⚠️ Encyclopedia Dramatica is currently being restored by automated scripts ⚠️
There's been a lot of questions as to what's going on with the site and what comes next. So we have this (ordered) roadmap of what's being worked on and what's to come. This will be updated until the roadmap is complete as Æ has a lot of missing features and ideas that I'd like to fix in regards to its offerings before I implement big plans for the site's popularity and well-being in 2021.
Content restoration (Mostly done, few things missing that will be restored sporadically) Image restoration (Being run in background, nothing I can do cept wait)
Æ Imageboard (Currently being worked on)
Mediawiki upgrade and backend fixes
.onion domain for Tor-friendly editing and viewing
CSS overhaul (Fixing things like the videos on mobile, and overall a rehaul of the wiki's look to be more friendly to readers)
Paid bounty board for new articles (Won't be managed by me for legal reasons however I will ensure it runs smoothly)
Anonymous phone # service for those seeking ban evades from Twitter as well as a phone number not tied to their name (more details at launch)
Currently we are nearing our annual LLC renewal fee ($650) as well throwing the funds required for these other changes and aspects. If you would like to support Æ consider purchasing a copy of The Hustler's Bible or securing some Merch. Donating is also appreciated however I would rather give something back as per the two options above.
If you have any questions you can join our public Telegram chat to DM me privately or @ me in chat.
You can also email me via [email protected]
Merch notes: Thank you to all who have purchased merch. We will ship late January or mid February depending on our provider's speed.
Here's to setting the world on fire in 2021!
|40px||This article is about a furry, not a type of food.|
Candy, aka (cute_playful_wolf), is a seriously disturbing Down's Syndrome
patient fucktard who taps on keyboards and can move a mouse, despite profound mental retardation. She is exceedingly ugly, but refuses to allow her disgusting excuse for a visage act as a hindrance in her desire to be an amateur internet pornstar. Her ugliness was no impediment to Dani Faulk, who had sexual relations with her during his single attempt to be heterosexual.
Her notoriety generally stems from the shock that occurs when her long, foam-like flat breasts make their first appearance on webcam. They resemble a pair of clear gallon-size Ziplock bags that have been filled with Shit, piss and rotten furries. One can only imagine that the accompanying stench is comparable to something akin to a steeping brew of Gummi Bears, human waste, Mountain Dew, and balsamic vinegar.
From her poorly-lit bedroom in her aging parents home, and utilizing a cheaply purchased webcam, Candy performs various acts of self-gratification. These acts range from slapping her breasts with a nearby flyswatter to encouraging her toy poodles to dine on canned Dinty Moore Beef Stew that has been stuffed in her foul fuckparts.
All of this takes place in live web shows, much to the delight of of her two regular viewers.
As a child, Candy was quite adorable, and resembled one of the Olsen twins. It seems her genes were somehow spliced after allowing herself to be fucked by a Retarded horse with severe facial deformities. Passing on the genes of the horse, she sprouted an extensive cranial ridge. Mapping this ridge has become the subject of more than one Doctoral candidate's dissertation, but cannot be done because not even the strongest gas masks can keep the smell of human and dog waste, vomit, Animal jizz and dead furries.
Attempts to identify Candy using UCLA's usual nomenclature for classifying land mammals just barely makes the mark of primate, just sliding over into 'Plant' due to ugliness and the fact she never moves from her computer.
A Goldmine for Bacteriologists and Advanced Moneran Studies
Further studies have revealed that Candy plays host to vast colonies of parasitic, fungal, and bacterial life forms heretofore unknown on the planet (which proves the plant theory). These newly discovered creatures can be found within the folds of her flesh, apparently, but noone is enough of a sick fuck to check. Not even you
Defense against predators
When faced with an aggressor, she can emit an ear-piercing scream that has been known to shatter the inner ear of would-be predators. Candy is also known for wild changes in temperament in which she lashes out, unprovoked, in what some zoologists refer to as "an orgy of violent primate-like behavior". This is normally aimed at any male with enough decency to reject her. She has been seen on several occasions to hoot and posture while throwing fecal material at the object of her dismay.
Originally, Candy had tried to pose as "wolf kin", but was quickly rejected from the yiffing community after:
- Repeatedly shitting in her fur suit
- Looking like a retard
- Getting B& from /b/ for ugliness
- Tieing herself to her computer and refusing to leave until everyone faps to her
- Hitting the admin who tried to deroot 'her'. (Debatable, as 'she' may belong to the plant genus).
- Eating out of the toilet
- Going on Myspace
- Failing to create a Myspace account
- Mongling Cockmongler
Candy (furry) is part of a series on
Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage.
is part of a series on