Robert Wayne Stiles
Enjoy your cock! 8====D (_(__)
|100px||Robert Wayne Stiles is an Epic Lolcow|
One page alone is not enough...
Why not read Robert's fiction that will make him millions any day now?
—Robert on his exploits, being completely serious
—Robert, an Internet expert
Robert Wayne "Rika" Stiles or Wraith Beliskner (legal name now Natalie Mercedes Langley) is an "asexual" troll shielding transsexual juggalo and self-appointed "High Warlord of the Wraith". He got the most attention when he got butthurt at trolls for releasing his actual name and threatened to sue them. He went to tardrage onto 789chan with threats of suing or hacking anyone who dared to make fun of him, much to the other users and the admin's amusement. He later went on to become a shit-flinging, bath salt addicted prostitute who slits his wrists and claims that trolls ruined his life and his happiness. Did we also mention that he has an Oedipus Complex and has his mother stroke his hard dick?
Being the master of disguise that he is, his other aliases include Athena Veritas, Marissa Veritas, Ashley Verazanno, Marissa Binxly, Natasha Valentine, and most recently, Natalie Sharp.
- 1 Typical Robert Wayne Stiles thread
- 2 The Origins of the Beast
- 3 Vanned Robert
- 4 Rika Stiles or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Hate my Dick
- 5 Rage Against the Trolls
- 6 Return of the Lolcow: Transtastic Boogaloo
- 7 "It's your fault!"
- 8 Robbie and Ponies - Shit's getting desperate
- 9 Robb's Return to 789chan
- 10 The Scars That Never Heal
- 11 Caved
- 12 Taking Down EncyclopediaDramatica
- 13 Robert the Playa
- 14 Masta of Disguise
- 15 Kickstarter for Robbie's Groceries
- 16 Insanity
- 17 Personal Army: Part Deux
- 18 Robb vs. Troll; Feces Everywhere
- 19 Back to his old tricks
- 20 Robb, the Monkey Whore
- 21 NATALAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
- 22 Spreading Herpes
- 23 Robb's Brown Shitty Bed
- 24 Robb the Pedophile
- 25 Robb vs. Red Minus and Asians
- 26 Bioshocked Robb
- 27 Robbman Bates
- 28 A gallery of mad
- 29 Robbisms
- 30 Musical Robb
- 31 Erobica
- 32 Robb gets SASSed
- 33 Faggot versus Faggot
- 34 Robert and the real doll
- 35 The Goblin and the Spoon
- 36 The Ladystick
- 37 Robert the dogfucker
- 38 So cash
- 39 External Links
- 40 See Also
Typical Robert Wayne Stiles thread
- Anonymous makes fun of Robb
- Robb appears, threatening to DOX everyone
- Robb gets trolled hard, swears never to return
So far this has happened thirty-one(31) times, proving Robb is, without any doubt, completely, utterly incapable of learning. The mental capacity of Robert ranks somewhere beneath that of an insect. On no occasion has he shown any ability to reason or employ logic. Attempting to accomplish a task, failing, then by trial and error discovering a new solution, is a skill shared by many members of the animal kingdom but lost on the braindead transsexual lolcow.
The Origins of the Beast
To understand Robert, one must know his past, that is the source of both his endless paranoia and pride in being such a cool epic troll way back then. According to Robb's sob story, he grew up a spoiled rich aspie whose parents were understandably ashamed of him and bought him whatever he wanted so they wouldn't have to deal with how much of a failure their son is. If that wasn't so horrible yet, his parents also abused him by making him attend church. He was also, unsurprisingly, sheltered from the cruel, cruel world that would make fun of him in the future.
Robb’s high school years were a troubling time for the young wraithlord. Teenage boys shoved his ass into lockers on a daily basis and teenage girls pitied him. The teachers held him down when he had gotten into one of his infamous tardrages. If that didn’t give you any clue of Robb’s high school drama, he was the most unpopular boy in school and fell into the “retard” high school cliche. In typical cliché high school style, the jocks and popular kids kicked the crap out of him on a daily basis. Even the nerds and the goths at his school laughed at him.
He tried to combat his classmates by threatening to set the school on fire, throwing water balloons at jocks, painting rock band logos outside girl's bathrooms, stealing tests, and crashing dances. He later claimed that his schoolboy mischief from 4th grade to high school was how he invented trolling. However, his actions at the time were not enough to prove to his classmates that he was badass. Too weak to rape his classmates in a cave and too pussy to pull a Columbine, Robb turned to the internet for help. Thus, he created the Wraith to whine about his classmates. He had also used it to trollshield his ex-girlfriend. And by girlfriend, we mean a girl he met twice and cybered with. Not to be confused with an actual relationship
Speaking of "The Wraith," Robb had founded the group in late 2005 when he was a few months shy of being 18 years old, while the rest of his classmates were out getting part-time jobs and getting laid. It is no surprise that he was the oldest of the group. According to Robb, the hacker group was mostly used to "troll" Christians and fans of certain franchises and was used to force 13 year old boys with female characters to cyber with him while his 13 year old followers watched and even joined in. More like "Pedo Wraith," amirite? While Robb describes that he was well known and feared, those who bother to dig into his past, get an entirely different image. But a word of warning, the amount of autism and trying too hard will make you cringe.
Robert, the amazing atheist. Only the banana is missing.
Now you have been made familiar with Robert's epic trollshielding past. Quite impressive, wasn't it? Yes, we know, it wasn't.
It should be obvious, from his story and quotes above that he really, truly wants to believe his life is exciting, dramatic, or noteworthy in any way and that his mental growth was arrested at the age of 12 and he thinks that a cartoon villain is exactly how a manipulative adult acts. While calling himself a warlord and thinking that he has victims that remember his name with fear seems beyond retarded to us, something only a completely broken homebody would say, attempting to troll people is to Robert the closest he's ever come to doing something meaningful. Robert, to this day, keeps telling himself that having some kids complain about him ruining a VIDEO GAME for them means he had some kind of immense power.
What Robb considers to be his greatest accomplishment was his trolling of Alex Murrel. One fine day, Robb got pissed at Alex and had his buddies phish her Myspace account, stole the songs from her site, and blackmailed her for them. Not before making a comic about their recent "achievement". Unfortunately for Robb and his buddies, Alex's account was only down temporarily. As evident here, Robb's attempt at ruining her music career failed. Indeed, it was a Robb plan. The intent was "evil," but the execution was laughable.
—Robb dealt with internet issues then as he does now
Even Robb's fellow wraith members laughed at him and still do to this day. To them, Robb was their own personal Nero, they continued to follow the batshit insane beta due to the hugbox-mentality that the group had. Robb, in return, had compared his merry band of unknown butthurt basement dwellers to famous online terrorists who at one point affiliated with a similar group. You can view some of Robb's Wraith-related tardrages here and here.
Apparently there were those who saw Robert's potential lying in lolcowdom rather than in being an epic troll even back then, and someone decided to drop DOX on him. Unfamiliar with how to handle such situation, poor Robert never recovered.
In order to become epin, our budding script kiddie typed "hacking" into Google and ended up in Hackforums.com, that is equal amounts a waste dump of children not being able to tie their own shoes who want to be hackers just like in Matrix and a brilliant scam to take their unearned money from them. Presumably Robb climbed up the social ladders of this respectable community, and paid at least $3500 of mommy and daddy money so that his internet friends could have their own subforum and an unique forum signature. Being the only one so colossally retarded to actually do this, Robert Wayne Stiles became the High Warlord of the Wraith.
But he wasn't quite done wasting his parents money. When Robb was not being the leader of The Wraith, he was attending college at Camden County College trying to get an Associates degree in Graphic Design. Yes, our Robb had high hopes of creating video games. However, being an epic troll and stalking celebrities and ex-pornstars took away much of his time and energy. After FOUR YEARS of attending a two year school, Robb quit college.
And to prove that he indeed is a certified artist although the complete opposite is obvious to anyone who possesses functioning eyes, he proceeded to post surprisingly good art. And of course because "good" in no way describes anything Robert has ever produced, his "art" he underlined HE had made to justify him wasting four years of his life and his parents' money, it was in the matter of minutes exposed as stolen. Not even "traced", but "right click" and "Save as" from an art site.
Again being very in touch with the reality, Robbie wanted to lose his virginity to a pornstar. So, Robert dreamt of an e-romance with Crissy Moran, a retired pornstar. Alas, she did not return his love, for some reason. Being untrue to the Mission, Robert started "trolling" her out of bitterness and sexual frustration. This led to the girl getting the FBI involved. And because unlike the cyberpolice, the FBI gets the shit done, and the agent told Robert to stop being a tard. Robert decided it would've been a bright idea to send death threats to an FBI agent over the internet and over the phone. How could some FBI possibly trace phonecalls, anyway? To make a long story short, the FBI agent sent a party van to Robert's house and Robert is still on probation for sending an FBI agent death threats like the retarded juggalo he is. Not before whining to his online hugbox about it.
|Robb's plea to his "hacker" brethren|
Furyan, the founder of wraith, is currently being harassed by the FBI. All I ask of you is to read his words, think about them, and freely choose whether or not to help. This is not a request for an illegal attack on the FBI or any other branch/face of the Federal government.
