⚠️ Encyclopedia Dramatica is currently being restored by automated scripts ⚠️

There's been a lot of questions as to what's going on with the site and what comes next. So we have this (ordered) roadmap of what's being worked on and what's to come. This will be updated until the roadmap is complete as Æ has a lot of missing features and ideas that I'd like to fix in regards to its offerings before I implement big plans for the site's popularity and well-being in 2021.

Æ Roadmap

  • Content restoration (Mostly done, few things missing that will be restored sporadically)
  • Image restoration (Being run in background, nothing I can do cept wait)
  • Æ Imageboard (Currently being worked on)
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  • .onion domain for Tor-friendly editing and viewing
  • CSS overhaul (Fixing things like the videos on mobile, and overall a rehaul of the wiki's look to be more friendly to readers)
  • Paid bounty board for new articles (Won't be managed by me for legal reasons however I will ensure it runs smoothly)
  • Anonymous phone # service for those seeking ban evades from Twitter as well as a phone number not tied to their name (more details at launch)

  • Currently we are nearing our annual LLC renewal fee ($650) as well throwing the funds required for these other changes and aspects. If you would like to support Æ consider purchasing a copy of The Hustler's Bible or securing some Merch. Donating is also appreciated however I would rather give something back as per the two options above.

    If you have any questions you can join our public Telegram chat to DM me privately or @ me in chat.

    You can also email me via [email protected]

    Merch notes: Thank you to all who have purchased merch. We will ship late January or mid February depending on our provider's speed.

    Here's to setting the world on fire in 2021! - aediot



    Flower

    From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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    Flower

    Flower the Meerkat is the star of - well, actually, was the star of - a show called Meerkat Manor, a very educational show with at least 100 fans.

    Last Thursday, bricks were shat and Flower died after getting owned on the face by a cobra with AIDS. Fans of the show became butthurt over this, and YouTube exploded with over 9,000 videos tributes of her. Even more lol-inducing, lolcow conspiracy theorists claim that the camera crew filming the show had actually been at the place when Flower got bitten and watched as she died. Flower's death has had a pretty dramatic impact on the gang. Rocket Dog has taken her place as the new leader of the Whiskers. Meanwhile, Flower's mate, "Zaphod" grieved for about 5 minutes before ditching the gang in search of some hot meerkat action. Nice.

    They also claim that they ensured Flower's death for some bullshit about advancing the drama in the show and other things no one cares about. In reality, the show is filmed by placing special recording cameras in the desert and the camera crew only comes around to pick up the film. A more likely idea is that by the time the Flower shitstorm happened, that meerkat was already fucking dead. Of course, the fans failed to realize this and continued on with their videos anyway.

    Steps to troll the fans

    File:Butthurt meerfag.PNG
    Trolling meerkat fans is a piece of cake. They're among the most butthurt in the furry community
    1. Remind the fans that Flower is "just a rat".
    2. Tell them to get lives.
    3. Lol at the fact that she got OWNED by that cobra.
    4. Tell them that no one gives a shit.
    5. ?????
    6. PROFIT!

    Lulz-Worthy Quotes

    Pulled from the comments of many JewTube videos, this is some lulz-worthy shit. Seriously, do make sure you're alone, or else people will look at you funny if you laugh out loud and think you're gay.


       
     
    if hannibal dies im ganna through a party and invite all my friends
     

     
     

    —YouTube User


       
     
    YOU GUYZ! This show... I will never watch it again! It makes me cry!!!! I can`t belive Flower got killded by A EVIL SNAKE FROM HELL! R.I.P. flower and her family
     

     
     

    An Hero in training.


       
     
    What The FUCK FLOWER DIED AND NOBODY TOLD ME!!!!!!
     

     
     

    —Luser

    And of course, Atimon gave us moar to LOL at, but you couldn't expect any different:


       
     
    I finally got a response from the German Animal Planet Team after waiting for a reply for about a month. They've talked to the production team as well. Flower's dead. I hope you bastards enjoyed pointing the camera at Flower while she was dying! F*** you!
     

     
     

    Atimon, in the midst of living vicariously through a similar TV show.

    Not quite a LiveJournal tribute, but....

    Link to the official obituary--the following version has been slightly edited for maximum lulz.: Flower, star of Animal Planet's popular series, Meerkat Manor, is survived by loving mate Zaphod and many children including Mozart, Mitch, Buster, Suggs and Izzy. Flower leaves behind a devastated meerkat mob now without its fearless leader. From humble beginnings, she created one of the largest, most close-knit families on the Manor. Affectionately referred to as the "Kalahari Desert Rose" by those who knew her best, she was a formidable leader and a noble mother.

    Now this is a story all about how my
    Life got flipped turned upside down
    And I'd like to take a minute just sit right there
    I'll tell you how I become the Queen of a clan called Whiskers
    In west Kalahari born and raised
    On the sand dunes is where I spent most of my days
    Chillin' out, maxin', relaxin', all cool
    And all eatin' some scorpions outside of the school
    When a couple of guys they were up to no good
    Started makin' trouble in my neighborhood
    I got in one little fight and the fans got scared
    And said, "You're gonna be the start of the clan called Whiskers."
    I whistled for a cab and when it came near
    The license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror
    If anything I could say that this cab was rare
    But I thought, "Nah, forget it. Yo home to Whiskers!"
    I pulled up to the burrow 'bout 7 or 8
    And I yelled to the cabby yo holmes smell ya later
    Looked at my kingdom I was finally there
    To sit on my throne as the prince of Whiskers.

    Gallery

    See Also

    Links

    Portal icon television.gif

    Flower is part of a series on

    Media

    Visit the Media Portal for complete coverage.

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    Flower is part of a series on

    Furfaggotry

    Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage.