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|Who yah gonna call??|
Fembusters (also known as Ghostbusters (2016) , Cisbusters, and Ghostbusters: Answer The Call) - original title: flapjack, is a sequel to White Chicks and Bridesmaids directed by Paul Feig✡, disguised as a reboot of the 1984 classic, Ghostbusters, only with a shittier plot, unlikable characters, laughable CGI and 400% more FEMINISM!!!. Where the original Ghostbusters was somewhat tongue in cheek, and had subtle references to other horror films, the dyke version is now going into Disaster Movie territory by ripping off complete scenes, without even adding anything. It is funny because you have seen it before. Memes. Now if you think all this is a stupid idea, well FUCK YOU: you're actually sexist, a misogynist, and you hate all women. Report yourself to the nearest feminist so she can enjoy your delicious male tears.
- 1 How we got here
- 2 Big franchise hustlaz
- 3 Release
- 4 So you've finally accepted that you're a sexist, misogynistic shitbag pissbaby dudebro man-child
- 5 Plot
- 6 Misc junk
- 7 See also
- 8 External Links
How we got here
For years after the release of Ghostbusters 2, the original Ghostbusters cast and crew were kicking around the idea of doing a third Ghostbusters film. It was stalled for years because of shitty writing, as well as Bill Murray raking in mad amounts of hipster money by working on Wes Anderson movies, and thus he didn't want to mess that shit up. Eventually, efforts to make Ghostbusters 3 finally reached a point where there was a script that everyone enjoyed, and things were ready to move forward. However, studio heads freaked out when Harold Ramis✡' movie Year One turned out to be a bomb and thus didn't trust him to work on the sequel. Then Harold Ramis had to die, and that was basically the end of that.
Before Ramis died, however, the original Ghostbusters cast did get to work on a new Ghostbusters video game, which was actually pretty good. Fans thus treated it as Ghostbusters 3, meaning Sony Pictures (current owners of the Ghostbusters franchise) felt like they washed their hands in trying to make fans happy, and they therefore felt free to do whatever the fuck they wanted to with the next film.
Here's James Rolfe explaining the whole Ghostbusters 3 deal in more detail:
Sony Pictures has never been interested in making a GOOD movie, just a movie that makes lots of money. Apparently someone within Sony Pictures thinks that "good movie" and "money making movie" are mutually exclusive. Worse: now while any idiot knows that nostalgia sells big time, Sony Pictures thought that all they had to do to get some of that sweet nostalgia money was take someone who made a movie that made a ton of cash, insert some 80's nostalgia into the film, and it should TOTALLY make billions of dollars. RADICAL! And that's exactly what happened with this Ghostbusters film.
In 2011, Paul Feig made a movie called Bridesmaids, starring Kristen Wiig and Melissa McCarthy, which apparently did fairly well in the box office. Since Bridesmaids also involved ghosts, demons, and the supernatural, AND it had a very strong 1980's retro theme to it, Paul Feig was clearly a perfect fit to write and direct the new Ghostbusters. Upon getting the job, Paul Feig used his high quality writing abilities to take the original 1984 Ghostbusters script, erase "written by Dan Aykroyd and Harold Ramis", and write in "written by Paul Feig". Oh, and he also took the main characters and replaced them with female versions of them. Take a look for yourself:
But hey, don't dare bring this up to Paul Feig himself, or he'll get angry on Twitter.
Once news got out about this, everyone started to complain about how having four female Ghostbusters ruins their childhood or whatever. But c'mon people, it's the current year! Hating on a movie just because it has women in it is SOOO Two-thousand-and-LATE! In fact, this is what you get for being so attached to a franchise who's entire objective is to bleed money from you.
In any case, the movie can't be as bad as you're making it sound. You're just over-reacting. It's STILL the Ghostbusters! And men or women, busting ghosts is ageless. Right?
"[The Hate is] the greatest thing that ever happened"
Meanwhile, chairman of Sony Pictures Entertainment, Tom Rothman, made it clear that he was intentionally fanning the flames by saying that all the controversy surrounding the film was the best thing to ever happen to the film.
—Tom Rothman, chairman of Sony Pictures Entertainment, trying to pretend that the negative backlash against Fembusters was somehow a good thing
OK, so, for the record:
- Sony Pictures Entertainment knew Fembusters was clearly shit from the get-go and won't do well on its own
- A false narrative was then hatched to troll people into talking about it
- To continue to get people to talk about it, Sony Pictures jerks the leash they have on the Ghostbusters cast and crew (and copyright holders) to make them taunt people into further rage
- Shame people into watching it by calling them 45-year old men who still live in their parent's basement (prove them wrong by supporting Feminism and buying a ticket!)
