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The meaning of life itself.
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The root of all bacons!

Bacon is a delicious variety of pig meat and the "B" in BLT. Although bacon can be found in almost any First World country, bacon is best known for this place on the American breakfast plate. Although bacon is often blamed for obesity and heart attacks, some mavericks amongst society recognize that bacon is good for you. No matter which position one takes on the bacon debate, none can deny the internet's fetish for bacon.

The Definitive Guide To Bacon

Maximizing the benefits of bacon can be tricky and is by no means an easy undertaking for the feint of heart. Attacking this conundrum of coronary Confucianism is this handy dandy, step wise guide to building a better life through bacon! Memorize these easy steps and you'll be well on your way to achieving a state of self-actualized bacon being.

Push Button; Receive Bacon

Push Button; Receive Bacon is a meme poking fun at the directions located on hand dryers. Some creative son of /b/ realized that the heat waves resembled strips of bacon and played on it. This person later brought his discovery onto the Internet, and parody images were born.

Bacony Faggotry

In 2012, a 22-year-old social media intern named Joshua Flaherty died of blood poisoning after shoving 10 pounds of bacon up his ass to win upvotes on Reddit, because he was obsessed with bacon and internet memes like baconmania. No word on whether it was cooked or raw.

I Am Legend

I Am Legend is a book-turned-movie-turned-remake starring Will Smith. I Am Legend is one of the many vampire / zombie movies created in the new millennium. Will Smith plays an isolated, anti-social scientist trying to save humanity. In one scene which displays the character's anti-social-ness, Smith has a hard time being around people and exclaims that he was saving that bacon. This resulted in several parody images and videos.

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Bacon Branding

Bacony Eats

There are two kinds of people in this world... those that eat bacon... and those that are child raping Muslims. Those in the later category are, to put it simply, wrong. They are abominations of overly abundant breeding of humans, if Hitler had done his job correctly he would have wiped them all out along with the Jews before gargling the proverbial shotgun mouthwash in a fit of Führer failure.

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Bacon Art

Much like your average "Moon Sister" on her monthly cycle who feels compelled to create crafts from her vaginal crevices, so too do bacon fanatics and fans alike enjoy turning otherwise perfectly good pig into useless, largely inedible "art". Often for the sole purpose of preening over their porkish devotions like a pretentious, self-infatuated jackass with a bloated ego to match the Brobdingnagian size of their bacon fat infused bellies.

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Dessert Bacon

At some point worldly scholars the world over came to the philosophical determination that bacon simply wasn't bad enough for your health all on its own and came to the conclusion that in order to truly maximize its heart stopping plenipotentiary it would simply have to be combined with confectionery components of a diabetic inducing class. And thus, the art of dessert bacon was born!

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Generally Useless Shit

With great obsession comes obsessive marketing! With everyone under the sun firmly entrenched in the carnal pleasures of seared piglet flesh it comes as no surprise that every other two-bit hack is trying to "cash in" on the trend, with every manner of pointless products to liter your shelves and needlessly complicate your meandering little life with. All of them of course grossly over priced, manufactured in Mexico or chiseled out in China via Commie, consumerist pandering, profiteers running slave labor shops shelling out shiny, shit grade, shlock to any available dumbfuck American idiot who will buy into it.

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See also

is part of a series on
Food and Drink

[BleurghOm Nom Nom]

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Bacon is part of a series on


Featured article March 18 & 19, 2013
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