⚠️ Encyclopedia Dramatica is currently being restored by automated scripts ⚠️

There's been a lot of questions as to what's going on with the site and what comes next. So we have this (ordered) roadmap of what's being worked on and what's to come. This will be updated until the roadmap is complete as Æ has a lot of missing features and ideas that I'd like to fix in regards to its offerings before I implement big plans for the site's popularity and well-being in 2021.

Æ Roadmap

  • Content restoration (Mostly done, few things missing that will be restored sporadically)
  • Image restoration (Being run in background, nothing I can do cept wait)
  • Æ Imageboard (Currently being worked on)
  • Mediawiki upgrade and backend fixes
  • .onion domain for Tor-friendly editing and viewing
  • CSS overhaul (Fixing things like the videos on mobile, and overall a rehaul of the wiki's look to be more friendly to readers)
  • Paid bounty board for new articles (Won't be managed by me for legal reasons however I will ensure it runs smoothly)
  • Anonymous phone # service for those seeking ban evades from Twitter as well as a phone number not tied to their name (more details at launch)

  • Currently we are nearing our annual LLC renewal fee ($650) as well throwing the funds required for these other changes and aspects. If you would like to support Æ consider purchasing a copy of The Hustler's Bible or securing some Merch. Donating is also appreciated however I would rather give something back as per the two options above.

    If you have any questions you can join our public Telegram chat to DM me privately or @ me in chat.

    You can also email me via [email protected]

    Merch notes: Thank you to all who have purchased merch. We will ship late January or mid February depending on our provider's speed.

    Here's to setting the world on fire in 2021! - aediot



    Elgorgo

    From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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    File:S320x320.jpg
    Elgorgo is a fucking fat fuck and an asshole.

    File:Lj-favicon.png elgorgo is a friendless basement-dwelling fattie who is obsessed with the internet. He spends 20 hours a day online and even has a laptop next to the toilet. He is incapable of maintaining friendships or having any sort of normal human emotion. He is overrated, dangerous and untalented.

    In the early years of the LiveJournal, Elgorgo enjoyed moderate internet popularity. However, as the site grew, Elgorgo's journal became less entertaining and more frightening, culminating in a series of psychotic Andy Kaufman-like pranks.

    Elgorgo is not a nice guy. If he is nice to you it is because he is secretly plotting against you.

    "Everyone in this community is a fucker and I hate them"

    File:Elgorgoandcat.jpg
    Photo of Elgorgo often sent to camwhores as a means to woo them. He actually looks more like the photo above.

    In 2001 Elgorgo turned a popular meme into a popular community, fucklist. In the primordial ooze of early LiveJournal, users were desperate for any kind of lemming-like activity to fall in line with. The official point of the community was for users to make a list of other LiveJournal users they wanted to fuck. The actual point of the community was to annoy and frustrate community members with a shifting set of illogical rules, long-rambling paranoid accusations and random banhammers.

    To say that Elgorgo was malsuited for any kind of management or community involvement would be an understatement.

    After relentlessly harassing a camwhore for spamming the community, LJ Abuse took the community from Elgorgo and put it under the management of the abuse team leader at the time, tommyx. An oversight or a glitch in the system allowed Elgorgo maintainer access to the community months later. Unaware that tommyx was the head of abuse, Elgorgo removed his maintainer status and banned him from the community.

    The next day, Elgorgo found himself suspended from LiveJournal.

    A long, arduous e-mail campaign was launched and eventually the suspension was overturned by God himself.

    A Pathetic Life

    File:Egbingo.jpg
    Based on a short-lived meme created by an Saljer, this "Internet Loser Bingo" board features Elgorgo's LiveJournal icon in the center.

    For all intensive purposes, Elgorgo's journal actually died near the end of 2002. With the advent of assembly line trolling, sex-work writers and weird news aggregators, Elgorgo's stale act was stinking up the place. Any residual e-fame from the lj abuse debacle faded quickly in the minds of fickle readers.

    To make matters more hilarious, Elgorgo's longtime girlfriend (also a LiveJournal user) left him for a lesbian she met on - you guessed it - LiveJournal. She left with the cats and told him to never contact her again, which of course he did anyway because he is a pathetic internet stalker.

    Shortly after being dumped, Elgorgo lost his mid-salary Research & Development cubicle job and his mind. Elgorgo was not only a loser on the internet, but in the real world as well! Living on the dole for 6 months, he wrote about nothing outside of his lesbian ex-girlfriend, Dungeons & Dragons and the pornography he rented from the 24-hour store around the corner.

    Didn't You Die?

    In August 2004, Elgorgo changed his journal into a character journal (see Billiam, Flashman, Ghostlight), featuring incredibly believable stories about getting in fist-fights at the gas station and being asked to participate in homosexual chubby chaser porn.

    The month-long series ended with his fake death. Nothing was posted regarding the death in his journal, but Elgorgo's friends-list mobilized to spread the rumor all over LiveJournal. This caused unfunny users unfamiliar with Elgorgo much confusion, even going so far as attempting to sleuth out his IRL hometown, father's obituary and call the local funeral homes.

    Sadly, the internet detectives got the name of the town wrong. Even worse, Elgorgo was not actually dead. Worst of all, he had more readers than ever. The shark had been jumped, but the journal kept trundling on, it's best days far behind.

    Fake LJer

    Elgorgo is not a real person. Here is the proof:

    • No one knows his real name.
    • No one knows where he lives
    • No one has ever met him IRL
    • Claims to have a son named "Aiden"
    • No real photos of him have ever been seen
    • He has never been a member of MENSA or the RPGA.
    • Whenever he says something to me that I don't agree with, he is trolling me.
    • His MySpace account is located here: Elgorgo's MySpace account

    This proves that Elgorgo does not exist.

    He will ruin everything

    Elgorgo ruined Pokey the Penguin.

    Whenever it appears that Elgorgo is schmoozing with internet superstars, watchdogs will immediately launch a preemptive campaign (including both signed and anonymous e-mails) to keep Elgorgo out of any position of power, including: moderator, administrator, cocksucker, or bureaucrat.

    This is because Elgorgo will ruin everything. Everyone on the internet knows this.

    An example:

    Elgorgo: I like that Ljdrama site can I write for it?
    Hepkitten: Suck a million cocks you boring choad!
    Elgorgo: YEAH WELL I'M TOO GOOD FOR IT ANYWAY.
    Hepkitten: By the hoary anarchist gods, you totally suck.
    
    Elgorgo: Oh Encyclopedia Dramatica is so awesome. Can I become a moderator?
    Anonymous Pussy: OMG GV Don't let him have anything to do with it 
                     he will ruin everything!
    

    Despite a penchant to ruin everything, Elgorgo briefly wrote articles for Ljdrama until the group broke up. He has been banned from Rant about cons, LJers for president, Salj, Idis, Nonuglygeeks and is mostly ignored in any other community he posts to.

    In addition to most of the internet, feminists, lesbians, and the former members of Salj (known as Saljers) do not find Elgorgo funny.

    Contrary to popular belief, Elgorgo is not a troll. Trolls are much smarter.

    Illiterate

    A hilarious thing happens whenever Elgorgo tries to pwn someone on the internet: in his fat angry rage, he will omit important words reveal himself idiot is. This is possibly caused by his delicate fat-fingered condition which keeps him from hitting all the necessary keys.

    See also

    External Links

    • elgorgo [SUSPENDED]
    • _gobo_ (Gobo Winkler was briefly given control of Elgorgo's LiveJournal} [SUSPENDED]