Too bad we live in a reality where negative reaction to a media event is a BAD thing, but I guess this just shows how much these guys are experts on spinning shit to their apparent advantage. It doesn't always work all the time: when the article writer asked Tom about how much he thinks the movie would need to make in the box office in order for it to be considered a "hit", Tom said:
—Tom Rothman, chairman of Sony Pictures Entertainment, totally revealing that he knows Fembusters is going to tank after the first week
The problem with all this is that this is the same Tom Rothman who, among all the other shitty executive decisions he's made, totally passed on Deadpool when he worked at Fox. The same Deadpool that made like $200 million at the box office. Tom thinks that for all the sexists they'll lose, they'll gain twice as many people who'll watch Fembusters as a political act... like, a stand against the patriarchy who'll otherwise keep female characters and actors down. However, Tom is underestimating how many people will actually watch it as a political statement: SJWs are the WORST people to pander to to try to get them to buy something, because SJWs have no concept of "speaking with their wallet". That is to say, they will NEVER reward anyone who does what they want them to with actual money, for they feel that a good deed is its own reward... Hollywood and Marvel Comics and everyone else is SUPPOSED to be politically correct and fighting for social justice, so there is no reason to reward them for doing what they're SUPPOSED to be doing in the first place. And thus, Tom shat on the people who WOULD pay to go see it over those who never will.
Oh, sure, it'll make SOME money, but not enough to justify all the shittalking Sony has done over the past year. Don't say we didn't warn you.
Fembusters insider tries to free himself from The Narrative
On the other hand, the original director of the original Ghostbusters (and current producer of Fembusters), Ivan Reitman, said that maybe, just maybe, the backlash against the reboot has nothing to do with sexism, but because of all of the passionate fans of the original.
—Ivan Reitman, director of Ghostbuters and producer of Fembusters, speaking the truth
Furthermore, Ivan actually disliked the first trailer (who didn't?), which alone might be a major crack showing in the veneer... if he wasn't forced to adhere to The Narrative somehow...
—Ivan Reitman, producer of Fembusters, SAYING what Sony wants to hear, but secretly doing the equivalent of blinking in Morse Code "T-O-R-T-U-R-E"
If the movie wasn't a gigantic shit-fest, full of racist stereotypes and shitty cliches, what is it really? Besides, there are plenty of trailers which did a good job of "representing what the movie ACTUALLY is" about... like, I dunno, the original Star Wars? You can't tell me there wasn't a single person in 1977 who saw the trailer and felt that like the movie DIDN'T deliver on the promises that the trailer represented. Or the trailer for Alien? Jurassic Park? Shit, everyone who saw the trailer for Fantastic Four (2015) knew it was going to be shit... and guess what, it WAS. But hey, we get it Ivan. You want to talk shit about the movie, but are contractually obligated not to.
In any case, you would think that maybe since Ivan one of the members involved in Fembusters, Fembusters fans might listen to him anyways. Because, CLEARLY he still supports Fembusters (I mean, he SAID he does!), so he's on THEIR side, right?
In fact, so many different articles are trying to spin what he said into something totally different, or otherwise try to still cram that "it's REALLY about sexism!" bullshit down our throats. Here's my favorite one, from Will Lerner of Yahoo! Movies:
—Will Lerner of Yahoo! Movies, who clearly did not read ANY of the comments in ANY Fembusters-related video, and therefore missed the parts where people say basically the opposite in DROVES.
As a side note, once again you have another white dude trying to stick up for womankind by pushing The Narrative. These guys are so much easier to spot now, huh?
Big franchise hustlaz
Fembusters is nothing more than a shitty nostalgia cashgrab. Like, to UNNECESSARY levels. But as Paul Feig tries to spin in this article :
—Paul Feig, trying to justify two wrongs making a right.
The problem with his rationale is... there's a very obvious difference between "making money on a piece of art" and "making art for the money". Does Paul Feig believe that, just because Bill Watterson made a living off Calvin & Hobbes, that Calvin & Hobbes was a "cash grab"? Hell no; the difference between Feig and Watterson is that Watterson didn't accept putting Calvin's face on a slew of merchandise, no matter how much Watterson could make from the deal. See, trying to make a living off your art is not why everyone is calling Fembusters a "cash grab". Rather, it's making something that NO ONE FUCKING WANTED in the first place, all while thinking that they WILL want it JUST because it has things the producers THINK would appeal to them (like nostalgia)... and THEN shitting on them when they say they STILL don't want it (by calling them assholes or 45-year old manchilds who still live with their mother's basement, etc). THAT is a "cash grab".
But anyways, Sony spent all that money making a movie no one wanted, so they gotta make that money back somehow. Here's some of those ways.
Gotta make that money man
At the aforementioned fan event, Sony Pictures announced that they were creating a new company, "Ghost Corps" , which will be tasked with the responsibility for expanding and extending the life of the Ghostbusters franchise. Because it's bad enough that Sony is doing this unnecessary nostalgia cash-grab, they won't be satisfied until the Ghostbusters franchise has been squeezed dry of any value and potential until it's a mere husk of its former self. We can only imagine what bullshit they'll produce, let alone if they'll try to use Ghost Corps to salvage whatever they can out of the final Fembusters movie.
However, seeing as the trajectory of Fembusters is going straight into the trashcan, we might actually be spared the torture of Ghost Corp and Sony Pictures destroying this once viable franchise. We can only hope, and pray.
So some rapper named Nas is planning on releasing a Ghostbusters-inspired fashion line . Because when I think of Ghostbusters,
Ghostbusters LEGO toys
Actually, this is perhaps the only iteration of Fembusters that might actually be worthwhile, as these Fembusters LEGO sets do a pretty good job of completely detaching the characters in the movie from the shitty elements of the movie itself. It's not hard to feel like the LEGO version of the main characters were actually newly created characters FOR these LEGO sets themselves, completely unburdened by someone else's shitty imagination (and Sony's executive meddling). And that's because of the very nature of LEGO toys themselves: it's all about being given a blank slate and the freedom to invent new stories with what you've created, with the end result being limited only by your own imagination.
