⚠️ Encyclopedia Dramatica is currently being restored by automated scripts ⚠️
There's been a lot of questions as to what's going on with the site and what comes next. So we have this (ordered) roadmap of what's being worked on and what's to come. This will be updated until the roadmap is complete as Æ has a lot of missing features and ideas that I'd like to fix in regards to its offerings before I implement big plans for the site's popularity and well-being in 2021.
Content restoration (Mostly done, few things missing that will be restored sporadically) Image restoration (Being run in background, nothing I can do cept wait)
Æ Imageboard (Currently being worked on)
Mediawiki upgrade and backend fixes
.onion domain for Tor-friendly editing and viewing
CSS overhaul (Fixing things like the videos on mobile, and overall a rehaul of the wiki's look to be more friendly to readers)
Paid bounty board for new articles (Won't be managed by me for legal reasons however I will ensure it runs smoothly)
Anonymous phone # service for those seeking ban evades from Twitter as well as a phone number not tied to their name (more details at launch)
Currently we are nearing our annual LLC renewal fee ($650) as well throwing the funds required for these other changes and aspects. If you would like to support Æ consider purchasing a copy of The Hustler's Bible or securing some Merch. Donating is also appreciated however I would rather give something back as per the two options above.
If you have any questions you can join our public Telegram chat to DM me privately or @ me in chat.
You can also email me via [email protected]
Merch notes: Thank you to all who have purchased merch. We will ship late January or mid February depending on our provider's speed.
Here's to setting the world on fire in 2021!
Moby Dick has left the building
Karl Rove (also known as Moby Dick to the Democrats and My Brain to W) is the undisputed heavyweight champion of buying and rigging elections in the USA. If you asked random Americans the question, "Who was the 43rd president of the USA?", most would tell you that George W. Bush was. This is, in fact, pure bullshit. During W's presidency, Karl Rove and his Jew business criminal friends made all of the important decisions and proposals throughout Bush's two terms and used W as their good-old-stupid-Texan-boy frontman. The reason why George W. Bush was able to steal the elections in 2001 and 2004 was due to Rove and his corporate Jew friend's massive campaign funding and political influence. When examined carefully, Karl Rove has a striking resemblance to Emperor Palpatine, or, as pointed out by Stephen Colbert, a large ham.
Origins and Rise to Power
Along with other, now disgraced loyal Bushies such as Attorney-General Secret Squirrel, White House counsel Harriett Miers, and press secretary Scott McClellan, Rove was one of the infamous Texas Mafia, the driving force behind the makeover of George W. Bush from a drug-addled, drunken, draft-dodging Yale cheerleader who had totally failed trying to run a business in the private sector, into the Governor and Chief Executioner of Texas.
- Karl Rove, senior White House adviser (August 2007)
- Alberto Gonzales Attorney-General (August 2007)
- Dan Bartlett White House communications director (June 2007)
- Harriett Miers, White House counsel (January 2007)
- Mark McClellan Medicare administrator (September 2006)
- Scott McClellan (brother of Mark) press secretary (April 2006)
- Pat Wood Federal Energy Regulatory Commission chairman (April 2005)
- Rod Paige, Education Secretary (November 2004)
- Don Evans Commerce Secretary (November 2004)
Rove's Takeover of America
In the mid-1990s, Rove decided that he wanted to take control of the whole American government. Not being
particularly friendly, even in his human disguise as a balding white man, Rove used his
knowledge of the dark arts to create a puppet of low intelligence, which he disguised as
George W. Bush, Jr., and further rituals convinced Bush Sr. and the public that there had
always been a Bush Jr. From there, it was simply a matter of fixing the election, which was a piece of cake for Rove. Once in control, he began to implement policies both foreign and domestic according
to his whims, and for the profit of his Wall Street Jew friends. So far, ROve has led America into attacks on two foreign countries, causing eternal unrest in both of them, turning the locals into American flag-burning, suicidal
After the clusterfuck that was
W's Rove's eight-year rein in the USA, one would hope that Rove would be satisfied with 8 years of clusterfucking the whole government, the military, and the economy. Rove, being an evil Satanic Jew, was, of course, not remotely satisfied with only 8 years of it. He wanted another 8 years, and in 2012, chose another political sockpuppet, Mitt Romney, to try to win the election against the magic negro, so Rove could have another go at it and obtain more Jew Gold. Unfortunately for Rove, Romney lost the election, and now Rove has to be satisfied watching other business interests control the President, instead of himself. Until 2016, that is. Rest assured, Americans can expect to see Rove to be running another political sockpuppet in the 2016 election.
Defeating Karl Rove
Some argue that Karl Rove is untouchable since he does not officially hold a government position and claims that as an "immediate adviser to the president" can't be ordered to testify or appear before Senate Committees that want presidential dirty deeds investigated.
He constantly hides behind the shield of "executive privilege" which is the power claimed by the president and the executive branch to avoid such things as search warrants and subpoenas by the Senate or Congress. (Funny story: 'executive privilege' is not mentioned in the Constitution).
Nevertheless, Karl still had enough acumen left to know a sinking ship when he sees one and so in August 2007 he donned his rat fursuit and deserted the administration before it's totally sunk. In a statement prepared for the media he said:
President Bush responded with a speech of his own:
Apart from puppetry and ventriloquism, Karl Rove is an aficionado of the Rap 'sciences' and dabbles in freestyle rapping, breakdancing and cutting it up on the 1 & 2s whenever he is afforded the opportunity. When he gets the chance to "buss a rhyme" he assumes the identity of MC Rove (aka DJ Turd Blossom).
- Karl Rove learned his dirty tricks under the tutorship of Republican slash-and-burn master Donald Segretti.
- Karl Rove was awarded the Purple Heart for losing an arm fighting Charlie in Danang in the spring of '72
- Karl Rove's father had a pierced cock. 1 2
- Karl Rove has created ads against every Democractic candidate and cause under an umbrella corporation American Crossroads GPS.
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[Over To You]