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From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Pandas are God's worst creation. Pandas are the definition of worthless. Pandas refuse to fuck each other. Even when they do find the time to mate, their offspring spend months blind and especially worthless. For some stupid, fucked up reason, pandas only eat bamboo which is a foodsource their teeth are not designed to cope with. As such, many pandas die of malnutrition, because they won't man up and eat some fucking meat. Pandas bring great shame to bear famiry.

Since Pandas have the digestive system of a omnivore [1] but choose to go on a bamboo only diet[2], Pandas are nature's way of saying that vegans are pussies.

Azns love Pandas

Azns have spent entirely too much time keeping pandas alive. In fact if it wasn't for their efforts we probably wouldn't even have to hate on the worthless god forsaken creatures. Their sins include; Making it a crime to kill Pandas, Keeping them safe in cages, and helping them in any way they can to mate (God damn furfags). They've made Panda porn in feeble attempt at helping Pandas procreate, but as we all know they're too fucking dumb and gay to want to do such a thing.

The panda is, unfortunately, virtually unsavable. It lives in the most overpopulated country inthe world, it feeds on plants when it ought to be eating partially meat, it transfers all sorts of nasty diseases among itself, it tastes nice and it's got a coat that looks good on someone's back.


Why it is good to kill and eat pandas

"The xenomorph has concentrated acid for blood."
"Chinese researchers take care of twin giant panda cubs at the China Giant Panda Protection and Research Center in Wolong, southwest China's Sichuan province, July 9, 2005."

Some argue that if we ate pandas, we'd be doing them a favour as an enterprising Chinese farmer would doubtless find a way to force the frigid fuckers to breed, to produce more meat and make more money. The panda is the only animal that gets cuter as it grows up and becomes a used up whore.

Serving suggestions

Pedo-Pope Rancid-er & pandas

Pandas are popular items in Malta to deface billboards of the Pope with. Why anyone would deface the image of the Holy-See with such a crappy example of God's creation is beyond me. Stupid panda-lovers! They do not know anything.


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