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Mr. Saari

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This page contains an hero.
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Matti Juhani Saari,
codename Wumpscut
Nationality: Finland  MiniflagFinland.png
Highscore Killed 10, injured 3 (1 of which nearly died)
Top 25? Yes, #1 in Finland
Style Single player
An Hero? Yes
Motive: Autism, hatred for humanity, bullying (at least according to the Finnish media), simply for teh lulz

This article is about the school shooter. For the Finnish porn star, see Henry Saari. THE FINNISHER: RELOADED

Matti Juhani Saari, is was a 22-year-old Finn who became an hero and the new Finnish champion on September 23rd, 2008, beating Pekka Eric Auvinen's Finnish record from 2007. Matti Saari (codename: Wumpscut) shot at least 10 unarmed girls at the School of Hospitality, a vocational college in Kauhajoki. Some old media first reported that he was still alive, but he managed to beat the game. He is considered to be the most famous Finn in over 9000 years, other than the Moomins.

Just like his idol Pekka Auvinen, he posted similar YouTube videos some days before. According to Finnish old media the local police had interrogated him on the nature of the videos just the day before but decided not to confiscate his weapon. JewTube deleted his videos a few hours after the shooting because people from a certain online community started viewing them.

He managed to get ten frags and three wounded, a new Finnish record! Original research showed that it was due to disappointment in the Olympics, unfortunately, school shooting is a national American Sport, not an Olympic sport. Some argue that Matti was inspired by two Finnish Olympic heroes, shooting medalists Satu Mäkelä-Nummela and Henri Häkkinen. Other old media reports states 11 casualties, putting Matti Saari on the 7th place on the all time leaderboards. Bonus points go out for trying to burn down the school.

File:Feenland.jpg
Mr. Saari has done his part in promoting the recognition of Finland throughout the world.
School BRB

YouTube Channel

Like all modern an heroes, Matti had a YouTube channel. A few days before the shooting he uploaded some videos of him shooting. The police interrogated him because of that, but decided he's the right kind of a guy to be carrying lethal weapons.

Wumpscut86
Joined: March 14, 2008
Last Sign In: 3 hours ago
Videos Watched: 3,774
Subscribers: 42
Channel Views: 66,410


Name: Mr. Saari
Age: 22
And suddenly there was war we didn't remember it
A long time forgotten there suddenly was war
And suddenly there was war our children are dead
Burnt in the ruins that were left by war

War

And suddenly there was war and the mothers they screamed
For revenge and reprisals for another war
And suddenly and suddenly
And suddenly there was war with spoiling and death
And you fight alone if there's another war

Whole life is war and whole life is pain
And you will fight alone in your personal war

War

This is war!
City: Kauhajoki
Country: Finland
Interests and Hobbies: Computers, guns, sex and beers.
Movies and Shows: Horror movies like Saw 1-3, The Grudge, The Shining etc.
Music: Eisbrecher, Scar Symmetry, Soilwork, :Wumpscut:, Gloria Morti, In Flames, Rammstein, Metallica, Kiuas, Turmion Kätilöt etc. 
MySpace


Internet dating

File:SaariYT.jpg
Jewtube screencap

It seems like Matti Saari was trying to date online. He listed his interests as "computers" and drums. On his YouTube profile he listed computers, weapons, beer and sex as his interests. (There is no evidence that he ever had sex with anyone other than his mitten).

Google translation of his online dating profile:

wumpscut86 - 22 years old, Male, hometown Erode
The man Offline - the last on-line mode, 23.08.2008 22:54
Profile Photos Guest Book
Heipä hey!
Please contact your profile

Length 172 cm
Weight 70 kg
Eye color blue
Hair: Brown
Bodily structure Normal
Children No Children
I want children I do not
Marital status Single
Sexual orientation Hetero Sexual
Occupation Student
Commuting Students
ANNUAL 0-10 000 €
Ethnicity Suomalainen
Astrological Sign: bullfighting
Province of South Ostrobothnia
City or county Howick


Heipä hey!

Hobbies
Shooting (Walther P22 Target <3), computers and drums.
Musical taste
Mostly heavier music I listen, but everything goes.
Cinemas
Horror of horror.
Dress Code
I do not follow fashion
Tenure
Alone
Pets
Cat

In an ideal partner
Female Sex
Age 16-25
Length 150-180 cm
Weight 50-85 kg
Children No Children
I want children I do not
Marital status Single
Sexual orientation Hetero Sexual
Province of South Ostrobothnia
City or county Howick

Evidence of being a retard

Last Thursday, the Finnish police have released a report titled "Laboratorioanalyysijatodisteidenpsyykkinenhäiriövuonnasaari" (the Finnish word for "Laboratory Analysis and Evidence of Mental Disorders in Mr. Saari"). In the report, Mr. Saari was deemed legally retarded; the reasons cited were:

  • Mr. Saari liked "Saw"
  • Mr. Saari liked "Saw II"
  • Mr. Saari liked "Saw III"
  • Mr. Saari was swedish

The fact that Mr. Saari did not mention liking "Saw IV" or "Saw V" was not considered mitigating evidence, as those films were made after 2005, and no movies reach Finland until 5 years after they opened in American theaters.

Videos


Me and my Walther P22 Target

You Will Die Next

A Tribute Video

News coverage that contains a bit of his walther p22 target video

a parody video

Graded Score

Graded score
Kill count: 10/20 (11 Injured)
Accuracy: 18/20
Style: 15/20
Butthurt: 18/20
Bonus: 19/20
beat his fellow Finnish Friend's score.
Total score: 80/100 (B-)
Nothing special. Buried and forgotten.
See full ranking


Wanted Level:
___________________

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___________________

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Vice Squad


See Also

External Links


Gallery

Mr. Saari is part of a series on Education

[Drop OutGo To School]


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Mr. Saari is part of a series on HSTButton.png
[Game Over][Insert Coin]
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Ranked Mode (Single Player)

Adam LanzaAnders Behring BreivikAndrew KehoeAriana Grande MassacreBaruch GoldsteinBrenton TarrantCampo Elías DelgadoCharles Whitman's TumorCho Seung-HuiDevin Patrick KelleyFort HoodJack Gilbert GrahamJames HubertyJeffrey DahmerLuby's massacreMartin BryantMutsuo ToiNice Truck Attack 2016Omar MateenPatrick CrusiusReina Nightclub MassacreSagamihara StabbingsShinji AobaStephen PaddockTed BundyVladislav RoslyakovWoo Bum-kon

Casual Mode (Single Player)

Aaron AlexisAlexandre BissonnetteAli David SonbolyAnton Lundin PetterssonAurora Theatre ShootingBreda Highschool MassacreBreitscheidplatzBruce Jeffrey PardoCapital Gazette ShootingCharles BishopChris Harper-MercerConnor BettsDallas Sniper AttacksDavid KatzDavid Malcolm GrayDavid LongDeath to Traitors, Freedom for BritainDerrick BirdDeWayne CraddockDimitrios PagourtzisDmitry VinogradovDylann Storm RoofElliot RodgerÉric BorelGabe ParkerGeorge SodiniGian Luigi FerriJames Alex FieldsJared Lee LoughnerJason DaltonJason RodriguezJaylen FrybergJeff WeiseJesse OsborneJiverly VoongJoe StackJohn Russel HouserJosef FritzlKhalid MasoodKimveer GillKip KinkelLam Kor WanMamoru TakumaMarc LepineMark BartonMark EssexMatthew de GroodMichael CarnealMichael Kenneth McLendonMichael RyanMikese MorseMr. SaariNghtmrchld26Nikolas CruzPekka-Eric AuvinenPennsylvania School StabbingRamadan Van ManRandy StairRobert BalesRobert BowersRobert HawkinsRobert SteinhäuserSantino William LeganSayfullo SaipovSaint Petersburg Metro bombingThe Twinkie ManThomas Watt HamiltonTim KretschmerTJ LaneTrystan Andrew TerrellUnabomberWade Michael PageZhao ZeweiZug Massacre

Co-Operative Mode

1-14 Jakarta AttacksBoston Marathon BombingCharlie HebdoColumbineHiroshima and NagasakiJews did WTCPearl HarborSan Bernardino shootingSandniggers in ParisSri Lanka Easter BombingsTimothy McVeigh

