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Æ Roadmap

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    Demockery

    From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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    Democracy (Russian: dermokratiya, trans: "shit-ocracy")is the act of finding those least capable, qualified, and morally fit for the task of governing and giving them the authority to govern. Many people believe that Democracy = freedom, but in truth, democracy is yet more proof the average human cannot think for itself. People living in a democratic government have collars and leashes just like everyone else -- just their collars are looser and their leashes are longer.

    Demockery in a bun


    Examples of Democracy

    • Athens - Effete boy-benders in miniskirts. Big on freedom, while keeping slaves. Killed Socrates. Later conquered by macho kingdom of Spartaaaaaaaaa FTW.
    • Russia - Ultra-capitalist sham democracy run by gangsters and spooks. The inhabitants are intrinsically good, freedom-loving, God-fearing people who tend towards melancholia, madness and alcoholism. Prone to wearing ugly, gay track suits.
    • France - Once-proud kingdom overthrown by psychotic, atheistic democrats. Like to think that they invented democracy. Winless in division play since 1812.
    • England - Cider-swilling chav trash whose incomprehensible "Westminster democracy" keeps government as inefficient as possible while ensuring that the worst elements of society have most of the power. Exported democracy to Australia by brutally exterminating the primitive communism that was previously prevalent, and also by brutally exterminating the primitive communists.
    • Good Korea - Government by slanty-eyed ching-chong men. Survives presence of bloodthirsty psychotic next door by making good stuff and selling cheaply enough so that American importers, distributors, wholesalers and retailers can mark it up for huge profits. Oddly, the same strategy is used to maintain totalitarianism in China. This apparent contradiction cannot be explained.
    • Japan - Democratic since 1945. Teeming hive of demure babes and castrated shemales with no concept of real democracy; more like a nest of ants than a country. "Democratic" due to defeat and occupation by white people; once we're all gone, it's back to samurai swords and boilings in oil.
    • India - The "world's largest democracy", in actuality a nest of curry-reeking wogs ruled by the same upper-caste types that have always run the show. A country of 1.2 billion, in which "everybody has a voice". Riiiiiggggght.
    • South Africa - Majority rule means that only black Africans can be given jobs because the ANC is still mad about Apartheid. It also means that Chinese are black.
    • Denmark - All centrist moderate parties have been assraped by ultranationalist nazi-bitch Pia Kjærgsgaard and obey her smallest wishes (she now wants to pass a law that woud ban all immigration form non-western countries). Besides danish extreme-capitalist Mærsk writes letters to the danish government frequently, and they are answered.
    • United States of America - Gigantic multicultural empire comprised of ruthless, self-centered, mongrel savages with nuclear weapons. Essentially ungovernable by any means, the U.S.A. maintains a pseudo-democracy for TV purposes — a "representative republic" in which a handful of corporate executives and their political toadies really run the show. Currently administered by bleeding heart Liberals (i.e. gullible and self-hating types) led by Black Jesus, who are advised on matters political and economic by a consensus of niggers. Primary task of U.S. government is taking money away from people who work and giving it to the hordes of Negroes, Mexicans, and old people to keep them from rioting. Current policies include spending a billion dollars a week in a futile attempt to bring democracy to Iraq, a billion dollars a month in a futile attempt to bring democracy to Afghanistan, and a trillion each month trying to keep the Man with money for upkeep of his 140 feet yacht — each a task akin to attempting to teach calculus to an ape. A perfect historical example of working democracy in America is the treatment of Negroes at the hands of the white majority.

    Contra-examples of Democracy

    Gallery


    Demockery
    is part of a series on Politics.
    Ideologies: [You are wrong!We are right!]

    Alt-rightAnarchyCapitalismCentrismCommunismConservatismDemocratHippieLiberalismLibertarianismMiltopismNaziNihilismNeo-conPacifismRepublicanReconquistaSocialismStoner GuruTory

    Issues: [Fuck it, Too lazy.Get it fixed!]

    AbortionArab SpringBahrainBarron TrumpBirthCISPADeath penaltyDrugsEnvironmentalismGaysGeorge Bush doesn't care about black peopleGirlfriendsMarijuana AddictionGround Zero MosqueMarijuana AddictionMass ShootingGun controlGunsHealthcare (2) (3)• HomelessHousing CrisisHuntingIceslaveIranMarriageMiller TestMiltopiaNAUPimpin'RacismShoesTaxesTerrorismUnemploymentWarWelfare

    Politicians: [Rigging Elections is funVote for me]

    AhmadinejadAkinB.AllenG. AllenAngleAshburnBachmannBhuttoBin LadenBlagojevichBlairBoehnerG.BrownS.BrownBunningJim TraficantDubya BushGeorge H. W. BushBurrByrdCainCameronChavezCheCheneyChomskyChretienChurchillClintonClinton IIChelsea Clinton Hillary Clinton CleggCohenColemanCorbynCowgerCraigCthulhuCunninghamCurtisD'AlemaDeanDelayDuterteDwyerEdwardsFaganFiorinaFoleyGerald FordRob FordGellerGillardGingrichGiulianiGonzalesGoreGrahamGravelGreeneGriffinHagueHansonHardingHarperHitlerHowardHuckabeeHusseinJacksonJamesJidetteJohnsonJohnson, BorisKennedyLaRoucheLBJLottKerryKindKissingerKucinichLewinskyLiebermanLimbaughLoughnerMajorMarceaux.comMarxMcBerryMcCainMcHenryMcKinneyMercerMichael BloombergMooreMorocco MoleMussoliniNaderNixonObamaO'DonnellOsbornePainePaladinoPalinPaulPelosiPencePerryPinochetPrittPutinQuahQuayleRasanskyReaganRendellRiceRobertsonRomneyRoveRuddRumsfeldRyanSaakashviliSandersSantorumSchumerSchwarzeneggerSharptonCyril SmithJacqui SmithSpitzerStevensStranahanSupremeTaitzThatcherThompsonThorleyTPMMuckraker MoleTrudeauTrumpVenturaVitterWarsiWashingtonWaxmanWeinerWestWilliamsWilsonWolfowitzXXenophon

    Parties: [No beer? Fuck that.Hell yeah, a party!]

    America's Third PartyBlack BlocDramacratic PartyHard PartyLemon PartyLiberal Party of AustraliaNorth American DONG PartyOBAMACORNSocialist Workers PartyPirate PartyZapatistas

    Tactics: [Rage Quit.How do I get elect?]

    2013 US Government ShutdownBlaming ChinaCaptain Nigga DefendaCloward Piven StrategyCuckservativesDemockeryDoomsday ClockG20 Toronto LollercaustLiberal Butthurt SyndromeLiberal guiltMacaca#NotMySuperbowlChampsOccupy DemocratsOperation LemonpartyRaped StatisticsThe ResistanceUpworthyWunderground

    See also: 2012 Elections2016 Presidential ElectionsInternet PoliticsPizzaGatePolitical communities