⚠️ Encyclopedia Dramatica is currently being restored by automated scripts ⚠️
There's been a lot of questions as to what's going on with the site and what comes next. So we have this (ordered) roadmap of what's being worked on and what's to come. This will be updated until the roadmap is complete as Æ has a lot of missing features and ideas that I'd like to fix in regards to its offerings before I implement big plans for the site's popularity and well-being in 2021.
Content restoration (Mostly done, few things missing that will be restored sporadically) Image restoration (Being run in background, nothing I can do cept wait)
Æ Imageboard (Currently being worked on)
Mediawiki upgrade and backend fixes
.onion domain for Tor-friendly editing and viewing
CSS overhaul (Fixing things like the videos on mobile, and overall a rehaul of the wiki's look to be more friendly to readers)
Paid bounty board for new articles (Won't be managed by me for legal reasons however I will ensure it runs smoothly)
Anonymous phone # service for those seeking ban evades from Twitter as well as a phone number not tied to their name (more details at launch)
Currently we are nearing our annual LLC renewal fee ($650) as well throwing the funds required for these other changes and aspects. If you would like to support Æ consider purchasing a copy of The Hustler's Bible or securing some Merch. Donating is also appreciated however I would rather give something back as per the two options above.
If you have any questions you can join our public Telegram chat to DM me privately or @ me in chat.
You can also email me via [email protected]
Merch notes: Thank you to all who have purchased merch. We will ship late January or mid February depending on our provider's speed.
Here's to setting the world on fire in 2021!
Malaysia Airlines Flight 370
You know what they say about journalism... If it bleeds, it leads... right? Unfortunately for distinguished press outlets worldwide, March of 2014 has turned out to be a pretty dry month in the annals of human affairs. In the absence of a lulzy school shooting or Tsarnaev copycat for like, another goddamned month, shit-eating hack journalists had to scrape by on what little they could salvage. Enter the sudden international panic and saturation coverage over the disappearance of Malaysia Airlines Flight 370, a fucking jumbo jet full of chinks, gooks, spics, and spooks. Most of them probably didn't even speak English—seems like no great loss, right?
As always, the evil liberal Jew media would have you believe otherwise. This is Cuban Missile Crisis, Iran Hostage-level shit going on right now.
The flight in a nutshell
City Wok Airlines went up into the sky, where it was promptly eaten by the sky, causing it to disappear from radar. The sky, not having an appetite for Chinese that particular day, spit (some sources say shit) the plane back out, sending it spiraling into the ocean.
Orientals who were lucky enough to have survived the tsunamis were now competing in the Asian Olympics for underwater airplane swimming. This would be the last time they ever competed, and the entire flight was posthumously awarded a gold medal in the sport for their brave efforts.
A search was conducted, where a large number of people applied arm floaties and took to giant rafts to search for bodies or burning plane parts, but nothing was ever found. After a few hours of fishing, they called it off and came to the conclusion that it had become the latest sunken treasure in Davey Jones' locker.
Plausible theories on what happened
- The leading theory among self-proclaimed experts is that one pilot was in an heroic mood and going for the MS Flight Simulator High Score but proved too pussy to pull off a 9/11 so he just kamikazeed 200+ passengers into the fucking ocean. To his credit, he may have earned second place: a noble effort.
- Can't rule out good old fashioned Jihad! Keep in mind - this is deep shitskin territory we're talking here.
- The USA did it.
- Catastrophic Mechanical Failure.
- Putin did it.
- The Aussies did it.
- Controlled-Flight-Into-Terrain (CFIT), unintentionally or otherwise.
- Ball Lightning.
- Aliens did it.
- Meteor Impact.
- Najib Razak did it.
- Tony Abbott did it.
- Kim Jong-un did it.
- The Twilight Zone.
- SpongeBob did it.
- The Jews did it. (Just like WTC)
- Bermuda Triangle.
- Rothschild did it.
- IN SOVIET RUSSIA, THEORIES PLAUSE YOU!
- HAARP weather and mind control efforts proved successful - as always.
- The pilots somehow discovered warp speed, or some kind of Stargate, and the plane's crew is currently being gangraped by aliens way past Andromeda right now.
- Iran did it.
- Obama did it - not as in, had covert agents plant undetectable C4 on luggage - no, our alleged "president" actually literally boarded the plane and hijacked it Rambo-style. He then diverted the plane into the sun and bailed out in the only parachute right before impact. For the lulz. Still second to Osama on the high score table, though.
- The Chinese did it.
- W did it.
- The American military seized the plane and has it held on some island.
- The plane really landed in China. All those concerned family and loved ones you see on television? They're paid Crisis Actor shills, and this is all a ruse to keep the press silent from the NWO False Flag Attacks in Crimea that will trigger WW3 and a Russian Invasion of the US. Quick, you know the drill! Grab SKS, Go Innawoods. Who Dares Wins. Buy our exclusive gold investor's kit today!
- CIA did it.
- A giant shark took it.
- YOU did it!
Malaysia Airlines Flight 370 is part of a series on
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