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Æ Roadmap

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    Here's to setting the world on fire in 2021! - aediot



    Scalies

    From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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    File:Placeholder1.jpg
    An example of the kind of faggorty scalies call "art".

    There is very little difference between Scalies and Furries. Like their animal fucking retarded cousins, scalies fantasize about fucking outside their species, but instead of animals with fur, these suck ficks dream of fucking fish, reptiles, and dinosaurs.

    Scalies are, much like furries, the scum of the earth, but on the internet food chain, they come right in front of You, due to you being completely useless. Scalies are about 99% female, and rather than fapping to pictures of half human, half reptile pr0n pics, they write fanfics, draw stupid pictures featuring love (which should nevar be more than an excuse for getting laid) rather than pr0n, and make retarded "music" videos that play music so shitty you wouldn't think it even existed, as well as their dragon "art". An interesting fact to note is that scalies don't create half human, half dragon art (that would be gay), ALL of their "art" is pure scale. All scalies are fat. All scalies wear glasses, and all scalies have a zero percent chance of being accepted by the superior race. The closest thing they can come to is getting raped like so many of them have been.

    The Overall goal of Scalies

    File:Oldspyro.jpg
    Fuck you! I'm a dragon!

    It is the scaly dream that somewhere, in some alternate universe, lives them in a perfect dragon form with a family and dragon children. All scalies desire for their physical human form to burn away, and for them to be reborn as their dragon on their dragon world. Scalies wish they were either Spyro or Cynder the dragon, and for many different reasons. Female scalies, (and in some cases, confused male scalies), wish they were Cynder because either a. her life is ten times the life they can hope to have or b. they are so desparate to get laid that they'd rape an aspie who can't possibly defend himself. Either way, all scalies are faggots, worse than furries, and all of the vermin known as "scalies" must be exterminated.

    Where Do Scalies Come From?

    All scalies are the result of someone having played Spyro The Dragon at some points in their lives, then came back and played The Legend Of Spyro and laid their eyes on Cynder. Parents, if you can help it, never let your child touch Spyro The Dragon, especially not The Legend Of Spyro, or you will regret it for the rest of your lives...probably living in your basement. After the initial infection, scalies will go to Deviantart where they will draw picture after picture of dragons, dragon porn, Cynder porn, and other faggotry that need not be named.

    Male Scalies

    Unlike furries where they are 100% male, scalies are only 99% female, meaning there are some male scalies in existence, but they are generally harder to spot. The biggest tip off that you are the victim of a male scaly is scaly porn. 99% of which features Cynder, Ember, or Spyro, or a combination of the three. Unlike the females, male scalies are absolutely useless, and should not exist. If you see them, encourage them to An Hero, because the less of them, the better.

    Scaly Movies

    The movie that caused over 9000 deaths in North America alone
    • Dragons: Destiny Of Fire: a COMPLETE ripoff of the storyline to The Legend Of Spyro made by a bunch of Mexicans because with this economy, the demand for drugs has declined. Overall: Terrible, although Marina, being completely unrelated to Cynder, has proved to be of some use for Mexican Scalies
    • Spyro 3D: a massive (and successful) trolling tactic by Activision that singlehandedly caused more BAWWS and deaths than /b/. The movie was originally going to be an action film of the Legend of Spyro story, but was canceled for the lulz, resulting in mass suicide among fans.
    • How to train your Dragon: A movie that is supposedly supposed to be about some viking scrub that trains a dragon, but we know that it's really a clever tactic to recruit future Scalies.
    • Eragon: A carbon copy of how to train your dragon, but with real life people!

    What To Do If Your Friend Is Infected

    If your friend is (un)fortunate enough to be a scaly, then you have the opportunity of a lifetime at your hands. If you are a guy and your friend is a scaly, (and it's a girl (which it is)) then follow the steps below:

    • 1. Pretend you're interested in the story of Legend Of Spyro.
    • 2. Download several pictures you find of Spyro and Cynder fan "Art" and claim you drew them yourself. A fake signature works well.
    • 3. Convince her that you're really into her.
    • 4. Make a suit for yourself that looks like Spyro the dragon. Caution: Resist every urge to become a scaly, or else you are guarenteed to fail miserably.
    • 5. Invite her over for a cosplay act and tell her to bring her Cynder suit.
    • 6. Suggest you two re-enact the ending to Spyro Dawn Of The Dragon.
    • 7. Make sure a bed is nearby.
    • 8. ??????
    • 9. PROFIT!!

    On the other hand, if your friend is a guy and he is a scaly, you have a little work to do don't you? Here's a few things you can try:

    • -Make him watch regular porn for a while, and remind him that he is a human.
    • -Give him amnesia through certain unsaid means.
    • -Convince him that he should become a dragon this very minute.
    • -Hand him some "relief" pills.
    • -Convince him that his dragon form is An Hero.

    Gallery

    See Also

    Fur series.jpg

    Scalies is part of a series on

    Furfaggotry

    Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage.