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    Patrick McHenry

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    Partying with hardcore lesbians? That's not the way to get laid. Then again, being gay means you don't care anyway.
    File:Patrickmchenrylesbians 2.jpg
    More partying with lesbians.
    File:Murphypolice.jpg
    Pat's good friend Glenn Murphy got in a little trouble too
    File:Photos-clproseted-gapry-poprls.jpg
    More Gay Pride EmbarrAssment cumming up soon

    Patrick McHenry is a Republican Congressman from the 10th District of North Carolina, USA, and rather a young man, only 32. His district is said to be one of the most "conservative" in the country, which is another way of saying that 99% of the population are redneck hillbilly ex-Baptists who never finished high school, live in trailers, have a part-time job at a meth lab, and have lost 11 or 12 teeth through poor dental hygiene (or it is presumed so to elect such a retard). Like most Republicans, McHenry has obediently followed the wise words of elder statesmen like Tom Delay during his time in Congress, and has returned the favor with many a reach around in his professional career. Like most Republicans, he has also vigorously opposed any legislation that would grant basic American rights to disgusting queers and their amoral agenda. This took tremendous courage, as McHenry himself is a disgusting queer (like most Republicans), though nobody is supposed to know this about him.

    McHenry is also infamous for loving to call soldiers "Two Bits", which is approximately the price McHenry would pay for super special Congressman fun time with said military members. He also loves to pretend he is a mustachioed reporter on occasion, recording himself in war zones and subsequently providing information for terrorists to attack again. Reports say it was a lover's feud.

    In newer news, McHenry was photoed having fun homogay parties with known Lesbians, despite recently claiming he was a hardcore pro-family anti-homosexual nutcase. Yay!

    Some of the tl;dr but amusing background drama!

    • In August, 2007 the bodies of Republican political consultant Ralph Gonzalez, 39, president of "The Strategum Group," his roommate David Abrami and "a friend," Jason Robert Drake, were found in the house of Ralph Gonzalez.
    • Gonzalez served with the Republican Party of Florida's House Campaign Division and executive director of the Georgia Republican Party and counted the Alabama Republican Legislative Committee as a client, producing an anti-gay flier accusing a Democratic candidate of supporting marriage equality.
    • A newspaper, Florida Today, reported that there were signs of a struggle, printing "Lovers' fight may have sparked three deaths" as its headline.
    • Republican Congressman Patrick McHenry has ties to Gonzalez and Drake, the latter was determined to be the shooter in the murder-suicide.
    • McHenry's office initially denied knowing Drake but confirmed later that McHenry did know him, but refused to specify the nature of the relationship.
    • Drake was also tied to a gay escort service in Virginia; the prostitution angle -- and who it extends to -- is a bit murky at this point, with few sources on the record.

    The people and relationships involved are almost too convoluted to follow; here's more:

    • Patrick McHenry is also affiliated with outed former National Field Director of the Republican National Committee (RNC) Dan Gurley (Gurley by name, like McHenry girly by nature: amirite?). According to NC Conservative, McHenry "owes his seat to Dan Gurley" -- with Gurley working with Drake on McHenry's behalf.
    • McHenry's a good friend of the former National Young Republican Chairman, Glenn Murphy. Yes, that Glenn Murphy -- the one arrested for sexually assaulting a sleeping man, performing oral sex on him (see pic from police report). McHenry supported him for the National Young Republican Chairmanship.

    Scandal!

    Controversy

    McHenry buys house with live-in boyfriend, spooning afoot

    File:Deed.jpg
    Deed to the party-pad

    It was recently disclosed that McHenry bought a house in Washington DC, which he co-owned with his boyfriend-at-the-time Scott! Then he took an illegal tax deduction!

    US Congressman owned home with another man, took DC tax deduction while voting in NC

    Congressman Patrick T. McHenry (R-NC) purchased a residence in Washington, DC's Capital Hill neighborhood with another man. While he owned the home, McHenry and co-owner Scott G. Stewart claimed eligibility for the District of Columbia's Homestead Tax Deduction, a tax reduction program to encourage homeownership and residence in DC. At the same time McHenry was registered to vote, and did so, in Gaston County, North Carolina.

    McHenry calls soldier "Two bit", does not replicate full song

    Patrick McHenry embarassed 10th district voters by calling a security guard preventing him from entering a gym in Baghdad a "two bit", failing to replicate the entire couplet, and essentially embarrassing himself and further reinforcing the reason he never graduated from music school.

    McHenry attempts to be Geraldo Rivera, fails to grow mustache, kills three in the process

    According to Untrustworthy sources of a false nature:

    Later April 9, Daily Kos reported that Patrick McHenry's video may have potentially caused three deaths inside of the Green Zone[12], citing a Huntsville Times article releasing information that the prior Sunday (April 6th), only a day after Patrick McHenry's Iraq video was posted, three soldiers were killed in the very same gym McHenry was barred from[13], the location of which McHenry made clear in his video. Daily Kos claims McHenry's violation of OPSEC may have aided insurgents in attacking this gym, resulting in the deaths.

    In this way, Patrick McHenry has won the award for being the person you would least like to play Battleship with you, as his habit of taking photographs of your board and giving it to the opponent render him a useless tactician in naval warfare.

    Lance Sigmon tears McHenry supporters apart, wrestles bear onstage

    See also

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