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A beautifully executed lynching by a member of the N.A.L.L.

How to Decorate your Nigger, also known as Lynching or The American National Pastime is a popular and harmless sport in United States in which several athletes play together with apes. There are many different rules of play, each differing by region. The general idea of lynching is for each player to find a nigger and give them several thought provoking challenges for them to overcome with their intellect. Depending on the outcome, each obstacle is worth a different number of points, with your points being totaled upon using your nigger to decorate local trees. If your voluntary partner fails to complete an obstacle before you can finish, you are disqualified. No harm done! You can always try again!

The true origins of this widely celebrated pastime lie in everyone hating niggers and wanting to make a game out of eradicating them. Even black people agree with the sport, otherwise they would never have agreed to participate. Lynching predates croquet, and has survived the generations for being famously lulzy in both nature and practice.

If you are interested in signing up for the N.A.L.L. (North American Lynching League) signups can be found here. Best of all, Canadians can come too!


There are many ways to go about lynching a nigger. If you are not a complete and utter faggot and read the top you would know that if your nigger dies before you hang him from a tree you phail.

Here are the steps fora a proper lynching:

  1. The first stage of a lynching is humiliation. It's common knowledge that niggers hate water and cannot swim, therefore a high-pressure hose is ideal for turning the street into a nigger slip 'n slide. Your goal during this stage should be ripped clothing, and possible bruising from flying into objects at high speeds.
  2. Next you want to limit movement. By this point the black person will understand that he is in danger and attempt to run. Therefore you must pwn his ligaments. Any sharp object will do, the goal is to make sure he does not get away.
  3. Finally you want to go omgwtfbbq on him. In this stage you have little to worry about in harming them, as niggers are born charred and therefore can't be burned. Once your nigger has become golden brown (o wait they were alredy) you are ready to move on.
  4. As you are undoubtedly a white catholic male, you have hung ornaments on a christmas tree before. Hang the product of your hard labor up for the whole town to see. You can judge how well you did based on the lulz of your friends and neighbors.

Happy Lynching!

Nigger Free Zone

If you are fortunate enough to live in a nigger free zone, substitutes can be made so you can enjoy lynching just like the real world. If you have any of the following household pests in your area lynching can also be performed.


See Also

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