I'm coming after you LEGALLY. I already left a nice message on the answering machine demanding to speak to your supervisor. And even if I don't get an answer. I'm still calling the Wilshire office tomorrow. And I will certainly file a Freedom of Information Act. You know for awhile I have been getting legal advice. Since January I knew you were lying to me. Hell back January your story was different from what you told me a few months ago.
End message (from furyan)
Lets take a look at the long list of lies you told me.
Lie #1 "Half of your stuff is being shipped back to "Philadelphia"
You have been telling me this one since the late of December. Last time I talked to you you claimed it was already shipped back to Philly. Guess what, About 4 weeks ago I was at the Philadelphia office. There they contacted the nice man (I'm not disclosing his name) with the fake Italian accent (which he didn't have when he spoke to my father) who then went onto tell me they did not have the stuff and if they did they would give it back. By the way this man also claimed he no longer has any involvement in the case. Guess my stuff was never shipped back as you claimed meaning you are still holding it.
Lie #2 "You never give me your number to call you back"
You pulled this one last time I called you, Let me see I gave you my number on NUMEROUS occasions. gave it to you the LAST TIME, and the time before that, Hell I gave you my number back towards Christmas time. I called Numerous times when you were IN the office leaving my number to other agents who said you would call me back. So that means only one thing, You have been purposely evading calls because you have nothing on me. And every call that does manage to go through to you which you can't evade you pull a fear mongering lie to shut me up, not going to work any more buddy. And for crying out loud, your supposed to be some badass FBI agent, You came to my place with a fucking gun and my IP addresses and you can't track a fucking call? You got millions of dollars worth of tax money high tech shit, and you can't trace a phone call to get a number? Give me a break.
Lie #3 "I'm sitting here right now scanning your World of Warcraft files"
So let me get this straight, Your sitting on your hairy ass at the LAX In your office with a entire forensics device going through my computer? Isn't that Illegal? Even if so I highly doubt you would be able to get one in your office as scanning for Evidence would be done in a LAB! Even if that is not the case? You got a lunch box device and viewing screen in your office to scan my game files under the pretense charges of "Interstate stalking!" HAHAHAHAHAHA! I mean even when I confessed to raising hell with Crissy I told you where to look and find this shit. And your scanning files which contain absolutely no information regarding her at all??? What you think I'm hiding some Diabolical plot in MPQ files??? Sure, maybe I should just name all my folders "I'm plotting to take over the world" Maybe then you will know where to look as my files were that fucking obvious.
Lie #4 "WE GOT EVIDENCE ON YOU!!! ((2 months later)) After claiming that your preliminary scan revealing nothing" ((This was in January a month after the search warrant expired))
Okay, For 4 months now you have been trying to incite fear, "Were contacting the US Attorney and their going to throw the book at you" For awhile I've known you have been trying to cause fear and panic. Just never showed it to get you to lie more, and looky you have fallen for it. The US Attorney does not take 4 months to charge someone for FRIVOLOUS evidence. If you were really looking to do this shit and charge me you would done it MONTHS ago.
Lie #5 "There will be a Grand Jury involved!"
Oh really, I've done some research pal! Grand Jury is for people who plead INNOCENT, Last time I checked, I confessed to the blogs, the defaced pictures, and the emails back when you stormed my place. Only thing I did not confess to was the alleged "travel plans" which you probably used to pass as your plausible cause to the judge. And guess what, I never did have travel plans or any information on where these fuckers lived. You have my confession on your recording device. Don't you remember sitting there with me in my nice apartment having that nice chat? Oh yeah it was recorded! So this wouldn't go to trial even if your trivial logs managed to get me charged.
Lie #6 "But that was just the initial review"
You shitted out this one back in December when the search warrant ended. I talked with someone who works with the NSA. I even called you out on it and you made a lame attempt to cover it. In reality the Initial review comes after you have been ARRESTED. I haven't even been charged Search warrent said "60 days" Its been 5 months since that expired. And another thing regarding that. The man who told me this also said that if The raid would have been done by LOCAL authorities. Even if that's not the case its still worth looking into.
Lie #7 "What you did was still stalking even if you didn't have travel plans or intentions of carrying out criminal actions against the individual"
How is it stalking when she was also to sending ME messages? HELL! You had a log of one of her messages to me, telling me to come out to LA to further provoke stuff. Not to mention all the pastors she sent my ways, oh hey you got logs of that too! Fail.
Now lets go into your crimes with Grant shall we?
Me and Grant have actually become friends over this. He didn't have any noble things to say about you Mike. I like how you stormed his place with no Search Warrant, just invited yourself in. And then proceeded to ask him if he told me about Crissy's aborted fetuses. (Like thats a crime!) His words next would be the same as mine "your point?" And then you went ahead to threaten him with Jail time for "Conspiracy to hack a web page" Well guess what we never did that either. He just though the idea of it was cool. And you did this little stunt on him Halfway through the search warrant as if you were really scanning my PCs to begin with. I told you were on the hard drive to look for the log of me and Grant talking about that. Wouldn't you already have your evidence against him and me?
Once I get the contact info of your supervisor it will be sent to Grant, He has been looking to file a complaint against you for a long time Hess. He is not a happy man, and your boss certainly wont be either when he hears of the naughty things you have been doing. He told me that you are a friend of Crissy's ex work boss. Which means this was done on your own personal gain to score brownie points with that insecure hypocrite.
The message of this blog is being copy and pasted and relayed everywhere to your boss, to every FBI agent in LA, to every whistle blower, and to anyone with an internet connection incase you try to abuse your authority once more in order to censor the truth about your nature. You can not charge me for Freedom of Speech. First Amendment asshole! I will be making some phone calls tomorrow.
Thanks if you have actually read this far. If not, fuck you.
This all coming from the same epic troll who would later threaten to get trolls partyvanned because of internet stalking, and drag them before the Grand jury. Talk about irony.
But don't take our word for it, we're just lying trolls "twisting around his words." Documents aquired by a proud lulz patriot:
The documents reveal among other things that Robbie's mommy and daddy dropped $50,000 to get their little epic troll back and that he went to therapy. As the existance of this page proves, it didn't do much good to him.
- ☐ Not told
- ☐ Told
- ☑ Knights of the Told Republic
Rika Stiles or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Hate my Dick
Robert proceeded to flounce to save himself from the terrible wrath of the Anonymous, and kept hiding from the internet for a good while. During that time, he decided that boobs would look good on his body (which looks like it belongs to crack-addicted Gollum), and decided he wanted to become a girl. He claimed to have changed his looks after watching Resident Evil: Afterlife and falling in love with another unattainable woman, the main actress of the movie. He even changed his name, basing it on a scene model, Rika LaRouge.
Again, we got to witness how lolcows can sense each other and form hugboxes consisting entirely of lolcows. This too happened in Robert's case, as unlike certain other individuals born and raised in West Philadelphia, rather than spend most of his days on the playground, he decided to befriend Adf-fuensalida and other well-adjusted transsexual individuals.
—This is Robb taking criticism well
That sort of a jolly bunch. Due to a bizarre twist of fate, ADF was rediscovered by the trolls, and Robert got the front seats in the trolling. Luckily for the trolls, Robert is the textbook definition of a bipolar case and changes his tranny friends more often than he changes his socks. For reasons sane people can only wonder, Robert had gotten furious at other minor tranny lolcow and used the wiki about Adf-fuensalida the trolls had set up to attack the tranny he was mad at. The trolls observed with some amusement the internet war he was waging, but didn't bother to interrupt. Content is content. However, soon the other tranny as well discovered the site, and created an article about Robert.
Anally demolished, Robert contacted the admins of the site, demanding his information to be censored. Because, you know, just because he had attacked someone else on the internet, that doesn't give others the same right, right? The trolls laughed at him and his complete lack of self-awareness, and thus begun Robert's crusade against the evil trolls.
