⚠️ Encyclopedia Dramatica is currently being restored by automated scripts ⚠️

There's been a lot of questions as to what's going on with the site and what comes next. So we have this (ordered) roadmap of what's being worked on and what's to come. This will be updated until the roadmap is complete as Æ has a lot of missing features and ideas that I'd like to fix in regards to its offerings before I implement big plans for the site's popularity and well-being in 2021.

Æ Roadmap

  • Content restoration (Mostly done, few things missing that will be restored sporadically)
  • Image restoration (Being run in background, nothing I can do cept wait)
  • Æ Imageboard (Currently being worked on)
  • Mediawiki upgrade and backend fixes
  • .onion domain for Tor-friendly editing and viewing
  • CSS overhaul (Fixing things like the videos on mobile, and overall a rehaul of the wiki's look to be more friendly to readers)
  • Paid bounty board for new articles (Won't be managed by me for legal reasons however I will ensure it runs smoothly)
  • Anonymous phone # service for those seeking ban evades from Twitter as well as a phone number not tied to their name (more details at launch)

  • Currently we are nearing our annual LLC renewal fee ($650) as well throwing the funds required for these other changes and aspects. If you would like to support Æ consider purchasing a copy of The Hustler's Bible or securing some Merch. Donating is also appreciated however I would rather give something back as per the two options above.

    If you have any questions you can join our public Telegram chat to DM me privately or @ me in chat.

    You can also email me via [email protected]

    Merch notes: Thank you to all who have purchased merch. We will ship late January or mid February depending on our provider's speed.

    Here's to setting the world on fire in 2021! - aediot



    Rush Limbaugh

    From Encyclopedia Dramatica
    Jump to navigation Jump to search
    File:Obama-epicfail.jpg
    Rush Limbaugh's thoughts on Obama (Epic Fail!)
    File:Rushrush.jpg
    It is believed he "gets up at seven, yeah and goes to work at nine." However, he posses "no time for livin' yes, he's working all the time"

    Rush Limbaugh III, El Rushbo, Mount Rushmore, Santa Rush or Jabba the Rush is a sweaty, wrinkled mass of neoconservativism and hate that wobbles about the human spectrum desperately searching for the first born children of liberals to feast upon. Most famous for translating Mein Kampf into English and re-titling the book as The Way Things Ought to Be, he spouts brilliantly fucktarded views to the point of lulz, insensately clogging his arteries with cholesterol and bad politics. Occasionally, Rush even attempts to be funny on his radio show and fails miserably every time, causing the resounding clasps of facepalming to echo around the world. He waddles about the Jewnited States of Americunts, shaking its very foundations with every fat ignorant step, shoving cigars into his slobbering mouth like they were the black cocks he so very craves. Like Ann Coulter and other right-wing media pundits, he can be described as a professional troll which is his most redeeming value; a great way to troll liberals is simply to bring up his name in any online conversation and watch their heads explode. Hell, it weren't for the whiny liberals who fear him as though he was the Beast in the Book of Revelation rather than the simple fat fuck that he is, he wouldn't have any relevence beyond a handful of trailer park residents, Christian homeschoolers, and grumpy old farts on SSI.

    History

    File:Rush-nou.jpg
    NO U, McCain!
    File:Limbaugh oxycontin.jpg
    Rush Limbaugh in an unreleased Oxycontin advertisement

    Limbawww was a military brat and is from a family of lawyers in Missouri. In fact, he actually has relatives in the District Supreme Court of Missouri. So if you hate him and live in Missouri, or are even slightly left wing (which is unlikely seeing as the Bible-belt is populated solely by cousin-fucking fundies), then you're fucked.

    After failing out of Southeast Missouri State University, the shitty backwater commuter college in his home town, he went to the Connecticut School of Broadcasting (where all radio hacks go to school when they're not good enough to go to a place like Cambridge), but he didn't even graduate, and is proud of it. Why he was anywhere near a blue state is anyone's guess. There, he joined the Republican Party and gave head to his god Ronald Reagan on a semi-regular basis.