Sid Meier's Civilization

Adolf HitlerAugusto PinochetCharles MansonHeaven's GateHolocaustJonestownJoseph StalinKim Il-sungMao ZedongOsama bin LadenPol PotSaddam HusseinWacoWorld War II

Banned From Scoring

Asa CoonBilly MitchellBrian Isaack ClydeJohn EarnestLogan ClarkNasim AghdamSam HydeSol PaisTodd RogersWilliam Atchison

 
Mr. Saari is part of a series on Psychopaths
3g1h-phone3.jpg Spree/One-time Killers:

Adam LanzaAnders Behring BreivikCasey AnthonyGerry McCannCho Seung-HuiTyler PetersonMark EssexDylan KleboldDylann Storm RoofEric HarrisMaurice ClemmonsAaron AlexisBruce Jeffrey PardoElliot RodgerGeorge SodiniJiverly VoongMalik Nadal HasanJared Lee LoughnerJeff WeiseJoe StackJosef FritzlJason RodriguezMartin BryantMatthew de GroodMatti SaariMatthew MurrayPekka-Eric AuvinenWade Michael PageTheodore "The Unabomber" KaczynskiTim KretschmerTJ LaneRobert HawkinsRaoul MoatAlex Hribal

Career/Serial Killers:

Charles MansonChris BenoitHitlerMao ZedongJack the RipperJames HolmesRichard "The Iceman" KuklinskiTed BundyJeffrey Dahmer

Terrorists:

Al-QaedaDzhokar TsarnaevTamerlan TsarnaevOsama Bin Laden

See also:

Antisocial personality disorderParanoid personality disorderSick fuckMurderJewsPolice Brutality

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Mr. Saari
is part of a series on
An Heroes

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Failures

Crystal ShinkleDylann Storm RoofJeffree MoonLolo FerrariOperation YewtubeOwen WilsonPogoRooRex FowlerSirtom93The Great Sonic-cide of 2007Toaster SteveTumbles the Stairdragon

Died Alone

Aaron SwartzAcidChanAdam LanzaAdolf HitlerAlan TuringAmanda ToddAn HaloStephanie Michelle BrownAndrew KoenigAsa CoonBob8466Brandon CrispBrigit Lorena GonzalezBroady Paul LedetBruce "Satan Claus" PardoBudd DwyerCandyjunkieCharles BishopCharmaine DragunChris BenoitChris DornerChristine ChubbuckChristopher FosterCho Seung-HuiCodey PorterDavid RitchesonDennis AvnerDustin MichaelsDylan KleboldEmma JonesEric HarrisGeorge SodiniGizgizHannah BondHeath LedgerHunter S. ThompsonImma-The-DeerJake RobertsJames LeshkevichJarrad WillisJaylen FrybergJeff WeiseJenny GrantJiverly VoongJodie Gater and Stephanie GestierJoe StackJonathan Kendrick LewisJustin-anonKate SpadeKevin Neil WhitrickMarvin HeemeyerKimveer GillKlerckKurt CobainLeelah AlcornLil PeepLivecorpseMatthias SchoormannMario FerreyraMegan MeierMercedes HerreraMichael RyanMitchell HendersonMr. HandsMatti SaariJosh BallardNghtmrchld26Otoya YamaguchiPaula GoodspeedPekka-Eric AuvinenPhilip MarkoffPhoebe ConnopQuentin HubbardRachele RuddRehtaeh ParsonsRicardo LopezRichard JeniRobert HawkinsRobert SteinhäuserRobin WilliamsRudolph ZurickSadie DavilaSam LeesonSebastian BosseShane HalliganShaun DykesShawn WoolleyShayStephen KazmierczakStephen HuffSteve StephensStiletto oneTang YongmingTatiana the TigerThe An Heroes of BridgendTim KretschmerTiziana CantoneTony48219TooDamnFilthyTyler ClementiTyler DumstorfTyler PetersonVester Lee "Bryce Williams" Flanagan IIXallyfacex

Related Pages

90 Day JaneAn hero dayask.fmAutoerotic asphyxiationColumbineGolden iPodHeaven's GateHigh ScoreHow to become an heroMydeathspacePseudocideShotgun mouthwashSuicideThreatening suicideVirginia Tech massacreWaco

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