⚠️ Encyclopedia Dramatica is currently being restored by automated scripts ⚠️
There's been a lot of questions as to what's going on with the site and what comes next. So we have this (ordered) roadmap of what's being worked on and what's to come. This will be updated until the roadmap is complete as Æ has a lot of missing features and ideas that I'd like to fix in regards to its offerings before I implement big plans for the site's popularity and well-being in 2021.
Æ Roadmap
Content restoration (Mostly done, few things missing that will be restored sporadically)
Image restoration (Being run in background, nothing I can do cept wait)
Æ Imageboard (Currently being worked on)
Mediawiki upgrade and backend fixes
.onion domain for Tor-friendly editing and viewing
CSS overhaul (Fixing things like the videos on mobile, and overall a rehaul of the wiki's look to be more friendly to readers)
Paid bounty board for new articles (Won't be managed by me for legal reasons however I will ensure it runs smoothly)
Anonymous phone # service for those seeking ban evades from Twitter as well as a phone number not tied to their name (more details at launch)
Currently we are nearing our annual LLC renewal fee ($650) as well throwing the funds required for these other changes and aspects. If you would like to support Æ consider purchasing a copy of The Hustler's Bible or securing some Merch. Donating is also appreciated however I would rather give something back as per the two options above.
If you have any questions you can join our public Telegram chat to DM me privately or @ me in chat.
You can also email me via [email protected]
Merch notes: Thank you to all who have purchased merch. We will ship late January or mid February depending on our provider's speed.
Here's to setting the world on fire in 2021!
- aediot
Audiophile
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Warning! Audiophiles are everywhere. There may be one in your house RIGHT NOW! |
An audiophile is a person who is into otic sex, that is sex with ears. It comes from the Greek audios, sound, and philos, fucking. Audiophiles also will have sex with CDs and tie themselves up with speaker cable. Especially pretentious audiophiles will favor old vinyl records, saying they feel "warmer". When they can't get something on vinyl, they will attempt to run everything else through an expensive tube processor to make it sound "warmer".
An audiophile can be spotted by their habit of complaining about MP3s and using only FLAC, because the high frequency sounds that even your dog can't hear get stripped out in compression.
Audiophiles will often spend at least 100 dollars on gold speaker cable, because they think that the raw pretentiousness will make them have an audiorgasm. Sadly for them, there is no known mechanism that can make MCR sound any good. Audiophiles are all deaf, however, and as a result they can't actually tell the difference between those $5 earphones you bought at Go-Lo and $250 Sennheiser HD555s.
True audiophiles will spend $50,000 on designer hand-made speakers, $7,000 speaker cable, $10,000 in power filtering equipment and a $5,000 vinyl player, and still won't be able to tell the difference between it and a $500 system without lying through their teeth.
Contents
How to spot an Audiophile
- If outdoors (rare) will be wearing three sets of noise - canceling headphones, because one just doesn't cut it.
- Will have no money for little things like gas, food or clothes.
- Will have a 160GB iPod with only three songs on it, due to their compulsion to have everything completely uncompressed.
- Will probably be a Mac user.
- Will spend $120 on a Telefunken-branded triode when Sovtek sells the same damn tube for eight dollars, and will claim to be able to tell the difference.
- Will have the vast majority of their house (mortgaged) full of their sound system, which will sound shit because audiophiles all think that broken "classic" parts pwn modern things like 7:1 surround sound.
- Bought the 2009 Beatles Mono Box set, which somehow costs more than the stereo set.
See also: SHAKTI Stone
Trolling Audiophiles
- Alternatively, you can tell them that the high frequencies that they can't actually hear which are preserved in their favored music format, FLAC, could possibly cancel out some of the frequencies that they can hear. This will make them question everything they have ever known.
- Tell them you downloaded and listened to some MP3s the other day, and emphasize how great the music sounded. This will cause instant rage from an audiophile as they will go into an angry rant about how much better FLAC sounds and how with FLAC the bass sounds bassier, the highs higher, and the middles more middly, and other assorted bullshit.
- Tell them how awesome your speakers sound that you picked up at the thrift store for only $15 the other day.
- Ask why FLAC files are so damn big.
- Ask them why anybody would want to use such an outdated format like vinyl when CDs are cheaper, portable, and much easier and cheaper to play back.
Audiophiles pwned for good
When actual case studies are done, it is conclusively shown that audiophiles are delusional idiots who waste massive amounts of money on equipment that gives them absolutely no real improvement in sound quality.
—Dr. Bob Dean |
—dmaxwell |
External Links
- http://www.audiophileusa.com/ - Rare and collectible records
- http://www.audioasylum.com/ - Assorted audio crap
- http://www.goatse.fr - Goatse
- P.W.B. Electronics - When audiophiles and hippy-mystics collide
- http://www.audiopligg.com/ - Full of sexy news for audiophiles.
- lolgirl.mp3 Serious Audiophile
- http://6moons.com/ - Reviews of overpriced audiophile hardware
- Audiokarma - An audiophile message board, RIPE FOR TROLLING
See Also
- FLAC - The audiophile's preferred music file format.
- Unwarranted Self-Importance
- Elitist
- Hipster
- What.CD
- Waffles.fm
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Audiophile is part of a series on Visit the Music Portal for complete coverage. |
Audiophile is part of a series on
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