    At the end of the 1980s, he combed his Flock of Seagulls haircut, became a modern day warrior mean mean pride, and got a midday radio show. It became a rousing success, adored by conservatives and loathed by everyone else.

    tl;dr:

    Use this information to your advantage.

    Drama

    File:Rushlimberaugh.jpg
    Rush and Mikhail Gorbachev: war criminal aficionados. Plus, notice how happy Gorbachev looks.

    At any one time, Rush Limbaugh is carrying more illegal pills than a Columbian street pusher in Miami. In 2003, Limbaugh was revealed to be a member of an illegal prescription drug ring, from which he regularly purchased Oxycontin and Hydrocodone (tl;dr version). One man, who had partied with Rush, was recorded saying "I have never seen anyone snort, nor shove that much Oxy in their nose and ass at one time, I thought he was going to die!" In a heartfelt broadcast, he apologized to his listeners by stating he was "addicted to prescription pain medication" and that he was "no role model," despite the fact that Christianity and conservatism are supposed to be family friendly and the only true way.

    He was also caught carrying a fairly sizable quantity of Viagra not prescribed to him when he returned from the Dominican Republic in mid 2006 (linkage). After getting v& for felony prescription fraud and possession of a controlled substance, he avoided the inevitable buttsecks in a Federal Penitentiary by saying he was deeply sorry and checked into rehab. Aren't those damn illegal immigrant Mexicans supposed to be the ones bringing drugs into the country, validating closing the borders?


       
     
    OxyContin, methadone, vicadin, hydrocodone, Dilaudid if you're lucky, Darvocet, um... codeine, morphine if you can get it, heroin if you can't. Let's see, I also like Dermeral, Darvon, Fentanyl, and Percocet I guess. If I can't get any of these, I just chew some valarian root and punch holes in walls.
     

     
     

    —Rush Limbaww. So the only reason not to legalize pot is because it doesn't get you as high as vicodin or percocet. How Christian.[1]

    In 2009 he was hilariously made official leader of the Republican Party and Michael Steele was forced to apologize for criticizing his show and for cheating on him with Glenn Beck.

    Obesity

    Like most conservatards from the South, Rush Limbaugh has historically been a tremendous, morbidly obese shitbag throughout most of his adult life. There was a period of time where Limbaugh rapidly dropped a ton of weight with the help of drug abuse. During this period of being not as fat as he was before, Limbaugh snapped a shitload of photographs that he recycled on his website in order to give the illusion of sustained weight loss. However, Limbaugh is still quite fat, as has long been evidenced on current clips displayed on his daily "Dittocam". The bottom line is, Rush Limbaugh is still a Big Fat Idiot.

    Conservative Values

    File:Rushinmycloset.jpg
    Mooom! Please tell Rush that Christians are supposed to think masturbation is like abortion, and an affront to GOD

    As chief cheerleader for the shrill ultra-right wing of the Republican Party, Limbaugh walks the walk by living his life in accordance with established Republican values. When he's not giving blow jobs to George W. Bush, Rush Limbaugh leads by example with such endeavors as illegally obtaining prescription narcotics and broken dick medicine; getting married and divorced 3 times in a solemn effort to ensure triple protection for the sanctity of marriage; and flying his fat ass to the Dominican Republic for some hot 9-year-old ladyboy action, with that illegally obtained broken dick medicine after his last divorce to take advantage of that country's extremely liberal stance on prostitution. He also became deaf from having one too many cumshots land in his ear hole, and has since had a chip wired directly to Republican talking points radio wired into his skull.

    Stuttering and Hearing Loss

    File:Baugh.jpg
    Rush doing what he does best (after OxyContin)

    Rush Limbaugh stutters and stammers so abundantly during his self-dubbed "Excellence in Broadcasting" radio show, that he is the highest paid drug addicted, morbidly obese, convicted criminal impotent piece of shit on record. This recent address to Congress pretty much proved that he is beyond hope.