—How Robb's anal demolition started
Rage Against the Trolls
Robert, again, sought to disappear from the internet and destroy those slanderous sites telling the dirty truth about him. However, an undercover troll had joined him on skype, leaking delicious details of his hilarious paranoia and delusions for almost two months, without him realizing a thing. Robert had summoned his epic troll DOXing skills, and came to the conclusion he was trolled by a fetish model, a Canadian ginger, and a Russian neo-nazi. He had also gotten together with the old tranny gang, taken screencaps of troll posts, printed the posts and taken them to the police, hoping that they would get charged with e-stalking, cyber harassment, and even hate crimes because when you troll him, it becomes a hate crime because he likes to wear his mom's underwear. Robert had gotten a lawyer who he admitted had Asperger's and planned on getting the trolls, even those who lived on the wrong side of the Atlantic dragged before American court.
Lighter small talk subjects included him mentioned he doesn't mind becoming a 30 years old virgin, because he is asexual. But Robert is very peculiar type of asexual. Unable to get any, he decided that he doesn't want any, either. Sour grapes and all that. He still several times expressed his sexual attraction to his trolls. He also expressed his love for Kacey, a Chris troll widely hated for being a colossal attention whore. Robert also thought that a troll pretending to be his father was his real father, because "he was so convincing".
Later Robert became inactive and deleted his facebook. The trolls assumed he had finally come to his senses and that the trolling, as funny as it had been, had finally come to an end. Or had it..?
Return of the Lolcow: Transtastic Boogaloo
At this point, Robert had been laughed at by only a few trolls who saw the antics and childish infighting of the Philadelphian tranny community amusing. But even this was too much for Robert, and he wanted all traces of his name removed from the internet, fearing that the Stargate and Christian communities he tried to troll back in the days were thirsting for his blood and would track him down. All of this, because some user had said his actual name on an online imageboard in which posts automatically disappear and that is completely unrelated to Christianity and Stargate. At this point, Robert had two possible courses of action. The right one, ignoring the trolls and letting his name be forgotten, which it largely was at this point. And then there was the lolcow one; drawing more attention to himself. Guess which one Robert chose?
He begged the site's owner and user to remove his DOXes. Robert assumed that the people he had attempted to troll long time ago would even remember his "scary" reputation and somehow wander on the site, get his DOXes from a site completely unrelated to Vidya Gaems and come and assassinate him. He tried to play the pity card, and said he was the poor victim of hate he had done nothing to deserve. I mean, just because you tried to DOX the trolls doesn't give them the same right, right?
—Robb's DMCA, met with the expected response
After the hilarious self-contradicting tantrum/guilt tripping attempt, the trolls laughed at him for some weird reason. So Robert did what any sane lolcow tranny would have had done; He declared an e-war. Again. Unless the trolls would remove all information about him, the trolls would be arrested and the troll sites would be forced offline. After he got a scared response from the trolls, Robert paid $300 from his dad's wallet to "Internet detectives" to find out the IPs of his trolls. That all turned out to be wrong. Money well spent. Never mind getting a boobjob or your dick chopped off, hunting trolls is much more fun.
He kept bombarding the threads about himself with empty threats, smugly declaring that he knows where the trolls live and their real names, and that his MMORPG/tranny gang is gonna DDOS the site unless his demands are met. He promised that if only the trolls shut down their sites and removed all information about him, he would never come to the site again. Robert perhaps thought that his presence scared the trolls so that they would want him to leave, but really he offered such great entertainment to the site that no one wanted him to go. The only conceivable effect his crusade was him trying to vandalize the ADF wiki by defacing articles with hate messages to the trolls, to show how totally calm and intimidating he was. Expectedly, his edits reverted in three seconds and his vandalizing attempts were immortalized. Proving that he had absolutely no ability to learn, he posted three entire threads to the bump limit, being completely oblivious to the fact that he was giving the trolls exactly what they wanted. And like a good lolcow, ready to be milked again and again, he couldn't help himself but kept returning with empty threats for some more.
At this point, it was the fifth thread and the interpol's trollbusting department still hadn't picked the trolls up yet, and the sites were only a bit slower due to the lulz-hungry trolls slapping F5s. Robert perhaps finally understanding his utter impotence, sent his final message to the 'chan:
—What was supposed to be his last message
He had learned nothing from those times he had been tricked into "negotiating" with the trolls that resembled an e-circus as everyone kept laughing at his inflated ego and empty threats, ending in him ragequiting. All seemed quiet for a couple of days, after this ED page was published, until Robert came back asking for more.
—Robert, listening to his lawlyer with diagnosed autism
There, he asked the trolls if they had "field agents" where he lives, so that he could have paid them another $300 to destroy his name and proof of him getting trolled in the internet. This coming from the "Warlord Wraith". Oh, how the mighty have fallen!
Robert's offer was met with understandable disbelief, but he insisted on finding an "agent" the trolls had. Playing along with the idea of a nationwide underground troll network existing, the trolls tried to explain to him that what goes to Encyclopedia Dramatica, stays on Encyclopedia Dramatica. Robert kept insisting, telling that he would bribe the article's creator and the ED admin trolls. Then the trolls pointed out what should be painfully obvious to any sane person, that no such thing as "troll agents" existed.
Being much too paranoid to trade money in the internet, he resorted to the well tested tactic of trying to guilt trip the trolls into removing the information about him, because the Anonymous was after him. He then got trolled in the usual fashion, ragequited, told how he is totally unbothered by both ED and the chans and swore never to return. Again.
"It's your fault!"
—Robb declaring the revival of his trollsona to destroy the other trolls
Robert evidently returned for another round of being mocked by trolls. He tried to make the trolls stop with guilt-tripping, and telling how much the people they are trolling are hurting so they know to stop. He whined about his many /L/ threads on 789chan and this ED article, and admitted he had nightmares about it. So far his return reeked of the typical Robb where he claimed that the people who laughed at him have a fixation with him and tried to convince the users that the lulz was over. For the third time.
Then Robb heared that his friend ADF had attempted to become an hero because of Philly tranny circlejerk drama, and saw an opportunity to get the trolls to stop trolling him. He instantly placed the blame upon the ADF trolls, claiming that they were the reason why ADF was the way he was today and even referred them with such delightful descriptions as internet's biggest sadist and cold blooded killer. Robert also tried to get pity points by claiming that he was helping ADF, after kicking him out of his house and raging at him. Which is completely understandable if you have ever seen a picture of the mentioned lolcow, but a rather poor way of getting pity. He even proceeded to brag about having a job that was a couple of steps behind of working at McDonalds, because his parents cut him off for thinking about taking hormones.
After ADF trolls released the screencaps of Robb's interactions online with his manchildren adventure club, The Wolverines, Robert's paranoia and USI kicked in. He threatened the trolls with "Monotov" cocktail, claiming that the Wolverines have been convicted of heinous crimes, asking the trolls all around the world to come to Philadelphia to fight his hiking group of homosexual deviants. Pitying Robb who had forgotten he is a crossdressing midget completely unable to put up a fight, the trolls preferred to DOX his personal army. More rage and threats followed, as so many times before.
Later he begged to be banned because he has the self-restraint of a five year old and couldn't stay away from the site and always ended up getting trolled when he showed up. Mods were unwilling to deprive the users of entertainment and just stood aside and let trolling continue. Robert tried to delete his desperate posts, and then sent some more threats.
Robbie and Ponies - Shit's getting desperate
Robbie went into hiding after the last trolling, but kept lurking the site all the while carefully applying soothing creme on his sore, gaping asshole. He found a thread about trolling 4chan's pony board, and apparently thought he had finally come up with a way to show those trolls. Knowing he could not tackle the trolls alone, Robby now brought to bear the full might of 20 something year old basement dwellers whose sole passion in life is watching a cartoon show about ponies meant for preteen girls.
Or so he thought. He created a thread on /mlp/, trying to make the ponies into his personal army, telling them they could pay back to that 789chan. Even the bronies could handle trolling better than Robbie and couldn't care about some old troll thread, unlike Robbie who got anally devastated for months when he got trolled. After being met with the expected response, the ponies proceeded to go back to fapping to Fluttershy Rule 34.
After noticing no one is interested in joining his anti-troll crusade, he went back to 789chan. Robb sent some angry threats and claimed he had taken pictures of his trolls and their posts revealing a troll conspiracy and would contact the authorities, like some twenty times before. Nevermind that he had threatened a federal agent and even that one police officer who would actually for some unfathomable reason have some sympathy left for him and actually cared to chase trolls would have some hard time detecting IPs from A4 sheets.
Robb also informed the users that he's lived in bars since the article was created. Not that he cares about it. Robb also pointed out that unless everything about him is removed from the sites, ADF will murder his own father with the gun given to him by his trolls.
Robb's Return to 789chan
After a break from the internet, presumably hiding in bars from imaginary trolls and from ADF, he returned to 789chan to make two suspicious threads; One of him posting that he wanted everyone on /cwc/ to quit making fun of him and another of him asking anons if they would fuck him hard. After being met with reasonable disgust from users, Robb started whining at them for making fun of his appearance.
