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Here's to setting the world on fire in 2021!
If you can define deviantART with a few words, those words would be weeaboo heaven, talentless hangout and the breeding ground for pricks. I-heart-hikaru is a settling example for a talentless wapanese prick.
Kimberly Schaefer, Honoto Kocubunji (in the fantastic moonland that she will never touch) and just plain Hikaru, is a talentless weeaboo and deviantART diva who does not play by the rules. Hikaru has entered the DA hall of fame by being a lovely role model for tartlets by being homophobic, hypocritical and acting like a gigantic raging asshole to other users and even to her own e-friends. Don’t tell her that she’s a hypocrite, though – her delicate sensibilities cannot handle such complex facts., also known as Celestial-Heaven, Dejavu-E,
Not only that, Hikaru can’t even remember comments she has posted merely hours ago, even when they are clearly visible on the webbernets. Indeed, Hikaru, like many other users, is a pure waste of DA’s bandwidth by constantly uploading sloppy artwork, whiny text walls and her overall bitchings.
Who is she?
Hikaru has bathed in the magical iridescence of the oh-so-mystical faggot tree and as a result she lives, breathes and eats anime. Yes, it is not a big surprise that a tartlet with their own ED page would be a wapanese faggot who wastes time drawing shitty anime fanart. Like every weeaboo, Hikaru chooses to imitate anime artists, and even uses copic markers, markers used by famous manga artists. Surely this girl will go to Japan one day and be a famous Japanese artist under the alias Honoto Kocubunji; like we haven't heard that story before.
To further prove her undying sexual attraction towards that which is Japanese, she even has a MySpace called the . However, when you look at her face, the last thing that comes to mind is “Japanese girl”, while the first impression would be “trying too hard”. Seriously, look at her and tell us that she doesn’t resemble an ugly doll that has been sitting on a shelf for so long waiting for a blind girl to buy her. Even worse, some people have claimed that Hikaru has actually attempted to cosplay Para-Para. Of course, one should be thankful that no photo exists of it.
Above all, Hikaru seems to have anger problems, even going to a therapist about it. This explains her endless rantings and outbursts, yet sadly, is abused as an excuse for every mistake she has committed. The following are the victims of her fist of rage:
Hikaru and art
Surprise surprise - Hikaru is a tracer. Oh the joy; a tartlet with their own ED article who happens to be a tracer. And what else could perfect this tracing scandal off without a nice serving of denial? That denial would be that she merely references which is completely okay!
Now she's complaining and bitching about "art theft", what she's done apparently is invisible to her. Examples are listed in this section, by the way. Look at all the art thieving the bitch has done collection of drawings that are completely original.
You think what she's whining about in this journal entry is considered a lesson to her about what she's done; but no, she looks to it as something against her completely and doesn't see any point behind it. She pouts, cries, and complains about people taking 'her' work but she has never seen herself as such a low life existence like she is and will continue to remain. The only thing she's doing is becoming worse. She's acting as if she was on a stage telling people she's the delicate princess that needs saving from herself for all that she's done. Being the crowd is awed by her blank words of confusion and pity for her, they comfort her in words knowing that they have no meaning of existence along with her.
What's amazing is she doesn't even have enough sense to tell everyone or admit to everything she's done. She's too scared of herself to do so. She's afraid everyone that kisses her ass (that she once stated she wouldn't let it happen and she's done with devianTARD after complaining, again, about the admins, the people, and everything on devianTARD she walked into) will leave her into the life she once had and she cannot simply take that step because she wants to remain popular with a fake life and reasoning seeing that's nothing but what herself lives off of.
Response to critique
To every tartlet, giving critique is considered to be the taboo. After all, everyone’s art is fucking perfect and no further question shall be asked! Not only that, if you point at the mistakes then you are an evil person who knows nothing about art or style. That is a perfect example of Hikaru’s wise words. Indeed, any form of constructive criticism, no matter how polite or civilized it is, is considered to be words of pure ignorance. To prove her butthurt over critique, she even set her deviations to discourage critique.
—It's realism to her, and that's what counts.
For example, every single fucking thing in her gallery is purely anime. Now, the typical anime style is not very realistic. Big eyes and anatomy that does not meet proper proportion is not realistic, so why label it as realism or even semi-realism? In this case, if it’s realism to Hikaru then it is realism. Period. If you do question why it is categorised under realism or state that it’s “more like x rather than realism”, then Hikaru will lay it down and set the fact that it is purely realism. Anybody who disagrees is an idiot in her eyes, merely because their opinion does not mirror hers.
But go ahead. Critique her. And see where it will go.
As mentioned before, Hikaru has certain anger problems. So whom does she rage at? The answer is simple: homosexuals. Hikaru has gloriously boasted her hatred of yaoi, gay anime art that pretty much every weeaboo drools over. Needless to say, fantards raged over the stamp accusing Hikaru of being an intolerant and close-minded homophobe. As the comments piled up in her message box, her anger built up simultaneously and soon enough, she made a journal as response to all the h8erz.
—Totally not homophobic.