    Deeply insecure about this own peech inspediment, Rush accused beloved actor Michael J. Fox of faking his Parkinson's Disease shaky levels on TV to garner sympathy votes for a pro-stem cell research, Democratic advocate campaigning for Congress in the US 2006 mid-term elections.

    After getting an earful of butthurt for this he was only slightly sorry.

    Due to his massive consumption of Vicodin and Oxycontin's (he thought they were M&M's at first) he's also deaf, and can be seen with a hearing aid. This partly explains why noone can talk any sense into him. He needs a stenographer on the show to tell him what callers are saying. So how do we know if he's just a puppet of said stenographer? Who knows? He often has one-sided conversations with himself on air while pounding his desk, proving his insanity.

    Friend of the lulz

    Recently, this upstanding man has called for his loyal Dittoheads to infiltrate the Democratic Party and vote for noted Muslim Barack Muhammed Hussein Obama, therefore indirectly electing action hero John McClane and making the world safe for democracy. To this end, he advocates riots and arson in Denver, the city where the Democratic National Convention was held in the 2008 DNC. When asked why, he said, "I did it for the lulz."

    Bring on the race war!

    In the midst of an increasingly tense presidential campaign, Rush had a few choice words to say about black people he had some black guy taking his place for him once, that's not racist, is it? (and also apparently forgot that Bill Ayers isn't black):

    Cue Chocolate Rain.

    HNNNNNNGGGGG

    Last Thursday, Rush Limbaugh suffered a heart attack while in Hawaii. Liberals throughout the world were jubilant about the possibility of Rush's impending death. Sadly, Twittering "Rush Limbaugh is dead. TMZ to confirm in 10 minutes." will not make it become true. Like Fidel Castro and Kim Jong-il Dead, Rush is likely to live forever proving that God does not exist. Meanwhile, dittoheads were feeling butthurt over the fact that the majority of the public actually despises Limbaugh and think the world would be a better place without him. They claim that Rush never celebrated the death or illness of any liberal and compassionate conservatives such as themselves are above such things.


       
     
    Neuticles are just plain neat!
     

     
     

    —Rush Limbaugh on neuticles [2].

    Rush gets Pwned

    While guest hosting Wheel of Fortune 2.0, various audience member activists try to cause Rush butthurt. It begins around a minute into the video with one black person drama, which gets Rush's attention and lulz ensue. Holy shit waht! Rush is not on the radio here!

    Rush Knows his Women

    Late February, Rush decided to have the brilliant idea of calling a feminazi fighting for the coverage of birth control under insurance coverage a slut, prostitute, hooker for hire, and pussy peddler, and then promptly told her she should GTFO the courtrooms and get back to the kitchen. Despite the hard hitting truth that women have no business in politics, all of the advertisers of the program proceeded to drop him like the hot sack of shit he is, effectively ending his career.


       
     
    So, Ms. Fluke and the rest of you feminazis, here's the deal. If we are going to pay for your contraceptives, and thus pay for you to have sex, we want something for it, and I'll tell you what it is. We want you to post the videos online so we can all watch
     

     
     

    Just a few of the advertising companies to drop him:

    AccuQuote Life Insurance
    Allstate Insurance
    American Heart Association
    AOL
    Aquarium of the Pacific
    AutoZone
    Bare Escentuals
    Bethesda Sedation Dentistry
    Bill Kidd's Toyota-Volvo-Scion
    Bonobos
    Capital One
    Carbonite Cascades Dental
    Citrix
    Cleveland Cavaliers
    Consolidated Credit
    Constant Contact
    Cunningham Security
    Downeast Energy
    Exergen
    Freedom Debt Relief
    Geico
    Goodwill
    Hadeed Carpet
    Heart & Body Extract
    J.C. Penney
    John Deere
    Legal Zoom
    Matrix Direct
    Netflix
    Norway Savings Bank
    PageOne Advertising
    Philadelphia Orchestra
    PolyCom
    Portland Ovations
    ProFlowers
    Quicken Loans
    Regal Assets
    Reputation Rhino
    RSVP Discount Beverage
    Sears
    Sensa
    Service Magic
    The Sleep Train
    Sleep Number
    St. Vincent’s Medical Center
    Stamps.com
    Tax Resolution
    Thompson Creek Windows
    TurboTax
    Vitacost

    In addition, Peter Gabriel and Rush's lawyer demanded their music quit being played on the show

    See Also

    Portal trolls.png

    Rush Limbaugh is part of a series on

    Trolls

    Visit the Trolls Portal for complete coverage.