This was followed by DOXing attempt number six and Robert claimed to have dox on a Finnish troll. He revealed what he thought was the Finnish troll's surname; Laajakaista, which is Finnish for broadband internet. Somehow, Robb and his autistic lawyer are going to find that dang Mr. Broadband Internet and drag him out of Finland into American court. He promised if the troll co-operated and DOX'd his fellow trolls, he'd go easy on him, as if the trolls had formed some real life gang to bully internet trannies and actually knew each other. Surely anyone would agree on such reasonable deal, especially when Robbie totally got his DOX this time!
According to Robb, his parents have gone back to supporting him, because they saw this ED page and feel that their special snowflake should be excused for acting like a fucktard, despite the fact that he's a twenty four year old adult. He also proceeded to brag that he's "employed in one of the top corporations in the US". This is correct in the sense that a Mexican cleaning cum from Macs is employed in one of the top corporations in the US.
Robb again begged the mods to ban him, stating that he would never return to 789chan. A couple of hours later, Robb spammed the thread with My Little Pony r34 in hopes that his wish would come true. After not getting the response he wanted, he deleted his posts and went on to fap furiously to his new porn collection. He then later returned only to inform 789chan of how little he cares, and do the same thing all over again. After mods told him he was too hilarious to ban, he begged the trolls to wait, because he could throw another tranny lolcow under the bus if they only stopped trolling him and deleted the archived thread. The exact fucking thing that started Robert trolling in the first place.
As can be assumed, no one was impressed with his trollshielding efforts. He then told he's going to leave the site for the 12th time and proudly declared he's going to get someone to install NetNanny to his computer and block the site from him because he is a childish pathetic tranny completely devoid of any self-restrain. Except even a child learns that putting your hand on a hot stove hurts, Robert doesn't.
—Robert being slightly more insane as usual.
...and of course Robert was back in a few days, as usual, and as his hideous self. Robert also tried to bribe the admin of the site by paying server bills, thus enabling the trolling effort to continue. Like always, if people are unable to troll Robb, he's glad to offer the trolls his help.
Robert blames the board for his dad calling him a failure and a queer when he is in fact a failure and a queer. Robert blames the board for his boss treating him like shit because he's an incompetent dumbass and very obviously is not exactly bright as proven by all his threads. Robert blames the board for the threads and ED page ruining his life even though they're all a tapestry woven entirely by him refusing to stop coming there to yell at the internet to cower before his threats and scary name calling. Robert begs the internet and in the same breath threatens those he is begging. Even if there was someone sitting at a Human Relations desk typing in any possible permutation of his name onto Google, ironically "Robert Wayne Stiles" and "Rika Stiles" pointed to nothing before he had to continue fanning the flames and making more and more people want to see him twist more and more.
The Scars That Never Heal
As he had threatened the trolls for some four months and they still weren't intimidated by his promised swift retribution, Robb did the only logical thing: post some more death threats. He told he had been training as a part of his plan, ready to take on the nazi troll thugs. If the pictures of scrawny Robb in this article aren't enough to make the very thought of Robert harming anyone physically absolutely hilarious, note that even ADF-fuensalida has whooped Robb's ass a number of times, which really says much. One troll, in particular he threatened to shove a shotgun down her cunt on numerous occasions, because in Robb's world, all vaginas are like this. After a few more threats about cutting off dicks and tying innards with a boxcutter, Robb's infamous sexual frustration became obvious once again.
Robb came back to make the guilt tripping attempt number #2154 and threatened to kill himself. And then claimed that the little voice in his head telling him to off himself, the only thing that keeps him from slitting his wrists is the fact that he wants to see the pain on his trolls' faces before he puts them into an unmarked grave. The armchair psychologists of ED, specialized in LOLnomy, can offer Robert a priceless tip, revealed by their groundbreaking studies: If you want to make people feel sorry for you, don't threaten to kill them. Or at least not in the same post.
Shortly after saying "Screw LGBT", Robb tried to enlist the help of a tranny board to destroy his "cisgender trash" e-nemies, only managing to drive up ED hits and make even more people dislike him. Good job Robb, you really handle trolling like a pro.
Then Robert tried to throw the same tranny mentioned earlier under the bus AGAIN, after the board members had told him they aren't interested in some boring posing pics of another tranny when they've got uglier, stupider and more entertaining tranny on the very board. But wait, this wasn't enough fail for Robert. First, he pretended to be his own troll, a somewhat known tripfag on the board. By attempting to copypaste the tripcode, being the only one interested in the tranny he had a bitchfight with, being oblivious to the fact that mods can see IPs and the real tripfag can post any moment he pleases, misusage of internet troll slang, providing nothing and generally acting like a faggot he was instantly exposed as who else than Robert Wayne Stiles. He was rightly called out and more mad ensued.
And as it has been proven again and again and again that Robert has the mental capacity and equal learning skills of an insect, Robert made another trollshielding thread, trying to push another tranny under the bus because it worked so well before. He had included a short audio that was stolen straight from the Cwcki, proudly declaring the whole recording will be released when his threads will be deleted. By now you, unlike Robert, should know how it ended so I am not even bothering to write it.
And just when people thought he couldn't possibly come up with any more stupid shit, he resorted to spamming the chan again and trying to troll the admin by implying he is a gay. Which the admin might've considered insulting if he was a 12 years old boy, around the age when Robert's mental developement halted, instead of a grown up man and a well known flaming homo. Robert was trying to force the admin to remove his threads from the archive so that his faggotry would disappear, and in response some of the more memorable spam threads got archived.
Then completely out of the blue Robb admitted to raping women and 13 year old boys in a cave. After the understandable puzzlement, the trolls began to laugh at the edgy story and Robert recanted with "LOLITROLLU". But after that at the slightest mention of "lol cave", Robert, for some reason, started 'tard raging once again how the chan had ruined his life, although he had made himself into a child-rapist, successfully trolling only himself. As the cherry on top of the cake, Robert in his rage probably forgot that he is still going to court over sending an FBI agent death threats online. Which means, if any legal authority was to take his story seriously, he would be in some deep shit. At least he would be safe from soap related incidents behind the bars.
A day later, he posted as "a friend" and gave 789chan a tl;dr sob story about how he was going to leave the internet forever and how his parents would rather pay for his apartment than deal with him. He also admitted that the reason why he's a tranny is his hope that he would get to put his shriveled dick into a vagina. He also admitted to almost kidnapping a woman because he was far too socially retarded to get one the normal way, but the plan was abandoned. After being called out and the obvious was pointed out, Robb dropped the charade.
Taking Down EncyclopediaDramatica
—Robert trying to infiltrate the trolls, like his rolemodel before him and again expressing his attraction to his trolls.
Robert then realized that it was the ED article that was the source of all his pain, and told it had forced him into Bath salts usage (but not before leaving two Final Messages again). Like a manipulative individual he considers himself to be, he came up with the most clever of all plans: Pretending to be his own troll to make everyone do his bidding! Yes, again.
However, Robb failing to realize that EDiots, unlike him, aren't exactly shitting their pants because of even hypothetically impossible police involvement, he was again exposed. Before being banned, he AGAIN attempted to DOX his trolls and had somehow come to the conclusion that his troll was actually a certain brewery in Finland.
Robert the Playa
Robert, noticing people weren't exactly impressed by his attempts to vandalize his own page and the cave story, tried a new tactic. He wanted to prove the board he had changed his ways by continuing to post there and telling how he had lost his deep-seated virginity. Because everyone in the internet is a permavirgin social retard like him, and that would make him a god-like figure to them, right? Robert told that he had even taken a shower (!) and had met a hot goffik girl who was impressed by his ED article and who hates Christians JUST LIKE HE DOES (story doesn't tell if her parents forced her to go to church as well) and wanted his dick. Quite cool story, huh? As is obvious from the sole fact that his social skills haven't and won't improve by him posting in the chan, Robert is and will remain a sad virgin.
Sad, not because he thinks that actually managing to hide his autism for a few hours and getting some of that poon will make him somehow awesome and different when normal people more or less regularly have sex, but that the first thing he should do is let the internet know that for once he wasn't a complete social retard. Of course in his usual manner he was very poor in hiding his agenda, again trying to get the trolls to stop trolling him since he was one of the cool gais now.
As a detail of interest, as a part of his v-card losing story, Robert wanted to tell he had his first kiss at the tender age of 24. Which means that in real life, at 24, he isn't only a desperate, sad virgin wanting to kidnap women, but a kissless one at that.
And of course, shortly after promising to live happily ever after with his girl and never to return, Robb came back to sperg back about the trolls like nothing had happened. And all was well in 789chan.