In other words, some 6 year old girl playing with these LEGO toys will probably come up with a far better (and considerably more unique) Fembusters movie than Paul Feig and company getting paid millions of dollars to simply rip off the original Ghostbusters movie.
Not content enough to drive the Ghostbusters franchise into the ground with a shitty movie, the powers that be also created a shitty Ghostbusters video game.
But hey, if the idea of being a Ghostbuster in the game isn't enough to get you to buy it... preordering a copy of it will net you a free!!... when it's released in digital formats 6 months later, that is.
Remember Ghostbusters: Sanctum of Slime ? The game is just like that, except worse. Because now it features Torchlight graphics. But whereas Torchlight could run on a toaster, this disaster only manages 30 fps (barely) on Xbox One and the PS4, where you on PC need a fucking GTX660 to run this game.
Watch out Crysis, there's a new sheriff in town
Okay, so it looks bad and it runs bad. But is it bad? Yes. Even Kotaku who has praised Fembusters hated this crap.
—http://archive.is/6bEKS, Polygon's Justin McElroy
And to boot, nobody is playing this coop game. The following screenshot was taking on the:
OST featuring Fall Out Boy and Missy Elliot
Somehow managing to outdo themselves in making this stinky turd even worse, they actually decided to let the Hoobastank cover. The first song from the soundtrack was released and despite featuring a woman (Elle King), has not been downvoted, mostly because it is okay. Unlike the movie.
Two worthless acts coming together. One being the Nickelback of music acts, the other not having released an album in 15 years
—http://archive.is/P2lvc#selection-1375.134-1375.290, Even Jezebel hates it.
NBA Finals Commercials
Sony Pictures started to get the idea that Fembusters isn't doing too well, especially with potential male audiences. So Sony Pictures decided to kick off a short series of Ghostbusters-themed commercials starring call them 45 year old manchildren??and , which during the , in order to in the movie from male fans. But wait, I thought all it took to get male fans interested in the film was to
What's funny is that these videos are being downvoted just the same---the Behind the Scenes video with Kobe Bryant has 322 Upvotes versus 483 Downvotes (a 60% downvote rating, compare with the first trailer's 77% downvote rating). B-But... all these news articles keep telling us that men hate the movie because it stars women, and yet how could a video with a male Ghostbuster get downvotes just the same? It's almost as if the media is LYING to its readers to push some sort of agenda!
Ghostbusters Action Figures
Twitter Hashtag Logo
In the lead up to the movie, Twitter decided to give the Ghostbusters hashtag a bit of extra flair by tacking on the Ghostbusters symbol next to it.
Y'know, because GRRRLPOWER. No, seriously, it's like, the powers that be feel that they need to really drive home the point that THIS IS HISTORY IN THE MAKING by doing this special thing that very few other hashtags in the history of Twitter have been afforded, because this is the PERFECT way to combat all the haters. YEAH GIRLPOWER
Fembusters was released on July 15, 2016 in the US (the only region that matters). After months of speculation, people finally got to see how shitty it actually was. And boy howdy, it was shitty. OK, well, maybe not AS shitty as some people made it out to be, but it definitely couldn't hold a candle to the original, or even Ghostbusters 2. Shit, even The Real Ghostbusters cartoon was better than it. In any case, you can see how shitty it was by reading the Plot below, or torrenting a camrip on your favorite torrent server.
Just because there is a review embargo placed on a film, it doesn't mean the movie will be bad. Some of the more recent films that had review embargoes placed on them by their studio include Pixels, Superman v Batman: Dawn of Justice, Warcraft, and Fantastic Four, and they ALL turned out to be GREAT movies!
Well Sony Pictures placed a review embargo on Fembusters, which is one reason why the only articles about the movie have been about how sexist you are for disliking the movie. In fact, not only was there a the embargo was EXTENDED from the morning of Monday, July 11th, to later that evening, when the film is actually released in the UK.placed on the film, but
Of course, review embargoes aren't applied to anyone who has a GLOWING review of the movie, usually reviews which the studio paid for in order to get those review quotes used in their advertisements. For example:
But the fact that the number of reviews being released which break the embargo by being SUPER DUPER positive is basically zero... might spell a few things about the movie. But hey, don't let this suspicious situation stop you... you should be a good white male and purchase a ticket to the movie this Friday! Or better yet, why not just wait for a free ticket to come by in a box of your favorite cereal, pudding, or the Bluray packaging of the original Ghostbusters films?
See? Movies this good ALWAYS has people trying to give tickets away to see it.
Final reviews of Fembusters
After the Review Embargo was lifted on Monday, July 11th, actual reviews started to pour in. You can watch a carefully tailored selection of the review videos below, while some other reviews of particular note can be seen further down.
Basically the overall Reviews can be summed into three camps:
- Sony shills which gave the movie disproportionately high scores
- Anti-Sony warriors which deliberately gave the movie a poor score just to offset the high scores given by shills
- Even-headed reviewers that realized that this movie isn't BAD, but is definitely a far cry from the original Ghostbusters.
As it turns out, the third camp is basically the consensus for the film. It's not as bad as people said it was, but it also isn't the SAVIOR OF FEMINISM that SJWs want it to be. It's about as good as Pixels, and just as memorable.
A carefully tailored selection of review videos
The first proper review video ever, by Wreckless Eating
Long story short, these reviews basically confirmed a number of things we all knew, but also a few other things which are new to this story:
- It's shitty... I mean, it's REALLY shitty. REALLLLLY FUCKING SHITTY
- Men are stupid
- Paul Feig is officially a nu-male, because the entire film is nothing but man/self-hating nonsense
- All the male characters are rude, crude, and/or otherwise irredeemable
- Feminism = hating on men (because pushing men down means women are elevated)
- There is ZERO chemistry between the actresses
- The effects are straight out of Scooby-Doo
- Greenscreens are used to a ridiculous degree
- The Times Square scene literally looks like they're play fighting in front of said greenscreen
- Even though the original film was about GHOSTS and the supernatural, it still all seemed plausible, and the film still treated the material seriously; frankly, that was part of what made it so funny. But in Fembusters, EVERYONE was "in on the joke": they all acted like they KNEW they were in a stupid situation and never took it seriously.
- Finally, while we all knew that the Ghostbusters logo was going to be the bad guy, we DIDN'T know was that, to defeat it, it gets shot in the dick.
Speaking of the Ghostbusters logo getting shot in the dick... think back to the so-called Ghostbusters fan event Sony held, where the official video of the event had a ton of fans say ridiculous shit like "the franchise is in good hands; they honored its legacy", etc. And yet the movie had scenes like that where women are shooting the literal icon of the Ghostbusters franchise in the crotch. So it kinda puts what was said into perspective, huh? Paul Feig TRULY DOES honor the legacy of Ghostbusters. By shooting it in the dick. That'll show those other Ghostbusters fans for their passionate response to the changes in Fembusters!
Of course this shit shouldn't surprise anyone, considering that the filmmakers straight up publicized the fact that they've included at least one scene where they dig at reviewers and fans and other people IRL:
That's right: instead of taking the higher road and just make a movie that stands on its own merit, they just HAD to throw in some of the most childish response to anyone giving them shit... by showing how much they AREN'T bothered by people giving them shit. THAT'LL show them how much they're not letting their haters get under their skin... those poopy-smelling 45-year old man children don't bother us one bit!!!!!
Sony Gives Themselves A Positive Review
One of the first positive reviews that appeared on YouTube was this review, by.
OK hey, sure, a positive review of the movie was almost an inevitability. And hey, maybe this guy legitimately enjoyed the film. No accounting for taste, but they do at least have the right to have their own opinions.
But some eagle eyed viewers at Furious Fanboys noticed a few issues with the video. Like how this person never actually reviewed another movie before. Or that the account was created right around when Fembusters started production. Or how the account only has 350-ish subscribers, but somehow managed to gain access to an official Sony screening of the movie. And there are pictures of the reviewer with Paul Feig on his Twitter.
That's right: Sony actually produced a positive review of the movie themselves. Yes, they are THAT desperate. This wasn't the first time Sony Pictures did something like this: they invented a critic by the name of David Manning in order to give Sony's movies positive quotes to use in their advertisements. Sony ultimately was sued over this and lost (no surprise).
Critics vs. Audience
Meanwhile, until actual box office returns are made available for Fembusters, both sides will continue to try to paint Fembusters to be whatever they want it to be. Sony shills and SJWs will try to make Fembusters sound like it's better than the original Ghostbusters, while haters of the film will try to make it sound like it's the worst 1980's related movie since the Jem and the Holograms.
Well, whatever the haters think, it doesn't change the fact that most of the high scoring reviews of Fembusters actually DO come from reviewers with a clear bias towards the movie, Sony, or against those who dislike the film. This reddit post, which has since been deleted, started off with "Tldr all positive reviews are SJW feminist shills." and follows up with the story behind the reviews. Basically, anyone who previously defended the movie from "misogynist haters" or "otherwise [turned] it into a political issue" would NEVER give it a negative review in the slightest. For example:
- Stephanie Zacharek (TIME) wrote the article Why Ghostbusters Is the Must-See Movie of the Summer Season , and in it wrote:
- "The misogynist outrage over the Ghostbusters remake has made it essential viewing"
Long story short, pretty much all positive reviewers are from people who are biased from the beginning to give the film a high score, because their "official score"---which is based on their own opinion---proves that the haters were wrong. Obviously!
How The IMDB Median Went From 2 to 7 In A Few Days
On the, the IMDB score for Ghostbusters was an average of , lulz. And for a good long while it stayed at a score around 4, around 5 higher than this shit deserves. But out the blue, and totally coincidental this movie went from a 2 to a 7. Nothing going on here.
Previous Image | Next Image
Empty theaters and weekend returns
OK so, maybe haters of Fembusters ARE nothing more than a bunch of 45-year old misogynist dudebros who still live at home. At least they won't be clogging up the theater and ruining your Fembusters experience when you finally get to watch it, right? Well, as it turns out, not only has there been no 45-year old misogynist dudebros clogging theaters, there also has been no ANYONES clogging theaters. Like, literally NO ONE has been lining up to watch Fembusters.