Of course making this journal is about as smart as waving a red cape in front of an angry bull in a Looney Toons cartoon. Basically, this journal contains sentences that contradict others. No fucking shit. The journal was originally going to be centered on her dislike towards yaoi only and not homosexuals in general. However, she then states that she does not approve of the lifestyle of homosexuals. Clearly not homophobic, right? It was only until mangapunksai, a senior user and former moderator noticed Hikaru’s plague on the today page and decided to share her own opinion on this matter. In Hikaru’s eyes, mangapunksai was acting like a complete bully because she showered her with logic. Of course, after Hikaru was defeated in her pathetic debate, she deleted the journal and pretended that it never existed.
What makes this utterly hilarious is that she completely moved on from how yaoi is something that she doesn’t care much for to how she doesn’t approve the “lifestyle” of LGBT people yet befriends some despite her fear of them.
But let’s take certain things into consideration:
- You are dumb because you think she is homophobic.
- What she says is right. No questions asked.
- Hikaru hates yaoi and yuri because it's unnatural.
- However, she reads CLAMP mangas. CLAMP is known for being the gayest circle of artists and for including sexually ambiguous characters within their series.
- Hikaru is literally afraid of gay people, but befriends them.
- No scratch that; she actually hates gays.
- Sexuality = Lifestyle
- All gays share the same lifestyle, which means that all straight people live the same way as well.
Since Hikaru sees herself as a deviantDIVA, she decided to follow the steps of Lolly after the banning of Shadowgamers. That’s right; she decided to break as many rules as she possibly can. But that’s not all, folks! If she’s tired, then she can just use her mindless puppet of a brother to do it for her!
Although spamming and flaming other deviants was officially listed as one of the things that are not against the official terms of service after the Great DA Troll of 2007, extreme cases can get deviants banned. That is if you aren’t – oh say… POPULAR! A perfect example of her god-given right to spam and flame is after a totally heterophobic user, itainohime, made a totally non-joke stamp that opposes heterosexual pairings. This very stamp used a background that was the same as Hikaru’s anti yaoi stamp. It is not within Hikaru’s ways to be a reasonable woman.
The inevitable happened and Hikaru spammed constantly calling itainohime an idiot for not sharing her views. Oh what a crime! It was until Hikaru took the internet so seriously that she called out her non-sockpuppet brother to defend heterosexuality for the greater good! However, in Hikaru’s fucked up mind, giving death threats is the equivalent of being defensive. Her “brother” was banned afterward, but Hikaru wasn’t. Isn’t deviantART just wonderful?
Yes, because Hikaru is popular, therefore she is talented and is completely impervious to the banhammer, despite ban evading. That’s not her only sin against the ToS, there’s more… For example, her journal stating her dislike to homophobia is seen as hate speech judging by deviantART’s ToS, yet – surprise, surprise – she wasn’t banned. Next, she also has a tendency to be a faves whore. That’s right more faves satisfies her e-clit. Because faves equal popularity, Hikaru has boosted her USI by creating multiple self-made fanclubs to add her own artwork to their favorite’s collection. Again, this is against the Terms of Service, yet she was still left untouched.
Her dead friend
—Journal Entry: Wed Aug 6, 2008, 12:40 PM
The story starts with Hikaru and her band of weeaboo retards, the only people whom she could possibly befriend, returned from MetroCon. Her friend, Ben, died because he was a reckless asshole and probably fell asleep at the wheel. But it wasn’t only some shitty anime convention; they also got drunk at a rave party. Hikaru did not expect them to leave drunk even after going to a rave party; how stupid can this girl possibly be?
After her friend died, Hikaru went all emo (unconfirmed if she actually cut herself during so) and she needed a good shoulder to cry on. That shoulder was, of course, deviantART. She would make journal after journal concerning her hard and painful adventure of living everyday without her friend. Yes, everyone, Hikaru is sad! We need to be there for her and make her feel better! But wait… who died…? Oh well, who cares? IT’S HIKARU WHO’S SAD SHE NEEDS US!!!1 Indeed, she would make every single spot on her profile page dedicated to her “space cowboy” only to be set up as a signal that she is the one who needs help. Her avatar, signature and even her own ID is dedicated to her engaging in questionable activities with her dead friend.
Unfortunately for Hikaru, people grow tired after two months of moaning and whining. Why is it that she states that she is so sad that she claims that she could not possible live another day with such sadness, yet is not sad enough to find deviantART pointless and check her messages everyday?
Republican Senator Secretly Gay, Film at 11
Hikaru isn't a crook, but she may be a hypocrite. After centuries of oppression against the gay people, Hikaru announced to the world that henceforth she would choose tacos over hot dogs. She dumped her 32-year-old boyfriend, cut her hair into a magnificent dyke spike and started dating a mysterious lesbo chink from a far away land named
Cynthia S-chan. Like all good things though, this came to an end. And then to a start again. Incidentally during this whole series of breakups and makeups Hikaru lived in Florida and Cynthia S-chan lived in Phoenix, Arizona. She's also reversed her stance on liberals. But not nigs.
- Notes - A must read!
- Constructive Criticism - A big no-no for her.
- Lolly - Also tried to break as many rules as possible.
- Back in time! - Go way back and see her true form!
- Guess who came back to dA for some lulz? Dead.
- for herself... Yeah... Now used as a club...
- - Her [EX]main account. REOPENED as of February 2010. (Possible troll?) Definite Troll
- The new Celestial-Heaven? Troll and see. Dead account is dead. Weird?
- Her official MB account!
- Her Facebook
- Her Halloween costume
I-heart-hikaru is part of a series on
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