Robb proceeded to post pictures of his alleged first fuck, telling the trolls to leave her alone. He revealed that the woman's name is Penelope and soon admitted he had lied about losing his virginity. Of course, after 24 years long string of failures, a woman not being immediately repulsed by him made him immediately fall in love with her and write fapfiction about her to the trolls. Very surprisingly, some days later after meeting Robb, "Penelope" severed all contact with him. Being the charmer that he is, Robb still obsesses over her.
Robb later revealed more about his imaginary girlfriend to 789chan users:
If mentions of medication and hospital staff didn't get you thinking, Robert also felt necessary to mention that "she drooled a fucking lot" and "had a really low IQ", meaning that Robert has stooped enough low to qualify trying to molest a real retard as something to brag about. The funniest part yet is, that he still failed to get laid. EncyclopediaDramatica staff recommends Robb to look into Necrophilia for less challenging lays.
Masta of Disguise
Upon being taunted for his cowardly attempts at becoming a woman to avoid further persecution at the hands of trolls, Robb called himself the master of disguise and boasted to his trolls, how he was able to hide "gloriously" for two years in his woman-suit, though no one was actually looking for him. Robb got amazingly butthurt when they doubted his claims that he fooled many people IRL with his balding woman cosplay and that he could go into espionage if it wasn't for his personality. Robert said he planned to changed his name yet again and escape his evil persecuters by skipping town with his tranny troupe, which include ADF and his underage dominatrix. Sources say they will take the greyhound to Portland Oregon and start their own tranny reserve and Robb will find something to get mad about yet again. Robb's parents will continue to fund their little prodigy's delusions, wishing they had actually stopped by his third year in a two year college.
As it turns out, Robb had no idea what state he was even going to. He first thought he was in the Midwest, but when he was told that Oregon is on the west coast and is no where near the Midwest; He flippantly wrote that he didn't care what the difference was. When a user wrote that they also lived in Portland, Oregon. Robb responded with:
Such a fine example of New Jersey education!
Kickstarter for Robbie's Groceries
As of now, Robb has been cut off and disowned by his parents and is begging on his favorite chan for grocery/bath salt money while still being his vastly unlikeable self and showing no humility to those who are supposed to be helping him.
The fun wasn't over yet. A friend of Robb's came into 789chan's chan, worried that Robb was on the run from the law and was appalled that the Robb who came to stay at his dorm room for a few days wasn't the same Robb that he grew up with. While Robb was at his dorm room, Robb had bookmarked both this ED page and 789chan, which is how his friend got a hold of the 789chan owner in the first place. Other than that, Robb spent most of his time in the dorm room on the computer, smelled like sewage, drinking piss beer, and peeping on women in the showers. Besides sneaking into the women's showers, he wouldn't leave the dorm room, scared that 789chan users would find him. If that wasn't funny enough, Robb apparently moans the name of his trolls in his sleep, possibly dreaming about taking them back to his cave.
Certain incidents when Robb was in high school told a lot about what kind of teenager Robb was. In school, Robb had to be restrained multiple times for acting like a spastic, was targeted for being easily butthurt, wanted to get revenge on his high school bullies, and even punched a couple of girls who made fun of him. Even his high school peers thought that Robb was a special case. Robb even wore around a Naruto headband everywhere in school. Even back in high school, Robb was an easily butthurt, Loveshy maggot with temper problems.
When Robb found out the news of his friend's "betrayal," he shit himself again. Just due to the fact that his friend contacted the 789chan owner in concern for Robb's well-being was enough to declare his truest friend an enemy. As a twist of irony, Robb's friend had thanked the site owner for helping him to break ties with Robb's drama-starting and mooching.
Apparently quickly running out of things to blame other than himself, Robert claimed he has been getting trolled while sleepwalking - nine days after leaving the internet for the millionth time. Robert claimed the trolls has caused his insomnia, rather than his bath salt usage. Everyone else is responsible but him. However, this didn't stop Robb for asking some cash. Again. Because it had gone so well the previous times he demanded money from his trolls.
And when he finally realized (for a while again) that he isn't getting any, he claimed he had TROLLED the site, leaving everyone mildly amused and receiving no funds. Truly his revenges are the worst.
Personal Army: Part Deux
—Before you read the picture below, just try to guess from reading the article how it all ended.
Robbie, unable to process that he's as attractive as herpes, blamed his ban from the tranny board on 789chan, claiming that the tranny board was a 789chan run board and the members of the board were 789chan users. To him, there's a giant 789chan conspiracy on the internet that makes him hated wherever he goes.
He sent more threats towards 789chan users that he was completely unpredictable from sleepwalking that he could get away with cutting people in half with a chainsaw. He also threatened users with his amazing knife skills.
Then came the threats of not only suing 789chan and ADF trolls again, but also suing everyone who had anything to do with this article. If that wasn't bad enough, he claims that he's going to use Chris Chan, Nick Bate, Paul David Smith, Anthony Logatto, Anthony Bapst, Ahuviya Rotem Harel, ADF's girlfriend, and another fat tranny as his own personal more autistic version of the Power Rangers. Gee, these threats sure worked before . . .
Robb vs. Troll; Feces Everywhere
Some surprising information came out when a troll, whom Robb considers to be his greatest enemy, got some information from an anonymous source. According to the source:
- He has gone to a mental hospital 3 times in the past 8 months due to stress from being trolled.
- He lied about being employed.
- Harassed trans event security guards over his belief that trolls were at the event.
- He does full on patdowns to look for cameras or cellphones due to his own paranoia. He even threatened to destroy a person's personal property over it. He even down patdowns to passerbys in the street.
- He was convinced that ADF's own girlfriend was an undercover troll
- He annoyed the Philly police over his paranoia a few times, the cops didn't take him seriously.
- Actually made plans of suing trolls and ED
- Believed that releasing court docs is an arrestable defense.
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Furious over the information leak, Robb contacted the troll and demanded to know the name of the person who "betrayed" him. Unable to get an answer from the troll, Robb blamed him for the reason why he looks like a cheap meth addict instead of placing blame on his bath salt addiction. After threatening to shove glass up the troll's ass and cut off his balls, he threatened to sue The Troll Hunter over his video, because he "never raped anyone outside of their consent." Meaning that he believes that if he yells "surprise sex," he could get away with raping perceived trolls, children, and women in caves. Before leaving for the night, Robb made his most hilarious threat to date; He threatened to drop trou in the middle of a street, take a shit in his hand, light it on fire, and throw it at a car that he perceives to be a troll's car. You, the viewer, are forgiven for being reminded of a monkey in the zoo or of an insane bath salt addict.
Then he completely snapped and went onto 789chan's IRC. He mentioned that he shit all over his apartment floor and even threw feces at the wall in anger, blaming it solely on 789chan. After the 789chan owner threatened to call the cops and tell them about the insane monkey-like man on bathsalts, Robb stated that he cleaned the shit up with Windex and Febreze and threw the bag of shit out of the window.
Then Robb, being the brilliant man that he is, decided that hitting on his trolls again would solve some of his problems and had the hopes that he could turn them against the site owner. He claimed that he would whore himself out to anyone and everyone of them, while dressed as Milla, to get them to stop.
His virginity couldn't have been anymore obvious. Then Robb changed his mind about refusing to fuck the site owner and stated that he would even fuck the site owner to get everything to die down.
Back to his old tricks
Many trolls assumed for a few months that Robert had changed his ways and was finally living a semi-normal life. As it turns out, Robb couldn't stay away from his best friend, bath salts, for long. In another site that focuses on discussing lolcows, Robb made a thread threatening legal action again, demanding to be called Rika again. He also told a riveting tale about how someone stole his tripcode and posted about him getting his act together. Remember, Robb's definition of "never happened" is when he is embarrassed by his past behavior or forgets it on a bath salt binge.
What about his friendship with ADF? Well, after ADF moved to Portland, he broke off all contact with Robb. ADF had grown tired of the caves, the internet drama stirred up by Robb, and the dirty crapped walls. This became painfully obvious to users when Robb never mentioned the punching incident that happened to ADF in a Portland anarchist cafe that happened due to a heated political argument.
Robb, still not learning from past behavior, attempted to blank this article again, using the name of another one of his trolls. He removed the parts of the article that discussed his bath salt usage, his cave adventures, his feces throwing, and his failed attempt at getting his sweet, drooling Penelope to fuck him. Meepsheep was quick to summon her banhammer and used it against the former wraith lord. His blanking can be found here.
ED Staff vs. The Wraithlord; Round 2
Robert Wayne Stiles is only here to vandalize the article: Robert Wayne Stiles. You can help by adding lulz and raeping their talk page to rub it in.
— Somehow ED and trolls have stopped Robb from getting dick for money.