Yep, that's right. For all the hard work SJWs and Feminists put into defending Ghostbusters from the legions of haters and dudebros, they ended up showed their support for the movie by.... staying home and not watching it at all. This is what artists, companies, etc, don't seem to understand, but it's been proven time and time again: there is NO reward in catering to SJWs and Feminists, because they have no concept of "voting with their wallet". They will NEVER reward you for doing the right thing, because---among other things---as far as they're concerned, that's what you're SUPPOSED to do in the first place, and so why reward someone for doing just that?
Anyways, because of all the tickets that SJWs and Feminists have bought, Fembusters made a mere $17.2 million on its first day, and is currently on track to make $45 million by the end of the weekend. This will NOT put it in first for the weekend, with The Secret Lives of Pets making more, despite it being in its second weekend. By the next weekend, Fembusters will likely fall further down the list, as movies like Star Trek Beyond (a movie made by a company that actually APPRECIATES their fans) and Ice Age: Collision Course (a movie with far more kid appeal than Fembusters' dick smashing jokes) will steal its spotlight. In fact, despite only costing $144 million to make, Paul Feig said that the movie would need to make $500 million to be worth anything, let alone justify all their other plans, such as a sequel, a MCU-style multiverse film series, toys and merchandising deals, etc. At this rate, their $500 million goal will NEVER happen.
To put it in perspective, Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice made $81.5 million on its first day, a total of $166 million over its first weekend, and a total of $330 million domestically... and it was STILL considered a failure. True, BvS cost $250 million, but it's still made more pound-for-pound than Fembusters has and probably ever will.
Now none of this should surprise anyone behind Fembusters: they created this outcome by shitting on their fans. They treated the movie as a zero-sum game---in order for women to win, men MUST lose---and they are merely reaping their rewards. But hey, at least they still have their honor and made the movie on THEIR terms without giving into the demands of the haters. GRRL POWER!!
Final Theater Numbers
Now that the movie has been out for almost a month now and almost weekeneds worth of numbers have been released for it, what is the final verdict for how well Fembusters did? Easy: IT'S A ROARING SUCCESS!!!! ... Yep, the movie has had THOUSANDS UPON THOUSANDS of supportive people on social media send messages to Paul Feig about how much they liked it, little girls are dressing up as Ghostbusters (because it was PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE for a little girl to dress up in a Ghostbusters costume before Fembusters), and it has a good rating on Rotten Tomatoes... and that's all that matters, right? But all that aside, the most important way to gauge Fembusters' success is:
That's right! It took nearly three weeks to do it, but Fembusters FINALLY made back its entire budget, and so this movie is NOT a flop according to this definition! The haters have been BTFO!!
...I mean, this IS how movie finances work, right? Like, $144 million is the ONLY money Sony put into Fembusters from start to finish, right? It's not like Sony spent nearly the same amount of money on advertising Fembusters, like paying licensees to add Ghostbusters-related material into their products, or that movie theaters don't get a sizable cut of their ticket sales to, y'know, keep the theater in business, or that movie are supposed to make an actual profit, or international ticket sales are even more complex... naw, none of that is involved here. Sony made ALL of their money back on Fembusters, plus just a bit of profit to sweeten the deal... and that just means WOMEN WON and MEN LOST!!! EAT SHIT MEN!!! In fact, let's see what Paul Feig himself has to say about all the money Fembusters made (or needs to make) for his efforts to be worth while:
...uh... no, he's wrong. The movie is a success because I said so. Paul Feig doesn't know what he's talking about by saying that the movie would need to make at least $500 million for it to be at least SOMEWHAT worthwhile. This movie has been successful, and that's that!
But seriously though, with things going the way they're going now, they're not gonna make anywhere close to Feig's dream of $500 million. Let's look at the numbers:
First off, most films make about 45% of their total revenue within the first week of release, about 90% within the four weeks, and about 95% within six. Fembusters, as of August 6th, 2016, is nearing the end of Week 4 with $163 million. It had over 50% drops on Week 2 and 3, and lost over 900 theaters by Week 3, which is A LOT. Shit, it lost 6% of its theaters in Week TWO, which is something you don't see very often. Finally, its domestic/foreign split is about 70/30, which is usually something you see only with real stinkers. At the rate it's going, it'll probably reach around $180 million by the time it's finally pulled from all theaters. Of course, this is also not taking into account other money Sony dumped into Fembusters; advertising the money is NOT counted in its production budget, and tends to be about the same amount, if not more; some people have estimated as much as $200 million has been spent advertising Fembusters. There's also the fact that movie theaters themselves take around 25% of the ticket sales... which still isn't enough to keep the theaters in business, which is why popcorn and soda is so fucking expensive.
