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John Earnest

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John T. Earnest
File:John Earnest court pleads not guilty.jpg
Born Born June 8, 1999
Nationality Americunt
Highscore Lolno (204th notable loser)
Top 50? Killed 1, injured 3
Style FPS single player
An hero? No (V&)
Occupation School chess club president


Random loser who shot up the Chabad of Poway Synagogue in San Diego, California, on April 27, 2019, and livestreamed it (the dumb nigger set the stream private so nobody could watch it).

Normally, we'd put the subject's name in bold in the intro, but why bother, honestly? No one will ever remember this guy. The (((media))) sort of yawned and lost interest after day 1 when it turned out the shooter despised Trump, so there was no chance of spinning it into a Trump-bashing opportunity. Israel cashed in a bit by blaming Arabs (see below), but Jews gonna Jew. It barely even sparked any buzz on the old mass shooting meme.

Labelling Earnest a terrorist would be an insult to all those who've sacrificed their lives for the advancement of the art; this cocky 8chan twat couldn't even score past a 60-year-old pensioner minding her own business. He is further proof that Californians really shouldn't get involved in anything firearms-related.

The Impotence of Being Earnest

Earnest joined 8chan's /pol/ and immediately felt right at home. Through a combination of dedication and retardation, he went from being a sad lonely nerd to an angry and badly-informed basement-dweller in just under 18 months.

Inspired by the heroic deeds of Robert Bowers and Brenton Tarrant, Earnest sat himself down and wrote a terrible manifesto full of even worserer shitposting than Tarrant's. And we mean so bad, that you'd prefer Earnest shoot you rather than read it to you. Since Earnest was just an edgy teen with delusions about being the vanguard of a new race war, he decided to pad his manifesto with ludicrously self-aggrandizing statements. The cringiest of these was about how he hoped to be released from prison when ZOG was overthrown, and would then lead fresh sorties against the Enemies of the White Race.

He tried setting fire to a mosque, but hadn't realized that sandniggers sleep inside the goddamned things. So the Muzzies woke up, put the fire out while yawning, and went back to sleep. He boasted in his manifesto about getting away with it, but the sad truth is the Islams probably thought it was some homeless bum's campfire and never realized they'd been attacked at all. This brings us to the Day Of Action itself.

Earnest got tooled up, drove to a local synagogue (which he believed to be ZOG's local branch), and walked in with adrenaline surging through his thin teenage veins like spinach through Popeye. This probably explains why he then sprayed-and-prayed like a hyperactive toddler's first time with bubble-mix, and caused about as much damage. He blew the fingers off a rabbi's hand and took out one (1) whole Jewess. At that point, his rifle jammed and the synagogue's hired muscle finally noticed him and shouted at him loudly, causing Earnest to shit himself and run away.

Apparently, after fleeing the scene, Earnest actually called the cops on himself and was apprehended after surrendering without a struggle. Even Couch Cuck had more fucking dignity than this.

FINAL TALLY: 1.015 deaths (subject to downward revision if the Rabbi's fingers get stitched back on). He didn't even shoot himself out of shame and self-loathing. If this is the alt-right's idea of gaining popularity, then they should find a better PR guy.

Advance publicity

John Earnest - Original Thread Screenshot 13192921.jpg


Internet Reaction

File:John Earnest.png
Oy vey! 1 year on /pol/ and he shoah a synagogue with bullets!

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Barely any. No one was impressed. On 8chan, an FBI agent feebly tried to blame the whole thing on Putin, but couldn't drum up much interest. Earnest does however manage to claw back one six-millionth of a point for cred, because he made PewDiePie feel so butthurt about the "Subscribe" meme, that the Pied Piper of Sweden made a sadface video about disowning the whole thing (because that tactic worked so incredibly well when Matt Furie killed off Pepe.)

Nevar forget


File:John earnest - pro-israel twitter propaganda - donald trump.png
2: Trump follows Israeli PM's lead
(doesn't contradict Israeli narrative)


File:John earnest - pro-israel twitter propaganda - donald trump (2).png
4: Hawkish US foreign policy think-tank executive decides to blame Ilhan Omar for some reason




Moral of the story: "Never let a good crisis go to waste!"