After Robb's new favorite website to go to was MIA, he decided to pay ED another visit. Like a retard who escaped his handler, Robb was confused on what he would do without n0chan. Continuing his long tradition of brilliant trolling with proxies, he used the alias of another one of his trolls to vandalize this page where he referred himself as "Queenofthecunt." Robb then went onto the talk page of this article as an attempt to get ED users to feel sorry that he's not getting any dick for bathsalts. No sympathy was given to the monkey whore. Meepsheep, once again, had to use her banhammer against the Wraithlord. The next account was PleaseStopTorturingMe, how fitting! He used this account to delete the recent pictures of him, because even Robb realizes that's he's still an ugly, Gollum-looking tranny. Robb was banned again from ED.
—Robert's guide to engrish
Being the go-getter that he is, he came back to ED to vandalize this article again to give lulz-hungry ED users another helping of his stupidity. When one user quickly reverted Robert's vandalism, Robb went onto the page accusing the user of giving his trolls free blowjobs, never crossing his mind that ED staff and users revert any butthurt revisionism. Robb then tried to jew the ED staff by bribing them with Mommy and Daddy's money and with sex.
Robb, the Monkey Whore
—Robb, even after having his fill of old and diseased dick, refuses anyone who he suspects of being an online troll.
— Robb, not realizing the irony of his statement
Claiming that trolls ruined any chance he had at photography, turned to prostitution to feed his bath salt habit. He announced to the board about his recent prostitution and whined about how trolls "made him out to be a motherfucking crack whore." When asked about how much he charged for a blowjob and buttsecks, he told them that they "weren't worth a meatspin" and that his fellow whores wouldn't service any trolls either. Robb didn't realize that by definition that prostitutes accepted dick from anything waving money in their faces. The paranoid remarks came afterward over his believe that trolls and their "butch lesbian friends" would rape his already diseased ass in their car. Still not seeing the irony of his statements, accused Crissy Moran of being a prostitute and trolls of being her sex slaves. So far, Robb's virginity status is debatable. If he didn't already lose it to little boys in a cave or Penelope, he lost it in the back of an old man's car.
Not even an hour passed when Robb read the recent ED updates about his whoring activities and began his infamous internet tough guy threats:
Robb, still paranoid that trolls are going to videotape themselves fucking him, announced that he was going to pat down every single customer he has for secret cameras. It was later confirmed that Robb was kicked out of his apartment and blamed his recent homelessness on trolls. Revealing more of why he was kicked out, he revealed that he "acted up" and harassed one of his innocent neighbors whom he thought was an internet troll. That and the news reaching the landlady about Robb's shit-flinging sealed his fate. However, he still had his phone with internet, so all was not lost.
Then came good news for Robb, a anti-fa poster claimed that one of his trolls was a woman involved in a gore film involving two Muslims getting beheaded by Neonazis in Russia. Despite the fact that the blurry image of the woman in the video could've been any woman in Russia or anywhere else, Robb was so certain that the woman was actually one of his trolls, even accusing his other trolls of being advocates for murders for laughing at his claims.
—Robb feigning sympathy for Muslims and thinking about his trolls getting fucked
Reveling in his newfound "power," announced that he was going to expose the supposed crimes of his troll to Wikileaks.
It was recently discovered that Robb decided to change his name to Natalie Mercedes Langley. He then used his new prostitute name to advertise his services on FetLife with the screenname MaggotsInHerCunt. Trolls took numerous screencaps of the page. It was too late for damage control when Robb found out about the recent update.
Robb quickly got into the site's IRC and tried to intimidate his arch-nemesis by claiming that he was punching a wall until his knuckles bleed and pretending that the wall was his arch-nemesis. He even tasted the blood on his own knuckles, claiming the he was pretending the blood was that of his arch-nemesis, and made the claim that he wanted to fuck his vampire friend, a member of the Wolverines.
Robb then moved back in with his parents in South Jersey, where he has to abide by a strict curfew and cannot whore himself out to anybody. His parents, like everyone else, believe that their only son is insane, locked him in his room and even threatened to put him in a psych ward again or a group home. Instead of proving his parents wrong, he continued to scream at his computer, even to the point his elderly father blocked fetlife and threatened to cut down his internet. Seems all too familiar.
Angry that his parents locked him in his own room for the night and that trolls continued to laugh at him, he decided that throwing his shit around again would solve everything. Going into a lot of detail, he told trolls how he was going to shove the shit back in his ass after he sucked on it, pretending it's one of his trolls. Robb then spent the rest of the night flinging his own shit all over his old room and out of the window. Once resembling the room of a nerdy fourteen year old, now resembled an autistic two year old's room. The next morning, Robb showed his parents the dirty crapped room, which they had to clean up.
—Despite flinging shit again, Robb won't accept that he's a sperg
Then came the moment Robb was dreading. One of his friends leaked his aliases and screencaps of their conversation. Robb, seeing that one of the screencaps contained him taking pictures of his slit wrists, wrote this:
For Robb, the greatest thing is not intentionally spreading herpes to his customers, it's telling everyone that he did. Despite threatening ED users with a fake cease-and-desist letter, he admitted to a more serious crime. Though this kind of thing is normal for him. Robb later came back and told everyone that he "doesn't have herpes anymore," because his mother helped him apply the herpes cream on his hard dick. Medicine can hide the symptoms, but Robb's got herpes for life. He later admitted that he fapped after his mom helped him rub his hard dick and admitted his mother's hand felt good. He also believes that if he doesn't admit to his mother his desires to her, that it's not incest
— He's right about one thing, Barbara Chandler never touched her son's dick
Then Robb went onto /cow/'s IRC board, which is nothing unusual. However, he attempted to convince the people there that he was an epic troll boss with a cabal of trolls at his beck and call. After trolls told him that his sweet Penelope was pregnant, Robb attempted to back pedal (use "insane troll logic" as Robb had claimed) and lie his way out of the situation by claiming that Penelope never existed.
After Robb couldn't handle all of the stress, he completely snapped. He threatened to become an hero, again not completely unusual when it comes to Robb. He quickly added that he was going to leave a puddle of blood in his room with a note with one of what he believed to be the address of one of his trolls. Robb believed that if he did this, the cyber police would instantly come looking for his trolls, instead of try looking for him to put him in the psych ward as what cops would usually do in that type of situation.
Then he claimed that he would also take a child hostage at knife point and kill them to have the cyber police take trolls into custody. You can see the intelligence we're dealing with here.
Robb's Brown Shitty Bed
—Robb feeling superior to Chris - again.
With Robb's birthday quickly approaching, Robb made sure to spend every single day tardraging on IRC, trying to deny the existence of Penelope after bragging about giving her the dick and comparing himself with the Beatles. He also tried to get other trolls to go after his irl sworn enemy again. When that didn't work, he threatened to browse the streets to kill his irl sworn enemy and his online enemy too. He threatened run way from his parent's house and rape his sworn OL enemy at gunpoint, stealing his father's pistol.
When it was revealed to him that the person who ran the chan was a better looking tranny, Robb proved how jealous he could really be by attempting to dox the person's boyfriend and threatening to never come back unless the other person doesn't come back on.
Robb also started hinting that his own father was believing that his son "worshiped the internet" and rightfully believed that his son's online habits were unhealthy. His father even believed that one of his trolls was a john from fetlife. In return, Robb was convinced that trolls were "whispering sweet nothings" into his father's ear about him.
After his parent's have caught wind of some of his crazy antics on his birthday, they locked him into his room. He responded by "leaving them a gift" in his room while typing.
Frustrated at his parents, Robb threatened to burn his house down. Not being able to stand the smell of his own room, he escaped his room by throwing his brown bed out of the window and jumping out of it. Then he went to a shed by his house and recorded himself on vocaroo. Then he admitted that he raped Penelope, but attempted to backpedal by claiming that Penelope was just a waifu.
The next day, Robb attempted to apologize by saying that he lost control due to his rage and that everyone should forget the rape statements he made. Robb continued to talk about his Oedipus Complex to IRC users. Revealing more about his insane Oedipus desires, he also implied that he wants to get rid of his own father. Why you may ask? Well, according to Robert, his own father doesn't believe that Robert is his own son, calls Robert a queer whenever he could, and acts like a typical Irish-American dad. We salute you, Wayne Stiles!
After arguing with PaganDeathKnight, Robb told the other lolcow and trolls that he, along with his lackey Zammyslave were the ones who trolled PDK under the name Michael "Moochie" Manna. When trolls asked Robert for proof that he was Moochie, Robert told them that he was going to hoard the content for himself. Not only that, but Robert claimed himself to an epic troll for copying exactly what Chris Chan trolls had done in the past. It remains a mystery if Robb was actually Moochie or not. If he was, it seems like a pretty retarded move to try to include the lolcow he trollshielded in the lolsuit a year ago.
One night, Robb and other IRC users imitated each other on vocaroo. The next night, Rika went back onto IRC pretending to be a member of the Wraith and whined to trolls over his high school days
Robb the Pedophile
|This faggot has child porn on his computer and/or knows where to find it.|
You can help by contacting Federal Authorities.
—Robb implying that he has cp on his computer and/or knows where to find it
Angry that trolls posted up his story on ED, Robb resorted to going to the police again with the Facebook pages of a couple of trolls in order to get his revenge. However, Robb knowing that the police don't care about online trolls, lied to the police about 888chan containing child porn.
When IRC users pointed out that he committed a crime by lying to the police, Robb responded that he would put child porn on the site to get the site shut down. Meaning that he has child porn on his computer and/or he knows where to find it. When users pointed out that he would be the one expecting a date with Chris Hansen and the Partyvan, Robb ranted and raved about how children are ugly and DDOSed the IRC in anger, not helping his case at all.
Unsurprisingly, the cops did show up at his door, but it was to scold Robb for making a false report. Smug that trolls predictions of him picking up another charge for it were untrue, Robb told trolls how he flipped off the cops behind their backs, and pretended that they were Introman. He even revealed that the Wraith did use a similar technique of posting child porn on someone else's Myspace profile.
Robbie even revealed that he fantasies about his fictional teenage character, Janis, and even draws her naked. He even retconned her age to 18 to combat pedophilia rumors. Shortly after denying that she is underage to trolls, Robb later admitted her age.
Robb vs. Red Minus and Asians
—Before the big reveal
Robb's love for his fictional character Janis led to him to fantasizing about the fictional female character in Red Minus' videos, Caxx. Robb imagined that the voice actress animu character was a beautiful, white hipster that he could stick his "ladystick" into. Anyone with the slightest idea of how voice actors are could've told him that voice actors almost never look like their characters. Robb, however, was determined to see what she looked like and got his arch-nemesis to do it, in exchange for one of his chapters.
As it turns out, Robbay instantly lost his boner when his beautiful, white, hipster waifu turned out to be an average looking part-Azn. Robb was extremely butthurt over his lost boner. After it turned out that Red Minus didn't look like his character either and was married to an Asian, Robb decided then that he had to get revenge on Red Minus on the notion that Red Minus was "ruining pop culture and the internet." Robb then used the same website that he fought against before over his own article to make one on Red Minus.
Then Robb came back to IRC again to try to convince IRC users that he has a "womyn" for the thousandth time by claiming that he has BDSM sex with Barbie dolls. Note that this isn't the first time Robbay has shared his love for Barbies either. After making the claim that he has Multiple Personality Disorder and doesn't remember making certain posts, he tried to get information out of his trolls over a possible cartoon he's convinced that Red Minus would make of him. When trolls laughed at him, he threatened to send Red Minus a bomb through the mail and hire an assassion through TOR to go after one of his trolls, after he threatened to get a warrant to get Red Minus arrested. One could guess that Robert went looking for bargain assassins through TOR after he finished jerking off to cp.
Robb gotten into another edit war with another user and was banned for a couple of days. When Robb found out he cried and screamed over the ban.
—If he is that anally distaught over a 2 day ban, imagine how bad his room is going to smell after he flings poo over a permanent ban.
— Reality never was Robb's strong point
After Robb had forfeited his plans towards Redminus. He stolen his parent's credit card in order to get the game Bioshock Infinite. It was then that Robb found his new waifu; Elizabeth. What attracted Robb to this character was her cleavage, her supposed similarities to his imaginary character Janis, and her ability to grant the main character with salts whenever he wanted. Pretty much Robb's idea of the perfect woman.
Poor Robb even became upset that people began linking him to Elizabeth Rule 34, because he did not want anyone else to see his waifu naked. Robb even planned on writing a story in which he kidnaps Elizabeth as a baby. However, he's not a pedo, because he's going to wait until Elizabeth is grown in the story to take down to the cave. He even stolen his own parent's credit card to pay for an Elizabeth figurine. Like with most of Robb's obsessions, this one was bound to crash and burn.
Robb took longer than most gamers to beat Bioshock Infinite and was sore about the Bioshock ending where Elizabeth drowned Booker. In fact, Robb was so angry that he drunk his own piss, while he gave himself a golden shower. To Robb, Elizabeth then was just a way to brainwash horny, basement dwellers like himself to buy their shit and to become Christians. He even believed that the Elizabeth action figure was possessed. He also claimed that he "shattered the illusion" of the game, never realizing that it took him playing the whole game to realize that the game was pandering to losers like himself. Like what happened with Redminus and Caxx, Robb swore revenge on the creator of Bioshock Infinite for petty reasons.
Robb wasn't done being a angry chimp yet. Exiting out of the "Waifu Saga," he entered into what can be described as the "Mommy Saga." It all started when a blurry picture of Robb wearing a fedora at a public event surfaced on Robb's favorite site to go to.
Robb accused the troll of "raping" him, because he felt "so violated" by the picture. He told everyone about how he had been screaming on the top of his lungs, because of the picture. And even threatened to go to the cops again over being photographed at a public event and threatened to tell his parents like a 5 year old and resorted to using death threats against the trolls again. He told them about how he can't leave his room, because of the picture. However, Robb has been a permanent ugly fixture in his room since he moved back with his parents house.
He also tried to get trolls to post the pictures in front of "his mother" and that he claimed that showed her the picture that was posted. After tardraging when trolls mentioned his child porn collection, Robb came back pretending to be his own mother. What gave him away was his spelling, his grammar, and the way he ignored what trolls were telling him. He told trolls about how he threw himself on the floor and was throwing a tantrum. He even mentioned about his involuntary defecation syndrome and about how he gave himself swirlies.
A gallery of mad
—Robb's opinion of this list
Asexual: An adjective Robb uses to describe himself when men and women ignore him for more intellectual company.
Beta (male): Anything that Robb both disagrees with and finds harmless.
Cave: A mysterious natural structure that Robb uses to commit child molestation and/or sexual battery.
Cultured Individual: Someone who partakes in the same activities Robb does. This involves watching Stargate, listening to Insane Clown Posse, playing Skyrim, and barely reading what is online.
Dickvern: Robert's own Sonichu that is half-penis, half Wolverine.
Dick Roll: Dick move
Dominatrix: A type of individual that Robb likes to pretend, despite being physically weak and psychologically gullible.
Feces: A primitive projectile weapon that Robb uses when he is in distress.
Heterosexual: Robb's definition of his current sexual orientation. Changes on a weekly basis.
Illegal: Anything that Robb both disagrees with and finds harmful.
Insane Troll Logic: A logic Robb invented to qualify his illogical demands.
Introman: The catalyst of anything unfortunate that happens within Robb’s life within the last couple of years.
JULAY: Victory cry.
Ladystick: A transsexual man’s penis
Living on (his) own: Formerly used to describe himself living in a apartment funded by his parents. Is now used to describe himself hiding in the shed behind his parent's house.
Master of Disguise: An individual who dresses differently in a harebrained attempt to outsmart enemies. This term is offensive to Robb
Meds: Hard drugs.
Men: Individuals that Robb has some kind of vengeful fixation on. According to Robb, men are only good for currency and spreading herpes genitalis to.
Monkey Whore: A chimp-like prostitute who refers to use feces as their weapon of choice. This term is offensive to Robb.
Never happened: Describes an event that either embarrasses Robb or could give him some legal trouble. This is also known as the common defense mechanism of denial.
Obliverate: A synonym for destroy.
1. Anything kind, sympathetic, or compassionate.
2. see Beta
Rainbow Family: Rika, ADF, Jordman (Thomas "Jordan Gwendolyn" Davis, a tranny who loves to creep in women's bathrooms), etc. They're like a pack of Skittles.
Real Job: Prostitution
Selfish: A characteristic of someone who ignores Robb entirely, does not share Robb’s views, or teases him on the internet. Not to be confused with the actual definition of selfish, which describes Robb perfectly.
Skittle: Member of the Rainbow Family.
Trollshielder: An individual that teases Robb either online or in real life.
Women: Individuals that Robb longs to have sexual interactions with. Due to women not sharing the same beta male interests (see: cultured) nor giving Robb the time of day, Robb considers them selfish (see above).
Womyn: A transsexual man and what Robb uses to describe himself. They are also individuals that Robb considers “superhuman,” despite the obvious contrary. It is also an individual like Robb that feigns knowledge of both the male and female gender, while not understanding their own gender.
We'll seen Robb being unintentionally funny. Well, when he tries to be funny, he's unsurprisingly unfunny. This is especially true when he tries to write parody songs. Take this fine example of lyrical genius:
He lumbers around in skirts and plaid shirts.
He looks like dirt and is always butthurt.
He is physically unfit and smells like SHIT!