$180 million made from a $144 million budget. That's a $36 million, or 25%, profit. And Sony doesn't even get to pocket all of that to begin with. But hey, that guy up above to thinks a movie isn't a flop as long as it made its budget back might have point! In that case, let's look at a list of other successful movies which has made at least made their budget back:
|Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer||2007||$130m||$289m||$159m||122.3%|
|The Amazing Spider-Man||2012||$230m||$757.9m||$527.9m||229.52%|
|Man of Steel||2013||$225m||$668m||$443m||196.89%|
|The Amazing Spider-Man 2||2014||$246.5m||$709m||$462.5m||187.63%|
|Fantastic Four (FANT4STIC)||2015||$120m||$168m||$48m||40%|
|Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice||2016||$250m||$872.7m||$622.7m||249.08%|
YEEAAHHHHH!!! Take a look at all these successful movies!! NONE of them were flops, because they ALL made their budgets back! They all ended up becoming major multi-billion dollar franchises for their studios.... right?
Well, Sony is going to try to spin this to their advantage. That Houston Press article above certainly tried to; it tried to equate the ORIGINAL Ghostbusters' success to Fembusters' apparently rosy future:
Yep, this is EXACTLY why the success of the Marvel Cinematic Universe has encouraged Sony to make The Amazing Spider-Man 3, especially after the "rising tide" lifted the success of The Amazing Spider-Man 2. Or Nintendo's success has lifted the success off Pixels so much that Pixels 2 is sure to be an rousing success AND the start of a multi-billion dollar "Pixels" franchise. Ghostbusters is TOTALLY going to make Sony mad cash because all the success that.... two films made some 30 years ago has brought them.
Face it Fembusters Supporters, Fembusters isn't the SMASHING THE PATRIARCHY success you want it to be. It's also not the "WORST MOVIE EVER OF 20XX!". It's just a less-than-mediocre film which was meant to be easily consumed and forgotten like a bad meal. You guys shit all over Capitalism, but you don't realize how much of a shill you are for Sony; they only created that "MUH FEMINISM" angle just to trick people into watching an otherwise shitty film, and you got baited by them very easily, hook-line-and-sinker.
Speaking of Sony manipulating the situation to generate interest...
So you've finally accepted that you're a sexist, misogynistic shitbag pissbaby dudebro man-child
As it has been mentioned, if you don't like this movie, you're sexist, you hate women, and all that wonderful stuff. Because as it turns out, Fembusters is finally a movie that has females in the lead roles, and all the negativity against the movie is because pissbaby dudebro man-children are finally feeling what it's like to have a movie NOT cater to male fans by having a male lead. Y'know, because there has NEVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER been a movie with female leads that men can still enjoy none the less.
Your comments are problematic
Actually, as it so happens, this is actually the narrative that Sony Pictures and Paul Feig & Co. are intentionally trying to cultivate. Sony clearly knows Fembusters is utter shit, which is probably why they set up that "fan-appreciation (read: propaganda) event" in the first place: to try to manipulate the opinions of Ghostbusters fans that ALL IS WELL. Too bad the shitty trailer has only convinced more Ghostbusters fans that the movie is fucked. So in order to gain sympathy from the only people Sony Pictures and Friends have left who might spend money on their shitty movie---namely Feminists, tumblrinas, and other SJWs---they're doing whatever they can to really drive the point home that the only people who hate it are racists and sexists and other bad people.
Therefore, Sony has undertaken a massive social media engineering campaign in order to maintain the narrative that the only people who speak negatively of the film are blatant sexists, racists, or other negative-ists... thus implying that anyone who has anything negative to say about the movie is a morally corrupt person. One way of maintaining this narrative is by carefully deleting a shitton of comments on YouTube, leaving only the truly terrible comments which Sony hopes "speaks for themselves". So, if you happen to be:
- a female who thinks this movie is shit (bonus points if you're homosexual, TRANSEXUAL, or anyone else further down the Oppression Hierarchy and you still think the movie is shit)
- a Liberal male who openly loves female leads but simply didn't like the trailer
- a non-white person who thinks that they didn't go far enough in being progressive
- basically anyone who isn't otherwise sucking Sony's dick by playing along with their charade (free PS4s for anyone who Upvotes the Trailer video and leaves a positive review!)
...then you're going against the narrative that Sony and Company is trying to maintain, and you can thus guarantee that your comments will be eventually deleted. Enjoy it while it lasts! In any case, you shouldn't be posting those kinds of comments to begin with... why would you WANT to side with the racist sexist shitlords??
The problem with this plan is that it's just too damned obvious. Just take a look at what other people have written about this plan:
This video further explains the plan and the rationale behind it in greater detail.
As you can see, by doing this, Sony Pictures and Friends have an out; no matter how poorly the movie does, everyone involved in the movie will simply blame its failure on the Patriarchy holding them back. You see, by carefully deleting the comments that either goes against their narrative or tries to expose it, the remaining negative comments are all the misogynistic and racist ones (which there is no guarantee that social media engineers on Sony's payroll themselves didn't write those comments themselves), and so it becomes extremely easy to blame the Patriarchy for all their woes. I mean, don't you see how 100% of the negative comments on the trailer is misogynistic and racist?? Anyways, just sit back, grab some popcorn, and watch it play out in this way.
Oh, and something else to consider: Youtube now has an automated system wherein, shorty after being posted, many comments are automatically flagged as spam and hidden and it is up to the owner of the video to choose whether they would like to unhide them. This means that for the critical comments to vanish and the offensive ones to remain (they way they seemingly are), someone at Sony would have to manually go over their spam inbox and hand pick all racist and misogynistic comments to have them be made visible again, while knowingly ignoring intelligent posts that the automatic system mistakenly marked as spam (or perhaps even going a step further to manually delete ones it didn't).
