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    Purple Aki

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    Hello boys! Let me feel your muscles, boys!


    —Purple Aki's cry. When you hear this, you are fucked.

    It's a flying purple child molester.

    Purple Aki (real name Akinwale Arobieke) is a semi-mythical figure who haunts the darker regions of England and Wales. A bit like Freddy Krueger - if Freddy Krueger was an XBOX HUEG nigger bodybuilder with a fetish for feeling the muscles of young boys.

    The Legend Of Purple Aki

    Standing over six foot, six inches tall, weighing over three hundred pounds and built like a brick shithouse with skin so dark he appeared to be purple, which is how he got his name, Purple Aki was said to approach young men and boys in the street, usually outside of gyms and leisure centres, calling to them with his trademark pickup line of "Hello boys! Let me feel your muscles!" in a strong African accent.

    Sometimes, he would make the boys do squat exercises or otherwise exert themselves for his sexual pleasure, claiming that he was a talent scout on the lookout for future bodybuilding champions.

    If the boys refused, however, Purple Aki would become a ferocious figure, threatening them with violence and chasing them. When he caught up with them, he'd force them up against a wall and whisper in their ear, "Pop or slash?"

    If the boy answered pop, he could look forward to a bit of the old anal rape, whereas if he answered slash, he'd end up with the initals P and A carved into his buttocks with a knife, to let everyone know that they were Purple Aki's property. And THEN a bit of the old anal rape.

    It was said that Purple Aki would stalk his victims for days after the assaults, gathering personal information about them - such as where they lived, where they went to school, their parents' car's license plate number – and jotting it down in his 'stalker’s manual' along with his victim's body measurements, so that he could always track them down easily and return to them for future bumrape.

    Although the stories of Purple Aki's crimes began in Liverpool, they quickly travelled fast across the country and, indeed, Purps was widely considered to be an urban legend in England, a sort of predatory homosexual bogeyman. After all, with such an outlandish story of such a seemingly improbable person, he could only be the product of the overactive imaginations of children.

    That is until his capture by Mersyside police in 2001.


    File:Purple Aki.png
    Purple Aki on his way to court.

    On Sunday 15 June 1986, a 16-year-old boy was electrocuted at New Brighton railway station, allegedly while running away from our hero, Purple Aki who was threatening to 'burst his bottom'.

    Aki was convicted of his manslaughter, but successfully appealed the conviction on the grounds that he had not acted unlawfully by 'standing on the platform and looking into trains'. In addition, Purple Aki was awarded £35,000 compensation due to alleged racial overtones in the prosecution case. It is speculated that he spent the entirety of this on baby oil and shotacon.

    A shameless recidivist, Purple Aki appeared again in court on 22 November 2001, pleading not guilty to fifty counts of indecent assault and harassment against fourteen 13-year-old boys between February 1995 and September 2000. He was convicted of threatening behavior and was jailed for thirty months.

    When he was released in 2003, Purple Aki resumed his activities as normal and was quickly arrested again and charged with fifteen counts of harassment and sexual assault. During the course of the trial, 123 people were interviewed by police about Purple Aki, including one family who were forced into the Witness Protection Programme as a result of threats made by our hero. This lead to Purple Aki being additionally charged for witness intimidation.

    On the 15th of December 2003, he was jailed for six years by Preston Crown Court, pleading guilty to the charges. During the court case Arobieke made an apology to his victims and admitted that he was "infamous, notorious, everything from a bogeyman to whatever." He did, however, make this apology while wearing a massive trollface.

    You are a danger to young men and your behaviour is both strange and obsessive.


    —Judge Slinger, sentencing Purple Aki.

    Arobieke became sexually aroused while forcing terrified young men to perform 'inverted piggybacks' – ordering them to squat so he could lean over their backs with his face by their buttocks and his genitalia on their necks, while squeezing their quad muscles.


    DC Patrick Kilgannon, on Purple Aki's perverse activities.

    he was a tall lad but never muscley, a proper bo weirdo! i watched him getting battered outside the springy chippy (thatto heath) he prayed on vunerable lads but had no boundries, no one bothered him, he used to say he would bring some lads down from tocky to do us in if we messed him about, then he,d walk off proud with a back full of greenys lol, he is deffo touched.


    —The damning testimony of one, Kredda, taken Local Legends.com

    I've heard that if you say 'Purple Aki' three times while looking into one of those extra large poser's mirrors at the gym he suddenly appears behind you...


    —Captain Duff

    Release and Subsequent Rearrest

    The old media reports on Purple Aki.

    Purple Aki was later released on license from prison after three years and was banned from touching, feeling or measuring muscles, asking people to do squat exercises in public and loitering near schools, gyms or sports clubs. This made Purple Aki a sad panda and he attempted to have the ban lifted, but was unsuccessful.

    Not one to let the law stand in the way of him doing what he loved, on May 25th, 2007, Arobieke approached a man in a shopping centre in Preston and commented upon the size of his biceps before 'touching them without permission'. He was arrested shortly afterward on suspicion of breaching his Sexual Offences Prevention Order and remanded in custody. He was later jailed for a further fifteen months with the muscle touching ban being made permanent.

    Purple Aki was released from prison in 2010 and is currently at large in Wales, roaming the valleys in search of supple young boys. They say, that on quiet nights, you can hear his voice on the wind - a cry that chills the marrow in your bones... "Hello boys!"


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