He doesn’t look like a lady, and cries like a baby!
If you see this walking turd, be sure to flip him the bird!
He always lies, and he is surrounded by flies
He doesn’t wear underwear, Not even a thong!
He will probably cut his wrist when he hears this song!
- Train noises*
Here comes Thomas the Tranny Engine, The fat yellow train that couldn’t!
- Crashing noises with train noises*
I think he just fucking derailed!
— Robb believing that everyone is jealous of him getting fucked by "HOT" old men.
In late March 2013, Robb shared horrific details about his sexcapades in IRC in the hopes of making the trolls leave in revulsion.
<Natalie> he was 74 but looked 65
<Natalie> and he told me for 50 he'd go anal
<Natalie> and my ass pleasured his most delicious manly cock that stretched 5 inches
<Natalie> into my anal canal
<Natalie> he was really strong for a grimy old fucker
<Natalie> and his beard tickled my lady stick
<Natalie> and it felt good too
<Natalie> infact it helped me ejaculate
<Natalie> my sucky was just as powerful as his
<Natalie> and i pressed my hands against his chest as he breathed ever so heavily
<Natalie> i thought he'd have a heart attack but i kept on pushing
<Natalie> i licked his neck to finish it off
<Natalie> i said i was part vampire just to fuck with joseph
<Natalie> and i plinged my teeth into his flesh leaving a ripe hicky
<Natalie> i hope you enjoyed that you introman, theres plenty more
<Natalie> I THINK YOU FUCKING WANT TO HEAR MORE
<Natalie> THATS WHAT YOU WANT
<Natalie> THIS IS GOING ON ED
Having not learned from his previous slipup, Robb later described an encounter he'd had at his apartment in Philly.
<Natalie> you are never hearing anything about that night
<Natalie> half of them don't remember anything
<Natalie> since i roofied them
<Natalie> they crawled over me like flies on honey
<Natalie> julia heaved her heaping flesh onto my sexy body
<Natalie> she told me she was wasted out of her mind and she wanted to get funky
<Natalie> i started by lifting up her dress and feeling around until she told me to let her do the same
<Natalie> she pounced on me like a fucking tigress
<Natalie> snarling and taring at my flesh
<Natalie> i let her dominate me for one go round
<Natalie> i was in her captivity
<Natalie> but i did not have stockholm
<Natalie> i knew i would commit a revolution and have her flat out
<Natalie> she took me and spank my bottom and giggled
<Natalie> she flipped my hair mounted me and got behind
<Natalie> and squeezed the juice of pure sex right out of my tight buttocks
<Natalie> i licked her face and allured her into laying down her defences
<Natalie> and pounced, i got her on her back and fired a piston of pure feminine love into her mouth
<Natalie> she licked it, and began mosaging my tits
<Natalie> i felt her neck
<Natalie> i breathed harder
<Natalie> i dug my finger nails into her flesh and told her "your empire has grumbled m' lady and i am the usurper
<Natalie> you made me say this shit
<Natalie> it is my only weapn against you
<Natalie> i will make your mind explode with pure decedence
<Natalie> ok shit i have dinner
Robb gets SASSed
After being told how much of a fucking faggot he was by the goons, he went crying like a fucking bitch to SASS (Something Sensitive, the "permabanned pantshitters" club for ex-Goons), whining like a fucking faggot about some shitty webcomic called Shredded Moose (whose own creator thought it was so full of fail they have disavowed any connection to it) and hoping the tranny hating skinheads of SSS would give his cock taking ass some pats and side with him against everyone who wronged him on SA.
They instead responded by mocking the fuck out of him by asking if his daddy raped him, telling him he was a sad faggot who needed mental help, and that he needed to get off the internets and quit shitting it up with his faggotry
This made Robb more butthurt than all greasy old cocks he takes up the ass on a daily basis where he ran screaming back to his shitty blog, crying about how yet another corner of the internet told him he was a disgrace to humanity.
Some butthurt Tumblrtard decided to expose Robb's latest e-identity due to hating his bullshitting on trying to make a shitty webcomic (which is little more than a futile attempt to extend his internet Micropenis ), and Robb, being the sensible human being he is, declared a LOLsuit.
Robert and the real doll
In late January 2015, Robert returned out of nowhere with a new plan. Seemingly angry that the focus of attention had shifted away from him, Robb decided to try and seduce Peter Coffin away from his "wife" Ashleigh in order to finally get some of that sweet poon. Unfortunately for Robb, he outlined his plan in its entirety for all to see. When anons informed him that Coffin had been actively stalking the threads and would see his cunning plan, Robb threatened to DDOS the thread before slinking off butthurt yet again.
After getting laughed at some more, Robb claimed that he had gotten The Wraith back together. One can only expect more profanity-laden shit posts and rape maps for online games to be forthcoming. He also took the time to point out that he had a dog to deal with the trolls, since he's still convinced they'll show up on his doorstep at any time. Not long afterwards, Robert finally admitted to doing meth and bath salts. He also admitted to getting it on with Jordan, the tranny whom he'd tried trollshielding behind. Said trollshielding is what got this crazy ride going in the first place. Up until that point, he had denied both of these things. Robert also admitted to being on other drugs, which would explain his sudden openness. It was around this time that it was also revealed that Robert had gotten himself kicked out of his sugar daddy's house for throwing a fit about the trolls and trashing the place. Upon further prodding, Robert accidentally revealed that he had to move back in with his parents once again now that his meal ticket was effectively taken away.
The Goblin and the Spoon
Determined to live "the sexy life", Robert embarked on his latest chemical excapade: "spoons." In March of 2015, a video surfaced of an obviously drugged-out Stiles. He came onto the board and threw his typical tantrum about being photographed in public. In the midst of this, it was revealed that Robert had taken to shooting heroin, which he refers to as "spoons". How someone with his impulse control has managed to avoid overdosing and ending up on a slab is anybody's guess.
In May of 2015 came the revelation which everyone knew was coming yet all hoped wouldn't: Pictures of Robert's "ladystick" were released. It seems that an anon was able to take advantage of Robert's extreme gullability (which is on par with one of his personal heroes) and convinced him to share some rather disturbing images. With this horror came the revelation that Robert had taken these abominations in a public restroom. This leads one to wonder how long it will be before our hero is caught exposing himself in public. Robert then went on to prove the pics were indeed of him by engaging in massive damage control.
"Um because she has class and is not some filthy craigslist whore"
"Natalie has never had fat thighs like that!"
"FUCK EACH AND EVERY FUCKING ONE OF YOU MOTHERFUCKERS!"
Whatever helps you sleep at night, Robert
"My asshole is NOT loose and I am not Rob"
Robert the dogfucker
— Leave it to Robert Wayne Stiles to admit something like this out of the blue.
After laying low for several weeks, Robert returned in the midst of a bender, revealing that he'd decided to join such luminaries as Jonathan Niehus and Sarah Butts in admitting that he'd fucked a dog named Lauren. In addition to this degeneracy, Robert was led to believe that the CP he'd previously downloaded to his computer might come back to haunt him. Thus, he attempted to delete it by first removing important system files from the computer (which was revealed to belong to his parents) and then using I Can't Believe It's Not Butter on the modem. Convinced that trolls were once again on his trail, he fled the house and slept near a canal. One can only imagine his parents' horror when they got home and discovered what he had done to the family computer. Later on, he offhandedly admitted to raping a second dog, making him a truly sick fuck
My name is Rika, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are gynophobic cisgender, transphobics who spend every second of their day trolling us Philadelphia trannies. You are everything bad online. Honestly, have any of you ever taken hormones? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to my many pictures in this thread.
Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I am a freelance photographer, and a perfect trap. I also lead an FBI investigation against you guys, and have a snake around my neck (It just cost me $4 of my parents' money, shit was so cash). You are all bullies who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my snake
- Robb threads 1-25 archived
- Robb thread 26
- Robb thread 27
- Robb thread 28
- Robb thread 29
- Robb thread 30
- Robb thread 31
- Robb thread 32
- Robb chatlogs archived
- Robb Soundboard
- His YouTube account
- Robb's rectally demolished blog about Christians
- ...and another one
- His twitter
- His okcupid profile
- His MySpace (FUCK OFF MEN)
- Robert's unfunny wikipedia vandalizing account
- His photography website (UltraVPhography) which he uses to lure in potential rape victims.
- His business ModelMayhem Account.
- And his business Flickr Account.
- FB page for his photography.
- Streisand Effect
- Nerd Rage
- ADF-Fuensalida - Robert's IRL
friend enemy friendenemy and a lolcow colleague.
- Unwarranted Self-Importance
- Dear Cis People
- Unlimited disposable income
- New Jersey Where it's from.
- Philadelphia Its current nesting area.
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