You Lose with S-J-double-yoose
But it's not like there's a million different reason why this movie sucks. Naw, it's totally because of all the pissbaby shitlord trolls who are afraid of strong women characters, and not because:
- this movie is obviously nothing more than an unnecessary nostalgia cash grab
- the lack of originality in writing (almost literally the same movie as the 1984 original, down to the same main characters)
- for all the talk about how progressive this movie is, the main cast is still three white people saving the world AGAIN, along with their useless stereotypically sassy forced comic relief black friend
- the apparent hypocrisy of Feminists hating the "dumb female secretary" character type, only to love the "dumb male secretary" character type, as depicted by Chris Hemsworth in this film
- the very idea that Sony was going to sue Bill Murray if he didn't appear in a cameo (click for more info)
Yeah, none of those reasons plays a part in why people almost universally loathe this movie. Instead, it's TOTALLY because the Patriarchy hates women.
Of course we all know that the stupid part in all this is that, it's a lost cause trying to appeal to Feminists, SJWs and their ilk to begin with. SJWs don't realize how much money influences things, so "speaking with their wallet" (that is, showing their support through the spending of their own money) is an utterly foreign concept to these people, unless they're supporting lazy idiots on Patreon. To make matters worse, these kind of people are never happy, always finding fault with every attempt to appeal to them. Like, you would think that a movie with 100% of the lead cast being women, the male supporting character is a dim-witted meathead, AND three other ways the Ghostbusters movie smashes the "Patriarchy", this would be something that EVERY feminist and their friends would love unconditionally, right? Nope.
You see? Patty---the ONLY non-white Ghostbuster---is depicted as nothing more than a stereotypical ghetto black woman, and not a scientist, and that's "problematic" to many people. And right there underlines the common thread in ANY attempt to appeal to Feminists, SJWs, and their ilk: even when 99% is exactly what they want, the 1% that is wrong is enough to encourage these people to criticize your efforts, maybe even boycott it outright. They will ALWAYS find something that they find "problematic" and not spend a single penny on that something as a way to signal their discontent.
So instead of making a movie that wins over actual long time fans, creates new fans, AND generates more interest (and further sales) of the original Ghostbusters movies and TV series, Sony Pictures, Paul Feig and Friends are left with a movie that hardly a single Ghostbuster fan NOR a triggered SJW will spend a red cent on. By trying to appeal to SJWs, you fail by default, and no one wins in the end.
As it turns out, Sony didn't like the idea of making Kate McKinnon's character a lesbian. Because having a lesbo in a DESTROY-THE-PATRIARCHY movie is just too much.
The first joke of the movie is a queef. No, we are not making that up. And of course, vomits ectoplasm on Erin. Abby records the encounter, with a Sony cam, gotta get that product placement in there, including a terrified Erin claiming that ghosts are real, and uploads it to YouTube and reddit, leading to Erin being fired. Abby then persuades Erin to join her and Jillian in opening a ghost-chasing business they call "Ghostbusters".Erin Gilbert (Kristen Wiig), a physics teacher at Empire State University, has her opportunity to receive tenure jeopardized when her old friend, amateur paranormal researcher Abby Yates (Melissa McCarthy), publishes a book they wrote together several years young, positing the existence of ghosts. Erin visits Abby and her new partner, nuclear researcher Jillian Holtzman (Kate McKinnon), to ask Abby to remove her name from the book, and is persuaded by Abby and Jillian to accompany them to the Aldridge Hotel to investigate claims of paranormal activity. Arriving there, the trio encounters the ghost of Madame Aldridge, the hotel's late owner, who
Meanwhile, subway worker Patty Tolan (Leslie Jones) runs into Rowan (Neil Casey), a nerd who got bullied hard, like the fans of the original Ghostbusters, who has created a machine that amplifies paranormal activity, intending to open a breach between the world of the living and the world of the dead and release an army of ghosts to destroy the human race. After an encounter with a ghost that Rowan releases on the subway system, Patty seeks the Ghostbusters and volunteers to become a member and lend her street-smarts to the team. They also hire a dim-witted receptionist, Kevin (Chris Hemsworth), and set up a base of operations in a Chinese restaurant and two vehicles, Ecto-1, a hearse lent to them by Patty's uncle; and Ecto-2, an old motorcycle.
Despite the government's attempts to discredit them, the Ghostbusters become increasingly popular as they capture more ghosts unleashed by Rowan, and ultimately confront Rowan himself, who chooses to commit suicide rather than let himself be captured. With his death, paranormal activity in NYC subsides, adding credence to the government's claims about the Ghostbusters. Going through Rowan's belongings, Erin and Abby learn Rowan attended the same school as them and his obsession with ghosts was born out of their own fascination with the subject.
