

    — A very wise man, About.com:Hollywood Movies.

    OpenSolaris

    OpenSolaris is a fork of Solaris marketed towards free software fanatics. Nevertheless, Sun Microsystems didn't want the OS is be entirely free, so they created the CDDL, which is incompatible with the GPL. As with OpenOffice.org, Sun hoped to make money off of anti-Micro$oft free software hippies. They expected to create a free software community that would rival the Linux community. As always, Sun failed and was bought by Oracle.

    On August 15, 2010, it was revealed that OpenSolaris was dead. Oracle had took it out back and shot it in the head. Nothing of value was lost.