    Rush Limbaugh
    is part of a series on Politics.
    Ideologies: [You are wrong!We are right!]

    Alt-rightAnarchyCapitalismCentrismCommunismConservatismDemocratHippieLiberalismLibertarianismMiltopismNaziNihilismNeo-conPacifismRepublicanReconquistaSocialismStoner GuruTory

    Issues: [Fuck it, Too lazy.Get it fixed!]

    AbortionArab SpringBahrainBarron TrumpBirthCISPADeath penaltyDrugsEnvironmentalismGaysGeorge Bush doesn't care about black peopleGirlfriendsMarijuana AddictionGround Zero MosqueMarijuana AddictionMass ShootingGun controlGunsHealthcare (2) (3)• HomelessHousing CrisisHuntingIceslaveIranMarriageMiller TestMiltopiaNAUPimpin'RacismShoesTaxesTerrorismUnemploymentWarWelfare

    Politicians: [Rigging Elections is funVote for me]

    AhmadinejadAkinB.AllenG. AllenAngleAshburnBachmannBhuttoBin LadenBlagojevichBlairBoehnerG.BrownS.BrownBunningJim TraficantDubya BushGeorge H. W. BushBurrByrdCainCameronChavezCheCheneyChomskyChretienChurchillClintonClinton IIChelsea Clinton Hillary Clinton CleggCohenColemanCorbynCowgerCraigCthulhuCunninghamCurtisD'AlemaDeanDelayDuterteDwyerEdwardsFaganFiorinaFoleyGerald FordRob FordGellerGillardGingrichGiulianiGonzalesGoreGrahamGravelGreeneGriffinHagueHansonHardingHarperHitlerHowardHuckabeeHusseinJacksonJamesJidetteJohnsonJohnson, BorisKennedyLaRoucheLBJLottKerryKindKissingerKucinichLewinskyLiebermanLimbaughLoughnerMajorMarceaux.comMarxMcBerryMcCainMcHenryMcKinneyMercerMichael BloombergMooreMorocco MoleMussoliniNaderNixonObamaO'DonnellOsbornePainePaladinoPalinPaulPelosiPencePerryPinochetPrittPutinQuahQuayleRasanskyReaganRendellRiceRobertsonRomneyRoveRuddRumsfeldRyanSaakashviliSandersSantorumSchumerSchwarzeneggerSharptonCyril SmithJacqui SmithSpitzerStevensStranahanSupremeTaitzThatcherThompsonThorleyTPMMuckraker MoleTrudeauTrumpVenturaVitterWarsiWashingtonWaxmanWeinerWestWilliamsWilsonWolfowitzXXenophon

    Parties: [No beer? Fuck that.Hell yeah, a party!]

    America's Third PartyBlack BlocDramacratic PartyHard PartyLemon PartyLiberal Party of AustraliaNorth American DONG PartyOBAMACORNSocialist Workers PartyPirate PartyZapatistas

    Tactics: [Rage Quit.How do I get elect?]

    2013 US Government ShutdownBlaming ChinaCaptain Nigga DefendaCloward Piven StrategyCuckservativesDemockeryDoomsday ClockG20 Toronto LollercaustLiberal Butthurt SyndromeLiberal guiltMacaca#NotMySuperbowlChampsOccupy DemocratsOperation LemonpartyRaped StatisticsThe ResistanceUpworthyWunderground

    See also: 2012 Elections2016 Presidential ElectionsInternet PoliticsPizzaGatePolitical communities

    Featured article March 12 and 13, 2012
    Preceded by
    Joseph Kony
    Rush Limbaugh Succeeded by
    My Little Pony