Gallery of epic failure

John_earnest_synagogue_shooter_chopin_fantasie_piano.mp4

His musical talent far exceeds his knack for mass shootings. Chopin is rolling in his grave.

Class Loadout

Class Setup
Item Accessories/Bonus
GTA4IconsM4Rifle.png
  • Perk 1: Stopping Power
ESM Stopping Power.png
  • The power to stop only 1 opponent.
  • Perk 2: Overkill
50px
  • It's over after 1 kill.
  • Perk 3: Extreme Conditioning
50px


Score

Graded Score
Kill count: 1/20 ''(3 injured) - Even unarmed kikes were a challenge for this fag
Accuracy: 0/20 ''Hit or Miss, I guess you never miss, huh?
Style: 0/20 'BAWWWW manifesto, typical 4cuck's /pol/ user'
Butthurt: 1/20 'The usual "false flag" bawwing in 4chan, caused lulz for jews'
Bonus: 10/20 'Autist with rage'
Total Score: 12/100 ((F))
DID WORSE THAN SOFA CUCK!!!!
See full ranking


Wanted Level:
___________________

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___________________

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Mall Cop


External Links

File:File:JewDiePie.png
PewDiePie is ZOG confirm?

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John Earnest
is part of a series on
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Habitats [-+]
Traditions [-+]
H8s [-+]


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[Game Over][Insert Coin]
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Ranked Mode (Single Player)

Adam LanzaAnders Behring BreivikAndrew KehoeAriana Grande MassacreBaruch GoldsteinBrenton TarrantCampo Elías DelgadoCharles Whitman's TumorCho Seung-HuiDevin Patrick KelleyFort HoodJack Gilbert GrahamJames HubertyJeffrey DahmerLuby's massacreMartin BryantMutsuo ToiNice Truck Attack 2016Omar MateenPatrick CrusiusReina Nightclub MassacreSagamihara StabbingsShinji AobaStephen PaddockTed BundyVladislav RoslyakovWoo Bum-kon

Casual Mode (Single Player)

Aaron AlexisAlexandre BissonnetteAli David SonbolyAnton Lundin PetterssonAurora Theatre ShootingBreda Highschool MassacreBreitscheidplatzBruce Jeffrey PardoCapital Gazette ShootingCharles BishopChris Harper-MercerConnor BettsDallas Sniper AttacksDavid KatzDavid Malcolm GrayDavid LongDeath to Traitors, Freedom for BritainDerrick BirdDeWayne CraddockDimitrios PagourtzisDmitry VinogradovDylann Storm RoofElliot RodgerÉric BorelGabe ParkerGeorge SodiniGian Luigi FerriJames Alex FieldsJared Lee LoughnerJason DaltonJason RodriguezJaylen FrybergJeff WeiseJesse OsborneJiverly VoongJoe StackJohn Russel HouserJosef FritzlKhalid MasoodKimveer GillKip KinkelLam Kor WanMamoru TakumaMarc LepineMark BartonMark EssexMatthew de GroodMichael CarnealMichael Kenneth McLendonMichael RyanMikese MorseMr. SaariNghtmrchld26Nikolas CruzPekka-Eric AuvinenPennsylvania School StabbingRamadan Van ManRandy StairRobert BalesRobert BowersRobert HawkinsRobert SteinhäuserSantino William LeganSayfullo SaipovSaint Petersburg Metro bombingThe Twinkie ManThomas Watt HamiltonTim KretschmerTJ LaneTrystan Andrew TerrellUnabomberWade Michael PageZhao ZeweiZug Massacre

Co-Operative Mode

1-14 Jakarta AttacksBoston Marathon BombingCharlie HebdoColumbineHiroshima and NagasakiJews did WTCPearl HarborSan Bernardino shootingSandniggers in ParisSri Lanka Easter BombingsTimothy McVeigh

Sid Meier's Civilization

Adolf HitlerAugusto PinochetCharles MansonHeaven's GateHolocaustJonestownJoseph StalinKim Il-sungMao ZedongOsama bin LadenPol PotSaddam HusseinWacoWorld War II

Banned From Scoring

Asa CoonBilly MitchellBrian Isaack ClydeJohn EarnestLogan ClarkNasim AghdamSam HydeSol PaisTodd RogersWilliam Atchison