Rowan returns as a ghost and swears revenge on the Ghostbusters, possessing Abby and attempting to kill Jillian. After Patty beats him out of Abby's body, Rowan possesses Kevin, steals the Ecto-2 and heads to Times Square, where he activates a second machine he had secretly built, opening a portal between the two worlds and raising an army of ghosts that begin wreaking havoc in New York City, while also powering up Rowan's ectoplasmic form. To display his dominance over them, Kevin/Rowan leads the ghosts in
a performance of "You Should Be Dancing" by the Bee Gees. This was cut out in the final cut.
The Ghostbusters intervene despite the government's attempts to stop them, venturing into the evacuated area in the Ecto-1, and Erin manages to exorcise Rowan out of Kevin's body. Rowan demands that the Ghostbusters choose a form for him, and Patty absent-mindely thinks of a spraypainted ghost she saw on the subway line. Rowan becomes a towering version of the graffiti ghost and begins rampaging.
Did we mention that government actually believes the Fembusters, but are
cockvagblocking them every step of the way for no other reason than the plot says so?
The Ghostbusters fail to defeat him by crossing their streams, and instead Erin and Abby venture into the portal, with ropes tied around their waists, and trick Rowan into directing his forces into the portal. Jillian and Patty then close it, but manage to pull Erin and Abby out, while Rowan and his army become trapped in the world of the dead and Rowan's machine is destroyed.
The government once again discredits the Ghostbusters and they don't receive any recognition for saving the city, but manage to use their savings to buy a new base of operations in an old firehouse. Erin and Kevin develop a relationship, and while analyzing tape recordings during the battle against Rowan, during which paranormal activity was at its peak, Patty finds several cryptic warning about the arrival of Zuul.
During the credits, the remainder of the Times Square dance scene, which the studio made Feig cut for time, is played out in full. Feig, being butthurt that his precious dance number had to get cut up, finally got the last laugh.
- Erin Gilbert (Kristen Wiig) - A wooden cutout with a frowny face drawn on it, splattered with mysterious goo.
- Abby Yates (Melissa McCarthy) - Playing every other role she has played previously. Only worser.
- Jillian Holtzman (Kate McKinnon) - Coke-addled lesbian. Oh wait, her character? Unfunny wannabe mad-scientist.
- Patty Tolan (Leslie Jones) - A nigger who nigs. Despite this character flaw of being a nigger, is perhaps the most likeable person in this schlock.
- Rowan (Neil Casey) - Brainless piece of eye candy written by sexists. Even worse, the film admits to this on screen.
- Other bodily functions
- The weapon is TOO STRONK! Oh noes! (Done at least four times.)
- Pointing out how dumb/useless the male characters are.
- Ripping off or "referencing" scenes from better movies
- Ripping off the "The power of X compels you" from The Exorcist
- Abby saying "Say hello to my little friend"
- Slimer randomly appears in a food cart but has no backstory or anything onscreen so he's unfunny.
That's the jokes. Nothing but lowest common denominator. Even Adam Sandler would be ashamed of this.
In order to grab as much Jew gold as possible, the shills at Sony will need to drag as many idiots to the theaters to watch this shitshow on the silver screen for $10 a pop, instead of using it as background to Netflix and chill at home. This means offering the following rich people (except for the wise Rick Moranis and the dead Harold Ramis unknown enticements to cameo, which apparently will cause nostalgic people to cough up ten dollars instead of staying home in droves:
- Bill Murray as a skeptic who questions the Ghostbusters on the news, and is killed by one of Rowan's ghosts.
- Dan Aykroyd as a taxi driver who refuses to obey the evacuation order during Rowan's attack, claiming "I ain't afraid of no ghosts!"
- Ernie Hudson as Patty's uncle who lends the Ghostbusters the Ecto-1.
- Annie Potts as a receptionist at the hotel Rowan works, who answers calls by saying "whadoyawant".
- Sigourney Weaver as Jillian's disapproving mentor who comes to respect her career choice in the end.
- Harold Ramis will appear as an actual ghost.
- Slimer appears together with his new wife. Ms. Slimer.
- Rick Moranis was wise enough to back the fuck off this abortion, stating "But it just makes no sense to me. Why would I do just one day of shooting on something I did 30 years ago?" For a tiny man in glasses he has some serious balls because Sony was willing to play dirty if the better film's stars did not do a cameo.
APPEAR OR YOU'LL GET SUED
In a shocking turn of events, it seems that the actual Ghostbusters had to appear in the movie, if they did not want to get their asses sued. An e-mail got leaked by wikileaks, that clearly describes how they should appear in the movie, or else.
Better Female Ghostbusters
The better remake (The porn)
General videos about Fembusters, etc
Reactions from original Ghostbusters cast and crew
- Crystal Head Vodka - This movie is just a commercial for Dan's awful drinkable bleach in a gay bottle
- MST3K - Wait for their inevitable mockery of this failure
- Angry Video Game Nerd - Was harassed by the feminist media for daring to not see this movie
- The Big Bang Theory - Where they will get all their "jokes"
- Irate Gamer - His Ghost Hunters is more Ghostbusters than this
- Leaked Sony Email detailing stupid musical number
- ED Forum discussion about the trailer and film
- Original Tufts Medical Center Tweet
- No release in China. Overseas BO will not bail this stinker out.
- Gay card played.
- Shitty Buzzfeed article telling people to spend a shitload of money to support this dogshit.
- Video summary of everything that went wrong with this movie and its production.
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